Red Ranger 1 Posted May 3, 2009 Report Share Posted May 3, 2009 Oh boy...That was great.Glad Rachel and Hugo seem to be getting back on track.Macca's really fouled up, hasn't he?How far is Karen going to go? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Slade Posted May 3, 2009 Report Share Posted May 3, 2009 Brilliant! That scene with Rachel and Hugo was really well presented with some very believable dialogue too. This is getting really exciting now. Macca’s pretty much finished isn’t he? The only question that remains is will any harm come anyone else. Can’t wait to find out what happens next and also if Martha does get the chance to confront Macca about what he did. Looking forward to the next update. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Barbara Posted May 3, 2009 Report Share Posted May 3, 2009 Rachel and Hugo are not breaking up. I hope they'll be able to get through it. I thought Macca had changed but his ex-girlfriend has brain damage! Now Martha might suffer because of his stupid behaviour. I hope Karen won't hurt Martha, Roman and/or their children. They don't deserve that. I can't wait to read more. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
KaiyaBlake Posted May 3, 2009 Report Share Posted May 3, 2009 Rachel and Hugo I knew Karen was no good I wonder who she has? I hope she doesn't hurt them Loved it. Can't wait for more Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Laura Posted May 5, 2009 Report Share Posted May 5, 2009 Thanks Kevin, Kirsty, Sarah, Red Ranger, Slade, Barbara and KaiyaBlake I thought chapter would turn out to be quite good but it ended up really boring But I hope there's a suprise in the next chapter for you Chapter 14 Martha just stood there for a minute. She had frozen on the spot. “What the hell is this going on about?” She thought to herself. She automatically thought Macca was the one she had. “Or is this a trap?” She started questioning whether she should go or not. OK she had decided she wasn’t going to risk it. If this wasn’t a trap then she didn’t want to not have done anything. She started looking around for her keys then 2 minutes later she found them under the kitchen table. She ran out to the car and tried putting the key in the keyhole as fast as she could but she kept missing. Once she had finally got the key in and started driving, all she could think about was who had sent the letter. “And what was this about Macca having to pay?” She pushed harder on the accelerator, not knowing how much time she had. She was looking at the signs on side of the road. “Almost there”, she thought to herself. “Just round the corner”. She turned into Dunmore Road and saw a row of 7 houses. She wasn’t sure what house it was. She got out the car and half ran down the round trying to find which one it was. All the houses looked abandoned but one house had a car parked at the side. She entered the house and made her way down the hall. She was tip-toeing as quietly as she could, trying to find whoever was here. She looked in the living room but it was deserted and didn’t look like it had ever had anyone in it. She heard a crash from upstairs. She stood still for a minute, scared of who was up there. Waiting for her. Once she reached the top of the stairs, she walked into the room she heard noise coming from and slowly opened the door. Popping her head round the door before she fully entered she froze. She couldn’t believe what was in front of her eyes. She had to blink a couple of times before she really believed what she saw. Karen. With a gun pointing at the man she loved. “Martha, you came” Karen said, with a weird and twisted smile on her face. “Why don’t take a seat?” She added and started laughing when Martha just stood there, not being able to speak. “What…how…?” Martha said. “Well, it started when Macca started going out with my little girl. 19 she was. Just 19 years old. And now the poor girl’s life is ruined thanks to your brother!” Karen spat out, clearly angry and upset. “What?” Martha said in disbelief. Her eyes were fixated on the gun and person it was pointing at. “He hit her. And it wasn’t the first time. And she got brain damage. And now I’m here to get to ruin his family like he did mine” Martha jumped and so did Karen. They heard a noise from downstairs. Someone was walking round the downstairs of the house, and then made their way up the stairs. They opened the first door on the left but it was empty so looked in the next room. Macca had burst through the door, with his eyes moving from Karen and the gun. “Donna, don’t do this” Macca pleaded. “Donna?” Martha looked even more confused now. “Yes, Donna. She lied about her name and about pretty much everything she told you” “But, is, is it true? What she said?” Martha asked. “What did she say?” “About her daughter. And you” Martha informed Macca. “How could you! I thought you’d changed” Martha shouted at him, ashamed to think of him as her brother. “Macca, I said you and your family would pay and now its time” Karen laughed. “No!” Martha was so scared. Just as Karen was about to pull the trigger Macca jumped forward and knocked the gun out of her hand. Martha tried grabbing the gun what was on the floor whilst Karen and Macca were struggling. Martha was just about to grab it when Karen pushed her over and got hold of the gun. There was a struggle between Karen, Macca and Martha and all of a sudden a gunshot went off. “Jack!” Martha shouted, as she ran over to the guy who was tied to the chair. Jack’s alive, but who was it who was shot? Martha hears Jack’s story about where he’s been for the last 4 years and why. And she must make a decision between Roman and Jack. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
-Kevin- Posted May 5, 2009 Report Share Posted May 5, 2009 OMFG JACKS ALIVE Brilliant update I wonder who was shot . Please don't shoot Martha . You can kill off Macca or Donna if you want Omg I cant wait for the next chapter Please please pleae update tomorrow , I am loving this fic Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
KaiyaBlake Posted May 5, 2009 Report Share Posted May 5, 2009 My Jack is backkk I agree with Kevin, kill Macca or Donna Loved it. Really can't wait for more Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Inactive User Posted May 5, 2009 Report Share Posted May 5, 2009 Wow great dramatic chapter. Update soon please Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
lino Posted May 5, 2009 Report Share Posted May 5, 2009 Jackyyy is back. Great. I hope you won't let us wait to long. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Red Ranger 1 Posted May 5, 2009 Report Share Posted May 5, 2009 Jack's back...Well, that's gonna take some explaining.Really want to know what happened with that gunshot. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Recommended Posts
Archived
This topic is now archived and is closed to further replies.