charmed60 Posted November 4, 2009 Report Share Posted November 4, 2009 Ahhhh you've got a new fic! Yay Wow Kirsty such a brilliant start. I liked how there was loads going on and you kept jumping from scene to scene, there's a lot of unanswered questions and yaaay Dan's alive! Hehe. The beginning paragraph was just amazing. I didn't know who Rachel was talking about or what she was talking about. I'm presuming it might have something to do with Mark - there's something I don't like about him at all. It seems that you've hinted towards him abusing Rachel although I'm not sure whether it's physical or emotional. He seems to have nice sides to him also so I'm interested to know why he treats Rachel the way he does - is it just the stress of the job? I like that Leah is suspicious, no-one knows you like your best friend!!! Although I guess Dan is right for not letting her throw accusations out, hopefully she'll keep an eye on Rachel. I really liked the scene where she bumped into Tony, she's obviously on edge to have reacted that way for spilling the coffee so it was nice to see that she had someone looking out for her, a new friendship or maybe something more I really like how you've gotten into Rachel's head and clearly explained how she's feeling throughout each chapter. The most poignant line for me was "Anyways she should have known. It was all her fault." Seems that Mark's manipulated her mind enough for her to believe that she deserves however he's treating her, I'm interested to know a bit more about this, when it started etc and for things to become clearer. Interesting last paragraph with Emily seeing Mark Carlton and her reaction. I presume this is Rachel's Mark. She might have a few things to tell Rachel so I'm looking forward to their meeting although I guess she doesn't know that Rachel is Mark's girlfriend yet? Really looking forward to the next chapter. You said you were going to start a new fic and you haven't disappointed This is a lot more dark than your last one but has so much potential and I'm looking forward to reading more. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Danni02 Posted November 4, 2009 Report Share Posted November 4, 2009 (edited) Mark is Rachels boyfriend...I presume this also Mark Carlton that Emily saw in the mag.... Looks like Rachel is getting some sort of abuse... I like that Leah is suspicous! and Dan is alive! And like the sound of Charlie and Angelo being in the fic too. Good start Kirsty! Update soon! Edited November 4, 2009 by Danni02 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
TachelHolden Posted November 5, 2009 Report Share Posted November 5, 2009 Loveee it bless Tony hes such a sweet guy I don't like this Mark but i guess ill wait and see how things turn out Great start Kirsty keep going. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
~Zoe~ Posted November 6, 2009 Report Share Posted November 6, 2009 Great start to the new fiction Kirsty, your writing is really good. Mark is Rachels boyfriend...I presume this also Mark Carlton that Emily saw in the mag Looks like Rach is getting some sort of abuse I like that Leah is suspicous, (as Laura said no one knows you like your best friend) good to have Dan in this fiction too. I liked that scene when Rachel met Tony, a new friendship or maybe something more Its great that you'll be including Charlie & Angelo in this Looking forward to reading more of this! Update soon, xoxo Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
suzannelgnz Posted November 6, 2009 Report Share Posted November 6, 2009 This looks like a really interesting fic Kirsty Poor Rach, I'm just thankful that Leah realises what is going on. Are both Brad and Emily in the fic? I'm really looking forward to reading some more of this fic xxx Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
aweil12 Posted November 6, 2009 Report Share Posted November 6, 2009 i love this more please Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
halcyon06 Posted November 8, 2009 Report Share Posted November 8, 2009 Cant wait to read more Kirsty!! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
champagne_char Posted November 9, 2009 Report Share Posted November 9, 2009 I loooooove it! Kirsty your writing truely is amazing!!!! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
~Zoe~ Posted November 10, 2009 Report Share Posted November 10, 2009 Loved reading this chapter Your writing & the discriptions of the characters & the scenes is brilliant Brilliant update Kirsty! xoxo Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
TachelHolden Posted November 10, 2009 Report Share Posted November 10, 2009 can't believe he kissed her!!! update i need to read more Tachel. Loving this fic its awesome! Poor Rach i feel for her and i really hate Mark Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Recommended Posts
Join the conversation
You can post now and register later. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account.