flyingwithoutwings Posted August 30, 2007 Report Share Posted August 30, 2007 Well, I need to vent! Sorry if this isn't the right place! Today, I went to school just like any other day. My day was fine, up until 2nd break. I was in the canteen line, when this guy I dont even know, started verbally bashing me up so to speak. He called me fat, ugly and any other nasty thing you can think of. He's a jerk and I dont even know him. Usually I wouldnt think anything of it, but this has happened many times before and today was the last straw. Quite a few people have called me fat and ugly etc. and it has made feel less and less of myself and now I feel like absolute s***! In the first term of this year, I was bordering an eating disorder, going for a few days without eating then binging, like Bulimia, but got out of the habit thanks to my friends, but now I feel like I really need to do something about myself, otherwise this is going to keep happening. I am beginning to hate myself and I really want to feel better about myself! And to top that all off, I have just been told that one of my cats has just died, so I feel pratically dead!! And I have just cried about a million and one tears and can't stop, I think I'll probably drown in my tears! :( Could my day get any worse?! xo Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cal Posted August 30, 2007 Report Share Posted August 30, 2007 Well, I need to vent! Sorry if this isn't the right place! Today, I went to school just like any other day. My day was fine, up until 2nd break. I was in the canteen line, when this guy I dont even know, started verbally bashing me up so to speak. He called me fat, ugly and any other nasty thing you can think of. He's a jerk and I dont even know him. Usually I wouldnt think anything of it, but this has happened many times before and today was the last straw. Quite a few people have called me fat and ugly etc. and it has made feel less and less of myself and now I feel like absolute s***! In the first term of this year, I was bordering an eating disorder, going for a few days without eating then binging, like Bulimia, but got out of the habit thanks to my friends, but now I feel like I really need to do something about myself, otherwise this is going to keep happening. I am beginning to hate myself and I really want to feel better about myself! And to top that all off, I have just been told that one of my cats has just died, so I feel pratically dead!! And I have just cried about a million and one tears and can't stop, I think I'll probably drown in my tears! Could my day get any worse?! xo Well, we all know that the guy is a total prick. So don't take any notice to him! He used all of his one brain cell to walk up to you, leaving no intelligence for when he opened his mouth. If he had one more brain cell, he'd be a chair. Anyway... Seriously though, don't take any notice to him. Don't let this dude get you down! I know it's easier said than done, but do try and ignore him and have a good time. And don't worry what other people think... As for the border-line eating disorder, I can't give advice because I've never been in that type of situation. But just try and remain strong and you should pull through. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
emmasi Posted August 30, 2007 Report Share Posted August 30, 2007 I'm sorry for your loss. My cat "died" (or was murdered by the vet while I stood by and watched), just over a year ago. I still cry about it sometimes, so... I understand it's not fun, and you really don't need that on top of everything else. You sound like you have some really good friends who really care about you, and who you listen to, which is great. Anyone else's opinion just isn't worth your trouble. It takes some kind of insecurity to want to verbally abuse a stranger - a BIG insecurity. That guy was probably showing off for his friends because he's terrified that they won't like him otherwise. Pretty sad really. That, or he was having a really bad day and you just happened to be in his path. Either way, it doesn't sound like it's about you personally, so I wouldn't worry too much about it. I'm sure it hurt and was embarassing but if you've dealt with it before, you can deal with it again. Hang in there, and remember your friends are there to support you. And the next time some jerk abuses you, just tell them that you pity them for having to make up for their own insecurities by hasseling someone else. If he had one more brain cell, he'd be a chair. lol Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
flyingwithoutwings Posted August 30, 2007 Report Share Posted August 30, 2007 Thanks guys that really helped, and Cal, the comment about this guy and the chair just put a much needed smile on my face!! xo Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Pierced Musie Posted August 30, 2007 Report Share Posted August 30, 2007 Andy, I sent you a PM Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Oxidizer Posted August 30, 2007 Report Share Posted August 30, 2007 Thanks, Musie. Replied. I didn't see the pop-up. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cerise Posted August 30, 2007 Report Share Posted August 30, 2007 Not much of a problem. Not in need of support, because it's probably nothing... I just feel crappy all the time. I never see the point in getting out of bed, or following the damn daily routines over and over again. I hate that about life. Routines. That was the one thing I actually hated about School. Now I have to go and work and then go to College and it will be thec same every day. Work from 6 - 3:30, Bus at 3:35, Home at 4:15. I feel so crappy and worthless that i don't deserve a full life. I turned down so many great opportunities this Summer, Trips with Friends, Holidays, Summer Courses I could have attended because I feel like I don't deserve it. All i deserve is to sit on my ass all day doing bugger all. I have major self-Esteem problems but thats not really the issue here. I don't know what the issue is. It's just everyone says to me I have to get into a Routine. I'm already in a f*cking boring routine. My bad moods have really driven people away from me and I really don't see the point in living this life anymore. That sounds a little dramatic, I just want to change my life but I'm stuck. What hurt me the most was I actually got great Leaving Cert results and heard people whispering 'Oh my god HOW did she get 600 Points?'. Meaning 'Isnt she meant to be stupid? She has dyslexia.' or 'I hate that ugly fat chick. I didnt expect people I hate to get great results! She's stupid. I hate her and I'm so perfect'. Actually, someone said the latter to her friend the other day... HOW can people who are horrible think they are so brilliant, and how can half-way decent people hate themselves? My friends (my real friends. Not the others) have all been through horrible stuff, and so have I, and we're (well, they are, I'm not sure about me) actually good people. I don't understand it. -Over Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
alexx Posted August 31, 2007 Report Share Posted August 31, 2007 Believe me, your not alone about the routine thing. Ive been there, the thought of work every day for the rest of my ‘youth’ and later life was absolutely depressing, I felt like a zombie, alarm at 6am, feel ****, no time for food, rush to the bus stop (its either be in a rush or get up even earlier…no thanks). At work it wasn’t too bad as I didn’t mind the job or the people, but as soon as 2pm arrived and it was off home, I’d be sat on the bus watching people surfing, beautiful blue sky and people smiling and laughing and I’d feel even more down on myself for being so depressing. Things had to change, getting home and going to bed so early to get up so early and do the same thing day in day out, only living for the weekend, was crap. So I quit. Best thing I’ve ever done, you are right you need a change if you are unhappy. A totally different and exciting direction, if you’re seriously unhappy with the idea of living your routine, you can be proud of yourself for being spontaneous and daring to just stop everything and change, but if you can really focus on succeeding with it, you will. Obviously you gotta plan, but if you decided to do it, think of it as an adventure, and character building! I don't know why there are idiots out there who actually appear to have a very high opinion of themselves, I'll almost guarantee they don’t, its just a show, and a lot of them have been so totally spoilt they don’t use there brains as everyone’s done everything for them, bad upbringing, no real sense of empathy and lack of structure, but all in all they either haven’t got the intelligence to figure they are the ones with a huge problem, or they have such little respect for others because they have such little respect for themselves. Hopefully they’ll grow out of it once they get into the ‘real world’ and realise people just don’t tolerate stuff like that for strangers or after they receive a smack in the mouth and it knocks some sense into them. Or, they remain that way forever and come to realise no one around them actually likes or respects them. Either way, you know you’re a better person, so don’t let it drag you down. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
emmasi Posted August 31, 2007 Report Share Posted August 31, 2007 I don't know why there are idiots out there who actually appear to have a very high opinion of themselves, I'll almost guarantee they don’t, its just a show, and a lot of them have been so totally spoilt they don’t use there brains as everyone’s done everything for them, bad upbringing, no real sense of empathy and lack of structure, but all in all they either haven’t got the intelligence to figure they are the ones with a huge problem, or they have such little respect for others because they have such little respect for themselves. Hopefully they’ll grow out of it once they get into the ‘real world’ and realise people just don’t tolerate stuff like that for strangers or after they receive a smack in the mouth and it knocks some sense into them. Or, they remain that way forever and come to realise no one around them actually likes or respects them. That's exactly how I feel about myself. But when I have no one's respect, and I don't respect them because of it... it's a catch 22, and I can't see a way to make myself really want to change for the benifit of people who don't take me as a I am - the way THEY'VE made me. It sux. I almost want something horrible to happen to me, just to know what it feels like to have someone care so much that they'd risk going to jail to show how much they hate me. Something honest and real. It'd be a change. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
100%me Posted August 31, 2007 Report Share Posted August 31, 2007 Im not sure where to put this so I thought maybe it goes here. Last night I put my daughter to bed at 9pm after her feed (as we always do) on her back without blankets or sheets as she doesnt like them she always kicks them off so we dont bother with them anymore the problem is we didnt wake last night until 5am ( I only woke to look at the time),when I realised it was 5am I checked on her because I didnt know if my partner had fed her during the night. Anyways I found her fast asleep on her tummy.She is only 12 weeks old. Is she old enough to sleep on her tummy if she turnes herself that way? For all mums and dads out there Im hoping you could answer this for me? Thanks x Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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