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Stone the Crows it's Christmas (by pembie) - comments


Danni02

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This fic get FUNNIER and WEIRDER [in a good ways] and STRANGER [also in a good way] by the chapter, especially.............

 Santa, “Well Ric it seems you have done a top job on my Christmas cracker.”

Ric, “Isn’t that Mrs Clause’s job?”

 Santa, “Oh for the love of God woman please tell me you didn’t just pull that out from your bra?”

Colleen, “Well its handy place to store this piece of very important document. It is times like these I need to remind you why you are Santa.”

Ric, “What is so important about that tatty looking piece of paper that you stuff down your bra for safe keeping?”

Ric turns a shade of green just thinking about it.

Colleen, “This is the very special and binding commitment of the upmost animate responsibly one can ask of someone. The person who signs himself up must understand the importance of being jolly, fat, likes the colour red and gets on well with children.”

Ric, “Sounds nothing like you Granddad.”

 Santa, “Blue same colour as the water I fish in.”

Colleen “Blue now that would look ridiculous it would be like the kids would be getting a visit from a jolly breaded cookie monster.”

 Reindeer Irene runs round in excited circles.

 Santa, “What the hell are you on about this is Ailsa the reindeer I named her after Ailsa.”

Rudolph, “I don’t know Santa silly humans.”

 Santa, “Fairy dust plus Bianca’s magical punch helps.”

 Miles, “Yes but Rabbit that was rather naughty of you using all King Xavier’s bubble bath like that.”

Rabbit, “Well he did say help yourself and you will get the blame seeing as no one but you can see me.”

 Miles turns to try the door handle, but it feels like someone is holding it tightly from the other side.

Rabbit happily takes the tiny key that she has magically made appear out of thin air and turns it in the lock.

 Kitchen Wench Leah quickly sweeps her way over to Miles pining him against the door. Miles blushes as she wraps one of her see through stocking filled legs round him.

Kitchen Wench Leah, “Well your going to try Greek tonight Mister I can tell you.”

 Santa, “Stupid flaming thing didn’t it see us?”

Ric, “Well no Granddad you have just activated the invisibility cloaking gadget.”

 Ruby, “I will give you a big wet kiss if you stop singing.”

 Charlie, “Hands up that’s it slowly.”

Santa, “It’s me you flaming pair of galahs.”

Charlie, “Shut up show some respect.”

Angelo, “Who are you sir?”

Santa, “Oh I don’t know the flaming Easter bunny.”

 Heath seeming quite clever that he was distracted but his favourite song Barbie Girl coming on the radio.

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ADORED that !!!!!, especially.............

 Sally, “Blah Blah what a load of glittering sprinkles that is.”

Tinker Bell, “No its not and its easy for you, you have that nice handsome hobbit Flynn wanting to take you too the fairly Christmas ball, but I don’t have anyone wanting to take me.”

 BFA, “Roman I got new friend.”

 BFA, “My friend looks cute enough to eat.”

 Tinker Bell, What kind of stupid name is that? I mean what does it stand for?”

BFA, “Big Friendly Aden.”

 Tinker Bell, “Tinker Bell but I like to be called Belle for short, but that is besides the point since you are going to put me right back in my treetop home.”

 Belle, “Oh my your not shy in coming forwards are you?”

Big Friendly Aden, “I do not understand your way of talking.”

 One of the reasons of course was her having to flee the bay with Goblin Hugo after he had eaten a load of children.

 In that way you would have everyone falling under you spell and Brax certainly found himself falling under her spell as his lingering eyes hovered round Martha bosom area.

Hugo the Goblin, “HEY TROLL STOP PREVING AT MY HOT WITCH GRILFRIEND.”

 Heath, “Oh goody can I sit on Santa’s lap? I will be right back.”

 Brax, “Oh I don’t know. How about your trying to destroy and ruin Christmas?”

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