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Friends (by Skykat) - comments


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Beautifully written, Kat. :) I especially liked the build-up of the romantic moment:

she had sat hunched over her desk, her shoulders, hands, mind, everything aching. Physically and mentally exhausted. He had started with a massage, his big, smooth, masculine hands gently kneading the knots out of her neck and shoulders. She had been instantly relaxed, her best friend doing what he always did, soothing, comforting, taking all her cares away.

She had thought she was imagining it at first. His breath, warm on her neck, had planted a gentle kiss on her skin and she had dismissed it as nothing. Then it had happened again and his lips had been hot against the nape of her neck and she had shivered involuntarily as he had traced a line round to her mouth, capturing her lips in his, kissing her as she had never been kissed before. And she had kissed him back.

And, as always, a very realistic dialogue:

Yeah, it’s weird, isn’t it? Still good though, huh? We get to hit the big wide world now.” Ever the optimist, he refused to be down, even for a second.

“That’s assuming we pass of course,” she reminded him.

"So what now then?” She asked the deliberately open question but her heart was pounding with the need for a definite answer. She pulled her clear pencil case closer to her chest, still not daring to look at him.

“Now we go the pub.” His enthusiasm was infectious and for a whole afternoon of matching each other in the pint downing stakes, just as they’d done many a night before

As the tyres whipped up a cloud of dust it felt as if a whole chapter of her life had disappeared in a puff of smoke. The sun warmed the back of her neck but she doubted those parts of her body would ever feel warmth the way they had when he had kissed her.

That’s a lovely description, I could actually feel it.

Well done on a great story. :D It was so realistic I can’t help wondering if the best friend/falling in love is based on an actual experience...? :unsure:

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What a gorgeous fic Skykat. I just love the Rachel/Hugh pairing and the way that you've written the fic based on their earlier years. It's like I was in that exam watching the two of them with their nervous tension and facial expressions.

I especially liked the descriptiveness and the angst of this fic as I was on the edge of my seat and willing myself to keep reading as curiosity got the better of me. By the end of the fic I so wanted a happy ending but at least it was left in a hopeful state.

I hope that you will write more one-shot fics especially with a Rachel/Hugh pairing as the board is sadly lacking with fics of that variety.

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First of all: I feel guilty for not getting back to you about the last draft of the first chapter of that other fic yet. You should never trust me when I say I'm gonna do something by a certain date. So sorry, I will do it very soon!

Now: this fic.

I really enjoyed reading this, you really described the feelings well and made it very easy to understand how they both feel.

She glanced across the room to where he sat. To somebody who didn’t know him, he looked completely at ease, his long legs stretched out under the table, his broad shoulders slouched back comfortably, relaxed against the hard wood chair. So relaxed, so leisurely and unhurried, that the paper he scanned could have been a sports paper or car magazine, even some random advertising leaflet.

Probably my favourite paragraph, amazingly well written!

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her pepper pot of curls held up by a clip that could barely restrain them. One loose tendril had escaped and was resting just over her eyes and it was all he could do not to run over there, push it back behind her ears and kiss those beautiful lips, smooth away those tears.

I meant to add I really liked that part too. :)

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Thanks guys. Eli don't worry bout the other fic, I said no hurry. Afterall I've been sitting on this and that one for months now. :P

Quiet achiever: I'm struggling with my writing at the moment so I'm only really writing stuff that I'm really inspired to do and this storyline was just something I'd have loved to see acted out in a flashback so I thought I'd write it. I can't promise any more Rachel/ Hugh stuff unless I get a wave of inspiration but I am working on some fics with random pairings and underused in fanfic characters if that helps. :)

ILM, Pepper pot is the colour my mum used to call my hair before I started dying it. She used to say it was like a pepper pot because it contained loads of different colours and didn't stand out as a particular colour. I kind of see Rachel's hair like that as sometimes its brown, sometimes red and also blonde, it just seemed like the right word to use.

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ILM, Pepper pot is the colour my mum used to call my hair before I started dying it. She used to say it was like a pepper pot because it contained loads of different colours and didn't stand out as a particular colour. I kind of see Rachel's hair like that as sometimes its brown, sometimes red and also blonde, it just seemed like the right word to use.

Aw, it's a shame you dyed it, that sounded a lovely colour. My own hair is a boring lightish brown :( tho I get natural highlights in the sun. Anyway, it was a great description. :)

Thanks for the info re Cassie's surname being Turner, I don't know where I got Parker from. I went over to fanfic.net to change it on SBH there and discovered I hadn't even listed her in the list of main characters at the beginning of the story :rolleyes: plus I've got Martha down as a Stewart and she's still a McKenzie - isn't she...? :unsure: But it's a bit more complicated changing things over there, I think you have to delete and re-submit the chapter... *sigh*

ps I've begun editing the chapters of SBH that I've posted on fanfic.net so that we can take the story along the lines we planned, hope you don't mind.

pps Isn't it nice to be the only two people who know what's gong to happen in that story? :P

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  • 4 weeks later...

I read this awhile ago but forgot to review.

Hello again!! I have missed your writing!! You're so talented and I love reading your fics!!

Your descriptions here were brilliant, all of it was playing out in my mind. Some piecfes of writing I struggle to do that with, but yours is always so descriptive, and I feel like I'm travelling along with the story.

She looked across at where he sat and this time he looked up, his intense brown eyes meeting hers as he waved his hand, asking silently whether the exam was a thumbs up or thumbs down. She gestured back her indication that it had been so so and wasn’t surprised when she received a thumbs up in return. She couldn’t help but grin, her best friend always had to go one better.

That was a cute moment. It really captured something that best friends would do. (It reminded me of my test for my high school and my friends and I weren't allowed to talk at all so we communicated in sign language half the time!!)

Irritably she tapped her fingers in a random rhythm against the desk and chewed anxiously on the end of her pen. The clock on the wall seemed to fade in and out of focus but the tick, tock was almost ominous. Echoing through the silence inside her.

GREAT beginning! It's one of those things that really has meaning, and it's something that I can't seem to think of. Very nice!!

THe saddest part for me was the ending. It left everything so unfinished, and, being me, I just needed to know what happened. But I suppose it's very realistic. No happily ever afters, because I really don't know any!!!

I really loved that - not usually a fan of oneshots because I'm always like 'What happens next though!?!?!?' but I truly enjoyed reading that!

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  • QUIET ACHIEVER changed the title to Friends (by Skykat) - comments

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