Release

[Ludub]

14 minutes ago, Red Ranger 1 said:

Nice chapter! Kyle and Josh are possibly jumping to conclusions here: It's possible the note is being investigated but Cameron isn't saying anything until they know more.Josh should probably answer his phone instead of putting together a lynch mob.Looking forward to more!

Thanks Red! Welcome back! Hope you had a good holiday? You're absolutely right, of course. The sensible thing would have been for Josh to answer his phone, or better yet, just ask him about it in the first place... but that's not the Home and Away 'way'  Glad you enjoyed it!

[Ludub]

Just a note to say I'm really sorry about the massive gap between chapters. I've been pretty sick the last while (nothing too serious, don't worry) but I just haven't had the energy to write. That's highly unusual for me. I should have a chapter in the next day or two though. Again, apologies! xx

[pembie]

If I could I would send you some hot soup and Lemsip but even super fast broadband isn't that advanced.

[Ludub]

Apologies again for the big delay. This one's a bit gross (not gonna lie to you) but I hope you like it nonetheless... I have another chapter part written so there shouldn't be too big a gap for the next one.

WARNING: ADULT THEMES!

 

Chapter 8

 

Four weeks ago…

 

Jiao sighed as she watched her husband fitfully sleeping beside her in their small wooden bunkbed. He never slept much, but when he did, he always seemed to have these nightmares. He’d disappear into a world that she knew nothing about. A world full of memories of a traumatic past that he refused to talk about. It was like he’d wiped the man that he used to be before he was kidnapped and reinvented himself as someone else. She wasn’t allowed to ask him about what went before. It was off limits. A ‘no go’ area. It was only in his dreams that he went back there. Only in his dreams that he allowed himself to be ‘Brax’ again, and not ‘Déwei’. When he was back there, he spoke in English, not that she could understand him. He said strange things like ‘KC’ and something that sounded like ‘Eeef’. She tried to understand what he was saying but none of it made any sense to her. She’d never learnt English past a few basic phrases that all the kids learned when they were little. She’d asked him to teach her and the kids but he’d always refused. He seemed to think that it would single them out and make them targets. She’d given up arguing with him.

“Mhhhrmmm” he moaned, as his breathing picked up speed and he shifted a little.

She shook her head. Why couldn’t he open up to her? Why didn’t he trust her?! She gazed down at his sleeping face, illuminated a little bit by the moonlight coming in from the barred window. She wondered what was going on his head. What was he dreaming about?

 

~~~

 

Brax’s dream…

 

“Oh ****!” groaned Brax as he tried to lift his head off the floor. It was pounding and pounding in rhythm with his accelerated heartbeat, as though someone was hitting him repeatedly with a sledgehammer. He felt dizzy too. “Christ!” he moaned, shaking his head as he tried to sit up. He was too weak now to stand but he had painful abdominal cramps that had been getting worse over the last few hours. They were just grinding away there like someone twisting his insides up with their bare hands. It had got to breaking point now, and he knew that he was going to have to try to get up. Either that, or he was going to have an accident, and he really didn’t want that. As he began to sit up, he felt the whole world tilt on its axis, and his head begin to really spin. “Oh God!” he moaned as he flopped back down again and began hyperventilating, “I’m gonna be sick.”

‘You gonna just lie there?’ said a voice, ‘You just gonna give up?’ The sound seemed to reverberate around the metal walls of the container and echo in his head. ‘That’s not the Brax that I know…’ the voice continued mockingly, ‘That doesn’t sound like my big brother, now does it?’

He gave a sad little snort and shook his head again. He would have known that voice anywhere. It was Casey.

‘Come on, Brax?!’ the voice continued to sneer, ‘You’re a Braxton… a Riverboy… You’re not gonna give in this easily, are you? …Are you just gonna let them win?!’

He couldn’t see him because it was pitch dark in the shipping container. There wasn’t even a chink of light, not like the van they’d had him in to begin with. “Shut up!” he growled back at him, “You try living on sugary **** for weeks! In the dark… no idea where they’re taking you...”

‘Oh… wah wah wah’ he taunted him, ‘Poor little Darryl… feeling so sorry for himself…’

“Shut up!” he shouted, “What do you know anyway?! You’re ****in’ dead!”

There was a sort of hiss of laughter as Casey continued to mock him. ‘Whose fault is that?’ he asked, whispering it quietly in his ear, ‘You were supposed to protect me, weren’t you, Brax?! …And look what happened!’

A cold chill ran down his back. He’d always blamed himself for Casey’s death but hearing him say it just tore his heart out. “You’re dead” he repeated, in a quieter tone of voice, “You’re not real.”

‘No, I’m not’ laughed Casey, ‘I’m just a figment of your ****ed up imagination… but you know what Brax?! You’ve finally gone and done it, haven’t you? Finally got yourself into a mess that you can’t get yourself out of… and it’s no-one’s fault but your own!’

“I know that” he sighed, “Don’t you think I know that?!”

‘You just couldn’t resist!’ he teased him, ‘Couldn’t pass up the opportunity to be the big man… You wanted that excitement, didn’t you?!’

“**** you!” he snarled, “I was just trying to help… I didn’t have a choice!”

‘Sure, you didn’t’ sniggered Casey, ‘Keep telling yourself that, Brax! We both know the truth…’

“And now I’m gonna have to pay for it” he said, finishing Casey’s sentence. With that, he gave an exasperated giggle because he realised that he was talking to himself. Casey wasn’t really here, any more than Charlie had been here yesterday… And Ricky hadn’t been here either. No-one was. He was alone in the dark, locked in a shipping container, and he didn’t even know where he was!

“Okay” he grunted, speaking to no-one in particular, as another painful cramp overtook his body. With an enormous amount of effort, he managed to slowly roll himself over onto his knees and began to crawl with distaste towards the area of the container that he’d designated as a toilet. The stench was overpowering and he began to retch the closer that he got to it. He desperately wanted to stand so that he wouldn’t get any on his hands but he knew that his legs simply wouldn’t hold him now. 27 days without food had taken their toll. All he’d had to drink since they’d put him in here was sugary soft drinks and it was wreaking havoc with his digestive system. He felt like he was dying. In fact, he knew that he was. He hadn’t had a solid bowel movement in weeks and everyone knows that diarrhoea leads to dehydration, which ultimately leads to death. Man cannot live on processed sugars alone!

When he got close to the ‘toilet’ he pulled himself onto his knees and began to hurriedly undo his filthy trousers. A sharp cramp overtook him and he had to crouch as fast as he could and just let go.

‘Jesus! You reek!’ said Heath, obviously standing on the other side of the container, ‘The least you could have done is warn me!’

“I’m sorry” he muttered quietly.

‘No seriously! That’s foul!’ he laughed at him.

Doing this in front of Heath was humiliating, even if he knew that he wasn’t really there. He began to sob, as another gush of diarrhoea flooded out of him, and his whole body shuddered violently. He’d never felt more pathetic or weak. “I’m sorry!” he said again.

‘You should be!’ sneered Heath, ‘Because of you, I’m dead… I told you I didn’t want to do it, but you just had to drag me into things… Bianca was expecting another baby… What do you think it did to her when I went missing?! Huh?!” That’s when he heard the baby start crying. “I guess Casey’s death wasn’t enough for you?!’ he snarled. The sound of a baby crying bounced off the metal walls and seemed to drill into his already pained head.

“Shut up!” he growled back at him, “I don’t know if you’re dead or not… Maybe they found you?!” It was a fear that had been playing on him for weeks now. What if Smithy had killed Heath? What if Bianca had lost the baby as a result? How would he ever live with himself?

‘And maybe they didn’t’ said Heath, ‘Maybe Smithy put me in a shallow grave?’

“I’m sorry” choked Brax, “I’m sorry, okay?!” Tears were flooding down his face and his whole body was shaking. It was probably the fourth or fifth time in the last day that he’d had to make a trip to the toilet, but he was too out of it now to really grasp the passage of time. He did have a watch, but the days had started to bleed into each other, and he’d been drifting in and out of consciousness. He was delirious. He had no idea how long he’d been in here now. Not with the pitch darkness. He’d open his eyes to pure blackness, and begin to panic every single time, until he realised where he was. They had given him a tiny little flashlight but he was saving the batteries now. They’d started to fail after a day or two, and he didn’t know how much longer they’d last. The thought of having to live in total darkness terrified him, so he kept it hanging round his neck, as a challenge to himself, to go as long as possible without. It had come to hold great symbolic importance to him. It meant that he had light. He was just choosing not to use it. As long as he still had that then he felt like he still had some control over something. Once that was gone, he didn’t know what he’d do. He lifted the flashlight and pointed it in the direction of his brother’s voice and the wailing baby in his arms. He clicked it on. There was no-one there. Suddenly the container was silent again, and he gave a shuddering sigh as he clicked the light off again. Heath and the baby were gone. “I’m still sorry” he whispered.

After what felt like an eternity, he shakily pulled his trousers back up and began to crawl back towards his ‘bed’.  It was slow going because he was so weak and tired, and his legs were like jelly.  His body had essentially emptied itself, and in many ways, he felt like he was empty too. Emotionally and mentally. Drained to the point of no return. He had nothing left.

When he got back to the pile of sacking material on the floor, he slumped with his back against the wall, and reached for one of the cans beside him. He held it in his hands, weighing it back and forth, and shuddered at the thought of drinking it. He was so thirsty! But what he wanted was water! Fresh clean water… not a sickly mixture of carbonated sugar and chemicals. His whole body was crying out to him for something healthy. He kept daydreaming about broccoli and spinach and other green veg and fruit. He wanted fish and meat, and anything that didn’t involve sickly sugary sweetness. More than anything else, he wanted salt. He ran his tongue over his teeth and wondered if he’d have any left by the time they let him out.

‘What if they never let you out?’ asked Ricky, and he jumped because he felt her hand softly brush against his face. He tried to tell himself that she wasn’t really there but he leaned into her touch. He needed some comfort right now. ‘What if we never see you again?’ she whispered in his ear, ‘How am I gonna raise Case on my own?!’

 

~~~

 

“I’m sorry, Ric!” he sobbed in his sleep, and tears began to roll down his cheeks, “I didn’t mean to leave you alone… I’ll come back to you… I’ll come back to you and Case…”

“Hey, hey, baby?” said Jiao, in Chinese. She had no idea what he was saying but he was obviously very upset and she wanted to soothe him. She brushed his hair back gently and lightly pressed her lips to his forehead, “You’re just dreaming, Déwei… You’re with me…” He smiled a soft little smile and settled a little. It was like he’d heard her.

“Wherever it is you go in your head” she said, “You can always come back to me…”

His eyes began to flutter open and he looked at her with a sort of wide-eyed confusion for a moment. It was like he didn’t know who she was or where they were. Then a look of recognition passed over him and he glanced up at the bunk above him. The kids were up there.

“It’s okay” said Jiao, “You were having a nightmare.”

He nodded a little sadly. It hadn’t been a nightmare. It was a memory. It had taken nearly 36 days to make the crossing from Australia to China. By the time they’d opened the shipping container he’d lost nearly 30kg, and despite not being able to walk from extreme weakness, he’d been raving like a lunatic. In many ways, the man that was Darryl Braxton had died in that container. He didn’t know how to be him anymore.

“You’re okay” repeated Jiao, with worry in her eyes.

He gave her a weak little smile and then softly placed his hand on her pregnant belly. She was still a few months away from her due date but they were running out of time. He knew that twins rarely went full term. ‘Brax’ was their only hope. He was the only one that could really help. He needed to be that man again; the one that had once meant something to a few people half a world away. He needed them to come through for him now. He needed them to send in the cavalry… But what if it didn’t work? What if no-one came looking for them? What would he do then?! What would 'Brax' do then?

[Red Ranger 1]

You must be in a pretty bad way to imagine your maybe-dead brother watching you go to the toilet.And indeed, to fantasise about broccoli. So, even further back in time for Brax, but where is he in the present (if anywhere)..?

[Ludub]

2 hours ago, Red Ranger 1 said:

And indeed, to fantasise about broccoli.

Haha!  I've occasionally had broccoli-cravings when I've been very low in iron! And they didn't even have to lock me up for weeks for that to happen. 

[pembie]

That last part reminded me of that song you have too search for the hero within yourself

I have had a spinach pizza once and I have can say that was something that I don't want to repeat so no daydreams about that and broccoli is evil i burn my tounge on it quite often haha

As for taking a poo in front of your brothers I have no words other than what a load of crap Brax finds himself in Yes he must be finding himself soon those dreams are tiring suffering from a lot of diarrhoea causes one's bum to feel like its on fire and that is where I will leave you to ponder on that delight

[Guest]

Great chapter

imagining your dead brother well maybe dead watching you go to the toilet.

Brax's old life seems to be catching up to him.

Update again soon

[Inactive User]

Great chapter

Looks like Brax's old life is catching up to him

Looking forwards to it

Update soon please xx

[Suzza101]

Great chapter! I loved it! 

Poor Brax looks like Braxs old life is catching up with him. and I'm pretty worried about him with seeing his brothers and Ricky. I just hope it will end well but I think that even if they do get Brax back he will be different. I can imagine that he will be so worried for all of his brothers. If he thinks that Heath is dead then he will probably think that Kyle is dead as well which means that he would have no more brothers. 

Where was Kyle. I was reading and I was so sad that Kyle wasn't mentioned    

I can't wait for the next chapter, please update soon.