Red Ranger 1

It feels like there's a lot of "excepts" here. "Since Sally's departure, there's been no returns of characters from the first 20 years except Kane and Kirsty, Pippa, Shelley, Sally, Morag, Celia, Colleen, Marilyn, Roo recast, Olivia recast, Duncan recast, Quinn recast, Martha recast technically and Dmitri." And maybe some others that I've forgotten. I certainly accept that the current show is reluctant to acknowledge its past, and there are certainly characters from that era who'd have a reason to come back, but I think there's a certain snobbishness about acting as though the characters from the first 20 years are all sacred icons and bringing back someone who only debuted 10 years ago doesn't count. It is ironic that Neighbours and Home and Away have pretty much swapped over from where they were 20 years ago: Back then Neighbours was outright saying they didn't think the current audience cared about the show's history while Home and Away was organising regular reunions of old characters. Now Home and Away is the one trying to avoid mentions of the past as much as possible (and oddly skirting around it when they do, like the recent references to Roo giving up a child for adoption), while Neighbours has gone way too far in the other direction, being run by overgrown fanboys who think bringing back a short-lived character from over 30 years ago to deliver about four lines while being virtually unrecognisable is a work of genius. I think there is an argument that Home and Away's format of a revolving door of younger characters (which they've always had) with a few stalwarts that lapsed viewers can latch onto as recognisable (six character who've been there over 10 years, with a seventh who's been there nearly 8 and none of them look like they're going anywhere) seems to have worked at keeping it in the public eye, while Neighbours has narrowly survived cancellation, been reduced to four episodes a week and relegated to streaming in most countries and seems to be being made purely for a committed minority. So, yeah, it's a shame, but we've still got a show that many people still enjoy so I won't complain too loudly.

Alf's episode count this week:Three. John's turn to not appear, I guess he's really committed to this trip to the city! I had no sympathy for Theo here. He was the one begging for pills and insisting he couldn't do an interview without them last week, so Valerie's right that he just came across as a hypocrite by, ironically, doing what she did last week and trying to insist she could cope without them.That said, I did find Valerie's spaced out behaviour afterwards rather disturbing, it was just a bit too much of a shift from the depressed state she was in before.It felt less like her coping and more like her seeking some sort of escape. I must admit I was largely on Dana's side as well.Whilst Dana is making a lot of assumptions about Maia's situation, Harper just came across as completely sanctimonious and refusing to acknowledge that some people actually are just bad parents.It was nice to fill in a few blanks about their history and the fact that they don't seem to have any family apart from each other (and surrogate mum Irene, I guess!). Meanwhile, we have chalk-and-cheese siblings number two with Felicity taking Eden's place as the resident Stevie Marlow fangirl and convincing Cash a movie night is a good idea.And it turns out she was actually right and it was useful homework! I wasn't sure how into the film he was, but for all his snark, he definitely isn't keen on cats leaping out.

You don't have Freeview? Do you have access to My5?

Thinking really hard about it, I suddenly realised that Xander's sister was stepmother to Justin's niece! It's incredibly tenuous but I kind of like the idea that, despite the show refusing to directly mention her, Jasmine is still giving little brother regular phone calls asking him to keep an eye on her old extended family...

It's hard to work out whether Tane could have avoided this if he'd been a bit less of a macho twit with Peter or whether his time as Maia's self-appointed caretaker was over the moment the press drew attention to it.It does seem like the perennially-unseen Sarge was just taking the easy option somewhat, but Tane should have known this couldn't continue forever.I'm glad Mali was supportive of Rose after she did a dirty job she didn't have to do.Even though everyone else has been quick to dismiss Dana's culpability, Tane was never going to be happy about what she did.And to be fair, Dana herself acknowledges she's at fault.Tane did seem to be softening towards her until the blows kept on coming.I'm glad Xander was there for her anyway.Not sure about Felicity's involvement.It would be nice if she and Tane could still be there for each other as friends, and I'm not sure it's particularly healthy for him to push away one of the few people in his corner, but I guess learning what she was up to last week left him worried that she's too involved in his life. We get some updates on Remi (clearly none of his friends have heard about his and Bree's split, even though Rose knows), and a mention of Tori. I'm not sure why Xander considers Leah and Justin "almost family"? (Because they're all regulars on Home and Away?) Kirby's attempt at not-so-casual conversation with Theo fell flat. Theo finds the shoe very much on the other foot after begging Valerie for a pill last week. Has she used up her stash faster than usual because of all that partying? I guess her card being declined is meant to show she's out of money.

It seemed to be the fish that was the problem... Well, she didn't acknowledge it as such, but as a lot of people feared, Roo stirring things up has simply poked the hornets' nest and caused Peter to come flying back looking for someone to sting.To be a bit fair to him, he was acting under orders seeking Tane out, but it didn't take him long to start asking confrontational questions, not that Tane was in any mood to talk no matter how reasonable he was.It was nice of Mali to offer to run the gym but he probably should have learned from his attempt at running the surf club: Luckily, Roo, who sees to work everywhere these days, was on hand to pick up the slack.Roo and Harper both seem convinced that bracelet is a big clue, Rose less so, Tane is kind of halfway between not caring and hoping it isn't. Remi finally made a fair comparison to Bree, that she wouldn't want him telling her not to surf despite the potential dangers.Bree was being annoyingly dogmatic about it and, despite saying Remi had made his choice, it seemed like he was avoiding making a choice and it was her deciding she wasn't going to date someone who rides a motorbike.It's a surprising end after how long they've been together and everything they've been through, but these things happen, I guess.I did think Remi was going to get rid of the bike when he rang Justin but (somewhat implausibly given his injuries!) he ended up riding it instead, so I suppose he's accepted the situation. I rolled my eyes a bit at Alf apologising for snapping at Marilyn.He talks to everyone like that and most of them don't warrant gushing apologies.

Does Levi ever go home? It feels like every episode he's in, he's supposed to be on his way back to Imogen, only for something to come up (usually involving Mackenzie) and him to stick around.And now he's even going away with her and I've no idea how he's going to explain that one. "Work", I guess. Stevie actually seemed pretty personable here, I guess having a fright does that to you.Cash really should have bought some stuff that was simple to cook, especially if he was going to get Stevie to do the cooking herself.She also seemed more amenable to the idea of him being replaced with another guard.Maybe she's just relieved to have someone there.Hopefully she won't take advantage of Cash being permanently on call. Well, it took more than a week for us, but maybe less time has passed for the characters: Leah's back and seems to be in a good place, going full steam ahead with the wedding.I can see why Irene and Marilyn don't want to get in the crossfire, but it might be an idea to at least phone John and let him know Justin and Leah's plans. (Oh, and maybe stress to Dana what she is and isn't meant to mention...) Remi's deception was never going to last, but he probably didn't expect it to come to an end that quickly.Still, I guess there was never going to be a good time to say "You know how I said I'd give up my bike for you? I lied."

I'm still not finding Levi particularly sympathetic and Mackenzie is coming across as rather selfish as well.It's hard to know how blind Levi's devotion to his father is and how much of it is informed by his current situation.Levi insists his father was in love with the woman he had an affair with but what does that mean? Is he still with her and happy, or was he only "in love" with her for as long as the affair lasted? They pretty much seem to have given up on being discreet too given Mackenzie's move near the end. Cash describes Stevie as high maintenance and he's got a point but she also seems to be genuinely on edge.So, apparently she's not the lead in her movie: What is she then, the serial killer? There was an element of crying wolf about Stevie's predicament.I must admit, I thought at first that she'd made up the story about Paul being poisoned to get Cash's attention, but turns out it was true, at least as far as she was aware.Looks like Eden's insistence that she trusts Cash might be tested... A lot of people have expressed concern about how involved Tane is with Maia but they probably wouldn't have taken it to the extremes that the gutter press did.Despite everyone being in a hurry to exonerate her, a lot of the blame has to lie with Dana for casually blurting out things she'd been told to keep quiet about to a stranger.Roo's got the bit between her teeth but neither Alf nor Irene seems to think her getting involved is a good idea so we'll have to see how it goes.

Alf's episode count this week:Three. Leah doesn't appear at all, with her week in the clinic apparently taking longer than expected. Well, Cash seems to have made an impression on Stevie, and not just by looking good in a suit.And turns out Eden is pretty keen on an excuse to hang around one of her idols! Still, it seems Stevie's agreement to follow all Cash's instructions hasn't lasted very long.To be honest, I'm sympathising with her a bit here at hating the idea of being locked away in a suite and not seeing anyone.It's hard to tell whether Cash is being over the top or not, but can he really keep this up indefinitely? Talking of keeping things up indefinitely...To the surprise of no-one, Mackenzie's resolve over Levi didn't take long to crumble yet again and she's soon sending him another needy text. It remains hard to see this ending well for either of them for all their claims of wanting to be with each other. It's always nice to see Alf go full Alf on an interloper, but unfortunately Dana chose the wrong person to prove a point to Xander with, and despite a previous warning from Harper, soon proved that she can rival Irene and John in the saying way too much stakes.

A very involved episode: We sometimes struggle with only a couple of storylines but there was at least four distinct plot threads in this one! Stevie is obviously someone who likes being in control and getting what she wants, which makes the fact she's at the mercy of this stalker hard for her to take: She did show a hint of vulnerability when she was left alone.Cash seemed to be being as stiff as possible in their interactions.On the one hand, walking away because Stevie refuses to do as he says doesn't really help, but on the other, I can see why he'd think there's no point if he's just going to be ignored. It had been so long that I was expecting it to be forgotten about so I was delighted to see Xander taking Mackenzie to task for the cowardly way she got Felicity to pass along her criticisms second hand.She was suitably chastened, even if she spend half the shift mooning over Levi, which is kind of how she got in this situation in the first place.I'm still unconvinced that her resolve to end things will last.I also remain bewildered at how eager Levi is to throw his life away: Is he just trying to convince himself that he's risked his marriage for something worthwhile? I can understand Bree's concerns but that ultimatum could have backfired badly and almost did.As it stands, they're in an awkwardly explosive impasse.Remi doesn't want to lose her but he doesn't want to give in to her demands either so he has settled on...pretending. I guess he's hoping that once the memory has faded and she isn't so passionate about it, he'll be able to talk Bree into letting him ride the bike again.I was surprised at the reference to Mercedes: I must admit, if it hadn't been for a BTTB article mentioning it, I'd have completely forgotten that Remi's only meant to be looking after the bike for her! John, Marilyn and Irene made a nice comedy trio with John's sudden determination to do something nice for Justin and Leah causing him to get ahead of himself.I think Irene's right: John might be a penny-pincher, but once he gets an idea in his head, it's very hard to get it out.

So yep, Kirby's gesture, while very much welcomed by Remi, went down like a lead balloon with Bree.I guess at least it's forced Bree to be honest about how she feels but ultimatums can backfire.I guess my feeling is that Bree probably has a point, but no more than she had before the accident.Motorcyclists are vulnerable but the chances of Remi having another accident are fairly remote.(Okay, I guess living in Summer Bay makes it more likely but still.) I'm assuming good intentions from Felicity here. Despite Cash seeming to assume that, I don't think she saw this as a way to win back Tane, i think it was genuinely motivated by wanting to do something for him, possibly with a bit of guilt in there.I forgot that she and Cash had been fostered, which adds another dimension to it.I think in Felicity's mind she'd foster the baby for a bit, with Tane helping out, then once Tane was approved she'd hand Maia over to him.Cash eventually found the right argument, helping her see this is a bigger commitment than she's willing to make. It really is Irene's month for putting her foot in it: First dropping Dana in it with Harper, and now dropping Leah and Justin in it with John. John was typically indiscreet but did manage to provide Justin with a decent ear afterwards.

We do get at least some insight into Tane's thought processes here: He sees it as traditional to take in and care for a baby that needs someone like that and can't really grasp the way other people see it, even with Roo trying to get him to put himself in the mother's shoes. (I assume Rose did manage to log the donations for Maia before Roo turned up at the hospital with them in the very next scene!) Felicity seems to be about the only one who can see his point of view, but then she hasn't seen as much as the others.She didn't look entirely committed while looking up foster care at the end: I think it might be the guilt talking there, given she's denied Tane one opportunity to be a parent and can now do it in another way.But really, I can't see that ending any different. Theo was absolutely pathetic here, using every trick in the book to get his next fix and, frustratingly, succeeding.I don't know what Valerie was playing at: Even from a solely self-preservation viewpoint, Leah and Justin aren't going to see any difference between her giving Theo drugs herself and helping him get them from someone else.

Tane continues to be a bit over-involved in this and the other characters don't quite seem to know how to react.It's all right saying family's everything to him, but the newly christened Maia isn't his family.And he seems to be jumping to unnecessary conclusions about the people who are, despite Harper and Rose trying to keep him grounded.Mackenzie and Mali made an attempt at airing their concerns but it fell on deaf ears, so it's probably smart for them to back off for now.Tane volunteering his services as a foster carer wasn't the worst idea in the world, although I'm not sure he fully grasped the part where he had to be ready to give her up if her family turned up. I know Valerie hasn't exactly behaved responsibly, but it does seem as though, for the most part, she's just been using the pills to get her through rough patches.Theo seems to have quickly reached the point where he needs them to do normal everyday things and, while she's not entirely selflessly motivated given her worry of people noticing, Valerie's right to cut him off.

I had to check you were right but yes, closest we get is Roo saying "my daughter".

Alf's episode count this week:Three. They obviously had to make room for him: Irene, Leah, Justin and Dana were the only other ones to make three and Marilyn didn't appear at all! Well, the other characters are expressing concern about Tane, especially Mackenzie and Mali. He is coming across as a bit...obsessed? Along with talking with authority about parenthood in the way only a non-parent can.Rose is coming across as a lot more measured, worrying about both the baby and the parent.It was good to see everyone coming together to help her:Alf, Roo and John have become quite the unit! I did like that chat between Alf and Roo, but I'm glad Roo pointed out this isn't the same thing: She didn't abandon Martha and was frantic to find her when she went missing. Valerie gets her first obligatory bikini scene! If she and Theo are trying to keep their relationship on the downlow, then kissing on the beach isn't exactly being discreet.I'm not sure how much of a point Kirby has, although I can't blame her for being concerned about what Theo's getting himself into.Valerie's defiance certainly crumbled when she saw Kirby with Rose and realised what exactly she could do if she doesn't play ball. Aside from her concern for Tane...what exactly is Mackenzie on? I mean, I don't trust Levi and I'm not entirely convinced by his offer to leave Imogen for her, which did feel a bit like him telling her what he thought she wanted to hear. But...what exactly did she want to hear? She doesn't want him to be serious about his wife, but she doesn't want him to leave her either, but she whines about not getting to see him. Frankly it's hard to take her breaking things off seriously given her track record: This must be at least the third time she's said "That's it" and in the past she's been back in his arms pretty soon after.

Those were some fairly excruciating chats between Xander and Dana. Xander was doing his best to be nice about it but didn't really manage to backtrack on the humiliation.It sounds like he actually does like her but doesn't want to ruin their friendship, and doesn't have his sister and Irene giving him "Be bold!" speeches. Dana did seem a bit more relaxed when they chatted later: Possibly she has other things on her mind but hopefully that's them on an even keel.Maybe Xander will end up getting his dog to go with the Matheson sisters' cats. Alf seemed to be trying to get John and Roo to cut it out and stop being silly but in the end had to resort to telling them the truth.I kind of wish he'd given Roo more of a serve:Instead, he settles for putting the fear of God, or rather Alf, into John and letting Roo off the hook because she gives a speech about how great he is.It's one of the unwritten rules of the show that, whenever the plot calls for it, Alf has unlimited funds at his disposal.No sign of Banjo among the bronze medallion recipients (most of whom didn't get awards or names because they're not main characters...):Guess he really has just disappeared in a throwaway line never to be seen again. After all his recent obsession with having a family, Tane has an abandoned baby drop in his lap.Guess that's Mali's night out off then.I had to smile at the crying noises being dubbed onto the perfectly content looking baby.

So...the mystery donor is Alf? That's a bit of an anti-climax after all the names we were throwing about! Oh well, at least we get the prospect of him ripping a hole in Roo and John for being a pair of flaming galahs... It was grossly unfair of Mackenzie to leave Felicity to break the news to Xander about her rejecting his idea and, it seems, him.Felicity definitely seems to be being the grown-up at the moment, once again showing that the days of her being Cash's irresponsible sister are long gone (well, you know, except when the storyline requires her to be) as she's sorted while he hasn't even got a job now. Has he ever slept this week? He seemed to come off shift, spend hours hanging around Salt with Felicity, then go back to work! Justin handled things extremely well with Leah. I don't know if we should be worried about her going back to the clinic or not: The fact it's only a week suggests it's mostly an excuse to have Leah off screen now she's done her three episodes for the week! Irene really can be a blabbermouth at times. We get some more nice sibling banter between cat ladies Harper and Dana before Harper makes the mistake of encouraging Dana on very little evidence, leading to her being humiliated.

James and Juliet?

Justin really doesn't learn, does he? He knows Leah's in a fairly fragile state but he just had to insist on going from 0 to 60, wanting to get all the wedding plans in place straightaway and shout it from the rooftops. It's a shame because Leah did seem happy, and everyone they told did seem happy for them, Irene's quiet word aside. Hopefully this wobble won't last long. Definitely Mackenzie's turn to be the grouchy and unreasonable one among the Salt owners, with Felicity, who was as amiable as she gets, getting all Mackenzie's issues dumped on her and now apparently having to disappoint Xander.And she even took time out to act as an agony aunt to a mopey Cash! Eden was a bit premature in suggesting Levi and Imogen were trying for a family, but she's obviously an admirer of Imogen and I guess just accepted her word that she'll talk Levi round eventually. I can understand Remi being concerned by Bree's u-turn. He went in a bit hard but then she was a bit defensive. Now that she's explained it I guess I understand her reasoning.

To all intents and purposes, the original Jack Sugden left at the end of 1973, after only a year. He just had a six week guest stint in 1976.

There seemed to be a touch of jealousy in Valerie and Kirby’s attitude towards each other: Neither seems particularly keen on the other having any influence over Theo. I guess time will tell whether Valerie pushing Theo to do the interview on his own turns out to be a disaster or not. Still, after backsliding a bit recently, Valerie seems to be all-in with her support of Leah and Justin again, and there doesn’t seem to be any agenda other than wanting to be a good friend to Leah. We finally meet Imogen and she seems about as nice as you can get, almost excessively so in fact, which makes Levi and Mackenzie’s dalliance seem even more hard to justify. She embraced Eden as part of the family well enough whilst managing to avoid any awkward subjects! I wondered if Remi was hiding something on that laptop but…apparently not? Bree managed to curtail her overprotective stream and let Remi out of the house and all seems well…until she gets that call.

I've heard that. I will say that I have absolutely no memory of it and I think I was paying attention and always believed that Pippa and Ian weren't married. (I'm not sure the Pauline Fowler comparison above is apt either, given she'd been Ross for, what, seven years maybe? So not exactly most of her life.) So I suspect it's yet another example of someone's faulty memory falling into the fan consciousness and being treated as fact because the episodes aren't around for us to check.

I don't think they did, although I'm sure someone will insist otherwise. She was always Pippa Ross if a surname was given in later appearances.

It's not like it was done away with completely: There's always been a Diner on the show since the concept was first introduced, so it's not that different to Neighbours burning down and rebuilding the Lassiters complex multiple times.

Episode count this week:Only Irene, Marilyn, Justin and Mali managed three episodes. I loved Cash's confusion at finding Felicity drinking Eden's coffee and the way Felicity really couldn't be doing with all this drama.Cash would, in most circumstances, have a good point that if Eden wants Levi to make an effort to see her, she should do the same.Rose's detective skills came into good effect as she worked out exactly what's got Mali bothered: All she doesn't know is what the secret about Mackenzie is. I'm kind of liking the way Cash is continuing to be an unofficial mentor for Rose as senior constable. (What happened to his shirt though? He's wearing one when he comes home but it's nowhere to be seen in that scene!) Her community service attendee was a bit of a nightmare but Rose seemed to have a positive impact in the end. (I'm also relieved that they seem to have been only weeding: Justin's "**** it in the heart" advice initially left me believing they were killing wildlife!) Nice to know that Justin has finally finished the community service which seems to have been going on about a year. I'm trying to remember how long I predicted it would take before all the breaks he's had... Somehow, John has ended up joining Roo in the ridiculous camp and decided it makes perfect sense to not spend an anonymous donation because they don't know who it's from, even though the surf club will probably go out of business without it.Sounds like Cash is still in touch with the mystery donor then...