Red Ranger 1

I don't know if I've said before that Tane had crossed a line but he definitely did here. I think by this point it's not about Maia and making sure she's looked after, it's about Tane being arrogant and entitled and thinking that because he was the one that found Maia that automatically grants him a special place in her life. And it really doesn't help that he has people like Alf egging him on and grumbling that the rules are nonsense. Roo starts the episode thinking that it'll be a breeze to look after Maia in some sort of partnership with Tane (even though they're both given warnings by people who know more about it that it might not be that simple): I wonder if she's reconsidering being a team with him after seeing just how dogmatic he can be. I think Rose handled things as well as she could, and disagree with the main site suggesting she should have arrested him before there was an AVO in place to allow it, but Tane was being utterly ridiculous thinking he could call the police's bluff and somehow seemed utterly dumbfounded that it didn't work. The offscreen-ness of Sarge is getting ever more ridiculous: Here, Rose is at the police station and she still only talks to him on the phone! Elsewhere, Theo tries some honesty with Valerie but seems too afraid of losing her to go in as hard as he perhaps should.I was actually quite pleased that Kirby was so blunt with Justin and Leah when they stormed in thinking they could fix things, which would have been just as bad even if she actually had simply been jealous.We get the odd hint that Valerie wishes she could be the person that, well, everyone already thinks she is, as in the scene where she acknowledges Leah actually has got it together.I know the therapy doesn't seem to have done her much good, but maybe if she tried it without falling back on the drugs every time things get difficult? But the promo suggests she still doesn't get it.

To be fair, Roo probably hasn't seen Pippa since 1989 and they were never especially close, so I doubt she's on her speed dial!

I don't know about that. Remember what a nightmare Theo was when he first turned up? Felicity's got better since the early days as well, and more recently they've given Harper and Dana a home and shelter when they needed one. I suppose you could count Bree too, given what a nightmare her life was before she came there.

Alf's episode count this week:Four. Rose was only in one and Mackenzie and Kirby didn't appear at all.The only ones to manage three were Irene, Leah, Justin and Eden. Well, there was a lot of back and forth from Roo there, with Tane pulling her one way and Alf pulling her the other.I just really wish we'd had a mention of Maddy: Sure, she wasn't a baby, but Roo took her in and loved her like a daughter and let go when it was time for her to move on.Despite Felicity's words, I do wonder if Roo has thought this through because she seems to be making the exact same mistake as Felicity did, assuming she can just step in and do this and then hand the baby over to Tane, when there are a lot more variables in place. Felicity was definitely in force of nature mode here: Maybe people should stop having them conferences in Salt if they don't want her getting wind of things! Barging in and disrupting the increasingly irritating Bree's wallowing was most welcome! Whilst she did seem to have a pretty good handle on things herself, I'm glad that she ignored Mackenzie's tantrum and put Xander back in charge. Theo and Valerie really do seem to have swapped over now: Not so long ago, he was the one dependent on the pills to get through things and she was the one advising him to use them in moderation, now she's the one that seems to be permanently high and he's the one wondering if things are going too far.Valerie continues to feel like her life in Summer Bay could come to an end just like that, and since she's not a regular she could well be right...which is a shame because she's exactly the sort of messed up youngster who seems to be a good person deep down that could use this town's healing touch.

I didn't think Alf was being fair on anyone here.I get that he's worried about Roo running herself ragged being glued to Maia's side at the hospital, but his solution is to have Tane go back to doing it instead, which isn't really a solution at all.And his way of trying to achieve it is to harass Rose over a decision she didn't make and doesn't have the power to change:Why not go and see the mysterious Sarge about it rather than putting it all on the police officer he knows?There was at least an attempt to be sensible by trying to find a foster carer for Maia, but Alf didn't really go far with it and probably isn't happy with Tane's solution... I like that Mali continues to be supportive of Rose, and also that Felicity was a grown-up about it and didn't have a go. Well, that was Levi's plans to resume his time holed up with Mackenzie scuppered, as he instead has to hang out with Eden until finally having to go home for the first time in about three weeks.There's still that lingering feeling that Mackenzie might have been the reason Eden and Levi reconnected but she's also going to be the reason why they fall out again.

John actually did ask Alf to take part! I was expecting a silent glare until John got the hint and left, but in fact, it was Alf that got out of there as fast as possible! Then Xander and Dana get roped in, and I'm guessing Alf explained to them that they weren't actually getting married off screen. John did a decent job, so it's a bit of a shame that Leah and Justin knocked him back, but it is their choice.We get an oblique reference to Theo being away: Are he and Valerie still at wherever they went instead of the clinic? I assumed they were only going to be gone a few hours! Bree pretty much showed that Remi's better off without her: That rant at Justin was very out of line and deserved a proper apology, not a beep-beep. And she doesn't even have the self-awareness to realise that "throwing away a relationship over a motorbike" applies equally to her. Not that Remi came across any better. Levi might be a terrible husband but I loved his blunt bedside manner to Remi.Going to Reefton Lakes is a decent compromise...if rather unnecessary, given that Bree seems to be hiding away as much as him.Levi seemed to mix a big dollop of truth into the story he told Eden, pretty much admitting his marriage is in trouble. Seems like Roo has replaced Tane in every way, gluing herself to Maia's bedside!

I think Justin was talking about the fact Brody isn't around to help in the build-up to the wedding, not whether or not he'll be at the ceremony. Mind you, Theo was nowhere to be seen in the preparations today! It was rather funny that Leah and Justin had diametrically opposing ideas to whether or not Salt was the ideal venue.Meanwhile, John's back in town (his claim to have been gone a week made a bit more sense than Irene saying it had only been a couple of days!) and desperately looking for couples (or indeed anyone) for him to practice his magic celebrant skills on: Who would he have asked to be groom if Irene had said yes, Alf?! I can see why people would find John irritating but I found that scene of him going full steam ahead on detailing his plans to a slack-jawed Leah and Justin utterly hilarious. I think it's the fact that his heart is in the right place and he genuinely thinks he's giving them a wonderful gift that they're going to love which makes me willing to be carried along with his insanity. It was mentioned that Stevie's agent forwarded the package which was given to them by persons unknown, so presumably whoever dropped it off at the door was genuine and...just a bit shy? I don't know what it says about my priorities that I really didn't want Cash to do too much damage to the cute teddy bear... We hear that Stevie isn't actually in the film she was going to the premiere of, which I guess explains her reference to a lead actress who isn't her a while back. A shame they didn't make it and we get a little hint of back story for her too. Remi's back sans bike: I really don't see why Eden couldn't have fitted it in the back of the van, unless she was doing it deliberately? It's hard to tell what his attitude is with Bree. Does he regret his decision and feel it's too late to go back? Does he think that if they did get back together, sooner or later Bree would start dictating terms again? He seemed to be trying to prove something with his impromptu weight listing and failed, but it's got Eden asking questions of Levi again, who really does need to start coming up with more varied excuses!

I feel like Valerie's got a lot of insecurities and, except for the drugs, I think she and Theo actually could be good for each other.That is a pretty big "except" though, and the fact they've been enabling each other isn't good.I'm not sure how I feel about Valerie lying about going to the clinic, it did seem like Leah kept pushing the issue until she heard the answer she wanted.Anyway, for all Valerie's paranoia, Leah and Justin seem happy about them being together, although that will probably change if/when they get the whole story! Brody gets a mention, but Theo is the obvious candidate among the current cast for being Justin's best man and he kind of justified it. Sorry, Roo's now glued to Maia's bedside? I mean, I guess it explains when she's not in an episode, but what happened to only medical and social staff being allowed near her? I could understand Harper and Dana stepping up, since they're the only ones that qualify, but how does Roo fit in? Are we to assume that the hospital staff (and Rose) have just decided to turn a blind eye and ignore Sarge's diktats? (After all, none of them minded Tane being there.) Anyway, Dana tried to be a bit more practical but there were big holes in her plan. Rose turns out to be the latest Death Throes fan: I guess Cash really is the only person in the world who isn't! And his lack of showbiz knowledge means he's behind again, as everyone just assumes he knows another castmember died. A camera hidden in a teddy bear: The stalker isn't Robert Robertson, is it?!

Maybe it's because I've never been a huge Marilyn fan (or a fan of her and Donald together) but I found it completely in character, and I think it definitely adds an extra layer to her obsessiveness with having a baby, both during that second stint and during more recent years, to know that she had a child out there who she'd chosen to cut off and pretend didn't exist and that she was trying to bury those feelings by focusing on some second chance at motherhood.

It feels like there's a lot of "excepts" here. "Since Sally's departure, there's been no returns of characters from the first 20 years except Kane and Kirsty, Pippa, Shelley, Sally, Morag, Celia, Colleen, Marilyn, Roo recast, Olivia recast, Duncan recast, Quinn recast, Martha recast technically and Dmitri." And maybe some others that I've forgotten. I certainly accept that the current show is reluctant to acknowledge its past, and there are certainly characters from that era who'd have a reason to come back, but I think there's a certain snobbishness about acting as though the characters from the first 20 years are all sacred icons and bringing back someone who only debuted 10 years ago doesn't count. It is ironic that Neighbours and Home and Away have pretty much swapped over from where they were 20 years ago: Back then Neighbours was outright saying they didn't think the current audience cared about the show's history while Home and Away was organising regular reunions of old characters. Now Home and Away is the one trying to avoid mentions of the past as much as possible (and oddly skirting around it when they do, like the recent references to Roo giving up a child for adoption), while Neighbours has gone way too far in the other direction, being run by overgrown fanboys who think bringing back a short-lived character from over 30 years ago to deliver about four lines while being virtually unrecognisable is a work of genius. I think there is an argument that Home and Away's format of a revolving door of younger characters (which they've always had) with a few stalwarts that lapsed viewers can latch onto as recognisable (six character who've been there over 10 years, with a seventh who's been there nearly 8 and none of them look like they're going anywhere) seems to have worked at keeping it in the public eye, while Neighbours has narrowly survived cancellation, been reduced to four episodes a week and relegated to streaming in most countries and seems to be being made purely for a committed minority. So, yeah, it's a shame, but we've still got a show that many people still enjoy so I won't complain too loudly.

Alf's episode count this week:Three. John's turn to not appear, I guess he's really committed to this trip to the city! I had no sympathy for Theo here. He was the one begging for pills and insisting he couldn't do an interview without them last week, so Valerie's right that he just came across as a hypocrite by, ironically, doing what she did last week and trying to insist she could cope without them.That said, I did find Valerie's spaced out behaviour afterwards rather disturbing, it was just a bit too much of a shift from the depressed state she was in before.It felt less like her coping and more like her seeking some sort of escape. I must admit I was largely on Dana's side as well.Whilst Dana is making a lot of assumptions about Maia's situation, Harper just came across as completely sanctimonious and refusing to acknowledge that some people actually are just bad parents.It was nice to fill in a few blanks about their history and the fact that they don't seem to have any family apart from each other (and surrogate mum Irene, I guess!). Meanwhile, we have chalk-and-cheese siblings number two with Felicity taking Eden's place as the resident Stevie Marlow fangirl and convincing Cash a movie night is a good idea.And it turns out she was actually right and it was useful homework! I wasn't sure how into the film he was, but for all his snark, he definitely isn't keen on cats leaping out.

You don't have Freeview? Do you have access to My5?

Thinking really hard about it, I suddenly realised that Xander's sister was stepmother to Justin's niece! It's incredibly tenuous but I kind of like the idea that, despite the show refusing to directly mention her, Jasmine is still giving little brother regular phone calls asking him to keep an eye on her old extended family...

It's hard to work out whether Tane could have avoided this if he'd been a bit less of a macho twit with Peter or whether his time as Maia's self-appointed caretaker was over the moment the press drew attention to it.It does seem like the perennially-unseen Sarge was just taking the easy option somewhat, but Tane should have known this couldn't continue forever.I'm glad Mali was supportive of Rose after she did a dirty job she didn't have to do.Even though everyone else has been quick to dismiss Dana's culpability, Tane was never going to be happy about what she did.And to be fair, Dana herself acknowledges she's at fault.Tane did seem to be softening towards her until the blows kept on coming.I'm glad Xander was there for her anyway.Not sure about Felicity's involvement.It would be nice if she and Tane could still be there for each other as friends, and I'm not sure it's particularly healthy for him to push away one of the few people in his corner, but I guess learning what she was up to last week left him worried that she's too involved in his life. We get some updates on Remi (clearly none of his friends have heard about his and Bree's split, even though Rose knows), and a mention of Tori. I'm not sure why Xander considers Leah and Justin "almost family"? (Because they're all regulars on Home and Away?) Kirby's attempt at not-so-casual conversation with Theo fell flat. Theo finds the shoe very much on the other foot after begging Valerie for a pill last week. Has she used up her stash faster than usual because of all that partying? I guess her card being declined is meant to show she's out of money.

It seemed to be the fish that was the problem... Well, she didn't acknowledge it as such, but as a lot of people feared, Roo stirring things up has simply poked the hornets' nest and caused Peter to come flying back looking for someone to sting.To be a bit fair to him, he was acting under orders seeking Tane out, but it didn't take him long to start asking confrontational questions, not that Tane was in any mood to talk no matter how reasonable he was.It was nice of Mali to offer to run the gym but he probably should have learned from his attempt at running the surf club: Luckily, Roo, who sees to work everywhere these days, was on hand to pick up the slack.Roo and Harper both seem convinced that bracelet is a big clue, Rose less so, Tane is kind of halfway between not caring and hoping it isn't. Remi finally made a fair comparison to Bree, that she wouldn't want him telling her not to surf despite the potential dangers.Bree was being annoyingly dogmatic about it and, despite saying Remi had made his choice, it seemed like he was avoiding making a choice and it was her deciding she wasn't going to date someone who rides a motorbike.It's a surprising end after how long they've been together and everything they've been through, but these things happen, I guess.I did think Remi was going to get rid of the bike when he rang Justin but (somewhat implausibly given his injuries!) he ended up riding it instead, so I suppose he's accepted the situation. I rolled my eyes a bit at Alf apologising for snapping at Marilyn.He talks to everyone like that and most of them don't warrant gushing apologies.

Does Levi ever go home? It feels like every episode he's in, he's supposed to be on his way back to Imogen, only for something to come up (usually involving Mackenzie) and him to stick around.And now he's even going away with her and I've no idea how he's going to explain that one. "Work", I guess. Stevie actually seemed pretty personable here, I guess having a fright does that to you.Cash really should have bought some stuff that was simple to cook, especially if he was going to get Stevie to do the cooking herself.She also seemed more amenable to the idea of him being replaced with another guard.Maybe she's just relieved to have someone there.Hopefully she won't take advantage of Cash being permanently on call. Well, it took more than a week for us, but maybe less time has passed for the characters: Leah's back and seems to be in a good place, going full steam ahead with the wedding.I can see why Irene and Marilyn don't want to get in the crossfire, but it might be an idea to at least phone John and let him know Justin and Leah's plans. (Oh, and maybe stress to Dana what she is and isn't meant to mention...) Remi's deception was never going to last, but he probably didn't expect it to come to an end that quickly.Still, I guess there was never going to be a good time to say "You know how I said I'd give up my bike for you? I lied."

I'm still not finding Levi particularly sympathetic and Mackenzie is coming across as rather selfish as well.It's hard to know how blind Levi's devotion to his father is and how much of it is informed by his current situation.Levi insists his father was in love with the woman he had an affair with but what does that mean? Is he still with her and happy, or was he only "in love" with her for as long as the affair lasted? They pretty much seem to have given up on being discreet too given Mackenzie's move near the end. Cash describes Stevie as high maintenance and he's got a point but she also seems to be genuinely on edge.So, apparently she's not the lead in her movie: What is she then, the serial killer? There was an element of crying wolf about Stevie's predicament.I must admit, I thought at first that she'd made up the story about Paul being poisoned to get Cash's attention, but turns out it was true, at least as far as she was aware.Looks like Eden's insistence that she trusts Cash might be tested... A lot of people have expressed concern about how involved Tane is with Maia but they probably wouldn't have taken it to the extremes that the gutter press did.Despite everyone being in a hurry to exonerate her, a lot of the blame has to lie with Dana for casually blurting out things she'd been told to keep quiet about to a stranger.Roo's got the bit between her teeth but neither Alf nor Irene seems to think her getting involved is a good idea so we'll have to see how it goes.

Alf's episode count this week:Three. Leah doesn't appear at all, with her week in the clinic apparently taking longer than expected. Well, Cash seems to have made an impression on Stevie, and not just by looking good in a suit.And turns out Eden is pretty keen on an excuse to hang around one of her idols! Still, it seems Stevie's agreement to follow all Cash's instructions hasn't lasted very long.To be honest, I'm sympathising with her a bit here at hating the idea of being locked away in a suite and not seeing anyone.It's hard to tell whether Cash is being over the top or not, but can he really keep this up indefinitely? Talking of keeping things up indefinitely...To the surprise of no-one, Mackenzie's resolve over Levi didn't take long to crumble yet again and she's soon sending him another needy text. It remains hard to see this ending well for either of them for all their claims of wanting to be with each other. It's always nice to see Alf go full Alf on an interloper, but unfortunately Dana chose the wrong person to prove a point to Xander with, and despite a previous warning from Harper, soon proved that she can rival Irene and John in the saying way too much stakes.

A very involved episode: We sometimes struggle with only a couple of storylines but there was at least four distinct plot threads in this one! Stevie is obviously someone who likes being in control and getting what she wants, which makes the fact she's at the mercy of this stalker hard for her to take: She did show a hint of vulnerability when she was left alone.Cash seemed to be being as stiff as possible in their interactions.On the one hand, walking away because Stevie refuses to do as he says doesn't really help, but on the other, I can see why he'd think there's no point if he's just going to be ignored. It had been so long that I was expecting it to be forgotten about so I was delighted to see Xander taking Mackenzie to task for the cowardly way she got Felicity to pass along her criticisms second hand.She was suitably chastened, even if she spend half the shift mooning over Levi, which is kind of how she got in this situation in the first place.I'm still unconvinced that her resolve to end things will last.I also remain bewildered at how eager Levi is to throw his life away: Is he just trying to convince himself that he's risked his marriage for something worthwhile? I can understand Bree's concerns but that ultimatum could have backfired badly and almost did.As it stands, they're in an awkwardly explosive impasse.Remi doesn't want to lose her but he doesn't want to give in to her demands either so he has settled on...pretending. I guess he's hoping that once the memory has faded and she isn't so passionate about it, he'll be able to talk Bree into letting him ride the bike again.I was surprised at the reference to Mercedes: I must admit, if it hadn't been for a BTTB article mentioning it, I'd have completely forgotten that Remi's only meant to be looking after the bike for her! John, Marilyn and Irene made a nice comedy trio with John's sudden determination to do something nice for Justin and Leah causing him to get ahead of himself.I think Irene's right: John might be a penny-pincher, but once he gets an idea in his head, it's very hard to get it out.

So yep, Kirby's gesture, while very much welcomed by Remi, went down like a lead balloon with Bree.I guess at least it's forced Bree to be honest about how she feels but ultimatums can backfire.I guess my feeling is that Bree probably has a point, but no more than she had before the accident.Motorcyclists are vulnerable but the chances of Remi having another accident are fairly remote.(Okay, I guess living in Summer Bay makes it more likely but still.) I'm assuming good intentions from Felicity here. Despite Cash seeming to assume that, I don't think she saw this as a way to win back Tane, i think it was genuinely motivated by wanting to do something for him, possibly with a bit of guilt in there.I forgot that she and Cash had been fostered, which adds another dimension to it.I think in Felicity's mind she'd foster the baby for a bit, with Tane helping out, then once Tane was approved she'd hand Maia over to him.Cash eventually found the right argument, helping her see this is a bigger commitment than she's willing to make. It really is Irene's month for putting her foot in it: First dropping Dana in it with Harper, and now dropping Leah and Justin in it with John. John was typically indiscreet but did manage to provide Justin with a decent ear afterwards.

We do get at least some insight into Tane's thought processes here: He sees it as traditional to take in and care for a baby that needs someone like that and can't really grasp the way other people see it, even with Roo trying to get him to put himself in the mother's shoes. (I assume Rose did manage to log the donations for Maia before Roo turned up at the hospital with them in the very next scene!) Felicity seems to be about the only one who can see his point of view, but then she hasn't seen as much as the others.She didn't look entirely committed while looking up foster care at the end: I think it might be the guilt talking there, given she's denied Tane one opportunity to be a parent and can now do it in another way.But really, I can't see that ending any different. Theo was absolutely pathetic here, using every trick in the book to get his next fix and, frustratingly, succeeding.I don't know what Valerie was playing at: Even from a solely self-preservation viewpoint, Leah and Justin aren't going to see any difference between her giving Theo drugs herself and helping him get them from someone else.

Tane continues to be a bit over-involved in this and the other characters don't quite seem to know how to react.It's all right saying family's everything to him, but the newly christened Maia isn't his family.And he seems to be jumping to unnecessary conclusions about the people who are, despite Harper and Rose trying to keep him grounded.Mackenzie and Mali made an attempt at airing their concerns but it fell on deaf ears, so it's probably smart for them to back off for now.Tane volunteering his services as a foster carer wasn't the worst idea in the world, although I'm not sure he fully grasped the part where he had to be ready to give her up if her family turned up. I know Valerie hasn't exactly behaved responsibly, but it does seem as though, for the most part, she's just been using the pills to get her through rough patches.Theo seems to have quickly reached the point where he needs them to do normal everyday things and, while she's not entirely selflessly motivated given her worry of people noticing, Valerie's right to cut him off.

I had to check you were right but yes, closest we get is Roo saying "my daughter".

Alf's episode count this week:Three. They obviously had to make room for him: Irene, Leah, Justin and Dana were the only other ones to make three and Marilyn didn't appear at all! Well, the other characters are expressing concern about Tane, especially Mackenzie and Mali. He is coming across as a bit...obsessed? Along with talking with authority about parenthood in the way only a non-parent can.Rose is coming across as a lot more measured, worrying about both the baby and the parent.It was good to see everyone coming together to help her:Alf, Roo and John have become quite the unit! I did like that chat between Alf and Roo, but I'm glad Roo pointed out this isn't the same thing: She didn't abandon Martha and was frantic to find her when she went missing. Valerie gets her first obligatory bikini scene! If she and Theo are trying to keep their relationship on the downlow, then kissing on the beach isn't exactly being discreet.I'm not sure how much of a point Kirby has, although I can't blame her for being concerned about what Theo's getting himself into.Valerie's defiance certainly crumbled when she saw Kirby with Rose and realised what exactly she could do if she doesn't play ball. Aside from her concern for Tane...what exactly is Mackenzie on? I mean, I don't trust Levi and I'm not entirely convinced by his offer to leave Imogen for her, which did feel a bit like him telling her what he thought she wanted to hear. But...what exactly did she want to hear? She doesn't want him to be serious about his wife, but she doesn't want him to leave her either, but she whines about not getting to see him. Frankly it's hard to take her breaking things off seriously given her track record: This must be at least the third time she's said "That's it" and in the past she's been back in his arms pretty soon after.

Those were some fairly excruciating chats between Xander and Dana. Xander was doing his best to be nice about it but didn't really manage to backtrack on the humiliation.It sounds like he actually does like her but doesn't want to ruin their friendship, and doesn't have his sister and Irene giving him "Be bold!" speeches. Dana did seem a bit more relaxed when they chatted later: Possibly she has other things on her mind but hopefully that's them on an even keel.Maybe Xander will end up getting his dog to go with the Matheson sisters' cats. Alf seemed to be trying to get John and Roo to cut it out and stop being silly but in the end had to resort to telling them the truth.I kind of wish he'd given Roo more of a serve:Instead, he settles for putting the fear of God, or rather Alf, into John and letting Roo off the hook because she gives a speech about how great he is.It's one of the unwritten rules of the show that, whenever the plot calls for it, Alf has unlimited funds at his disposal.No sign of Banjo among the bronze medallion recipients (most of whom didn't get awards or names because they're not main characters...):Guess he really has just disappeared in a throwaway line never to be seen again. After all his recent obsession with having a family, Tane has an abandoned baby drop in his lap.Guess that's Mali's night out off then.I had to smile at the crying noises being dubbed onto the perfectly content looking baby.