Red Ranger 1

I think I'd probably have to say something from that late 90s period that hasn't been shown since original broadcast. If pushed, I think I'd probably go for the Peter Moss storyline, which was one of Sally's biggest teen storylines and a classic case of Home and Away managing to do weird well. (And which the 7Two repeats stopped just before...)

What the hell is Mali's problem? He was utterly odious here and I really wish Mackenzie and Rose had reined him in more than they did. He's pleasingly had Rose's back when she's had to take action against Tane before, accepting she was just doing her job, and now that Tane actually has done something to warrant the police going after him (and pretty much proved Sarge and Dodgy Journalist Peter right to characterise his attachment to Poppy, as I guess we now have to call her, as toxic), Mali has suddenly snapped into some childish "police bad" mentality. Is he seriously arguing that it's okay to go around kidnapping children if you don't hurt them? I'm not even sure he was right to demand a warrant: Mackenzie's the lease holder and she'd given permission, do the police really need to ask everyone that lives there? And having thrown down the gauntlet like that, is he seriously going to throw a tantrum when Rose does exactly what he demanded she do? What was he expecting, that she'd just go "Oh, okay, I won't try and find the kidnapped baby if it upsets you so much"? If she's treating Tane like dirt, it's because he's behaved like dirt. Dana wasn't much better, with her constant whining like she's the victim, not helped by Harper and Xander enabling her with "You couldn't have known it would happen" nonsense. I wonder if she's told Xander the same half-truths she told Harper, because his "Tane shouldn't have put you in that position" stuff suggests he's ignorant of the fact that she was the one yapping around Tane like a puppy trying to get him to be her friend again and it was all her idea to break the AVO. Harper gave her a serve at the end, but I wonder if she'd do it if it wasn't behind closed doors. Then again, maybe having to sit across from Sonia and realise how much she'll be devastated if Tane's stolen her chance to be a parent from her rammed home just how much harm they've caused. Whilst it's not entirely clear, I'm guessing Poppy was born in Perth and that's why Rose couldn't find her registered locally. It's always amusing when Felicity has to try and be the grown-up despite really not being suited to it, and here she manages to muff up big time by trying to force Xander and Bree together only for Bree to decide she's going to avoid Xander even more. The one thing Mali got right was that it would be better if Levi just disappeared but nope, we couldn't be that lucky, and he and Mackenzie are back in their "We want to be together but instead of doing that we're going to sneak around behind his wife's back" holding pattern.

Alf's episode count this week:Two. Harper was only in one, although she was credited on Tuesday for no appearance. What on earth was Dana thinking? I mean, I get that she feels guilty over the fact she was partly responsible for Tane being banned from seeing Maia, but helping him break an AVO was daft. And then she goes beyond daft: She stands there watching Roo like a hawk while she's saying goodbye, then wanders off and leaves Tane, who is a lot less accepting of the situation, alone with Maia (and seemingly with no way of seeing if anyone leaves the room, so I don't want her keeping watch was meant to entail). If Tane had crossed a line before by ignoring police instructions, he's definitely crossed several now.And of course, it comes right as one of Rose's pleas has finally hit the spot and they've found the baby's mother, meaning Tane has chosen to deprive her of two safe and loving homes out of selfishness. Justin is not doing much better than Dana in the rational thinking state.He criticises Kirby for keeping Theo's drug taking to herself and then proceeds to do the same himself, even with Theo and Valerie having chosen that moment to disappear into thin air to avoid the fallout (and also because they've used up their episodes this week). I'm glad Irene gave John some words of encouragement, which makes up for her snide "This course is more trouble than it's worth" attitude last episode.I know Leah and Justin set the wedding date for a month's time at one point but I completely forget how much time has passed since then!

Wasn't he talking to John, or have I forgotten something? It might have been smart for Justin and John to make absolutely certain John could get his credentials in time before hiring him as celebrant: Looks like it's going to be a bit tight! That aside, I thought Irene needed to tone down the judgement, since it's nothing to do with her if Justin wants John to do the ceremony.Leah's reputation clearly precedes her as she rings around trying desperately to get information from someone.(Another name drop for Tori, but she won't confirm if she's coming to the ceremony.)This being Home and Away, Marilyn's tarot card reading is very prescient, with Valerie squirming.Theo seems to have snapped back to only being involved with drugs to keep Valerie's trust, after seeming a more-or-less equal participant last episode.As tends to be the way with these things, the Theo/Valerie/Kirby showdown built up in the promo just kind of fizzled out, but it seems to have led to Kirby going to Justin. Dana's enthusiasm in contrast to John being his usual laconic self was quite fun.The photo of Stevie and Remi gets belatedly deleted, too late to stop Bree finding out.To be a bit fair to her, she doesn't know about Dana's lingering crush on Xander, but it was still fairly off to just plant a kiss on him like that and he was right to give her a telling off.

Cash's panic quickly turned to fury once he realised exactly where Stevie had gone.Felicity was in the odd position of trying to give Stevie some words of wisdom...although I noticed she quickly ignored Cash's instruction to not take her eyes off Stevie! Stevie did at least seem to back down a bit when she realised how worried Cash had been about her.Cash did volunteer to take part in her audition tape:I'd love to see that one! Xander thought he was being a good friend showing Bree the photo but ironically, if he hadn't, she might not have seen it before Remi got Stevie to take it down. As many predicted, Leah is finding it hard to maintain her hands-off role with the wedding! Theo and Valerie's character arcs are completely messed up at this point.It started with Valerie giving Theo pills, then Theo was demanding more while Valerie thought they should ease up, then Valerie wanted more while Theo was trying to get her to stop, then Theo was only taking the pills to keep her trust, and now they're both desperate for more pills to the point of conning money out of Justin? I give up.

Well, Stevie seems to have found another attraction of staying in Summer Bay! I'm guessing that there was more to the audition than what we saw, especially since the line she kept reciting wasn't in the bit they did. (They, perhaps fortunately, didn't seem to be recording either.) I liked Felicity trying her best to enthusiastically volunteer herself as a scene partner. (Would she have been keen to do a romantic scene with Stevie if Stevie hadn't shut it down?) I still have no idea what Levi and Mackenzie want. Do they want to be together but not yet? Do they want to spend the rest of their lives sneaking around? Do they think this affair will fizzle out eventually? When Levi made that big speech about not wanting to hurt his wife, I was left wondering how exactly he thinks that's going to work. Oh well, seems like Imogen has a few days with him coming up, provided he doesn't go back on it.

Well, that was a very uncomfortable dinner for Levi at least, even without the elephant known as Mackenzie literally in the room. In the past, he’s apparently been keen to keep up appearances with Imogen but he couldn’t bring himself to try that hard here. Mackenzie’s assessment that he loves Imogen but it’s different to what they have is a way of thinking about it, I guess. Mackenzie’s curiosity got the better of her although she seemed to save Eden from an awkward talk! Tane hit a new level of annoying here: He’s been banging on for ages about wanting Maia to have a proper home, and now it’s going to happen, he thinks they need his personal approval? I’m glad Alf (among others) told him to pull his head in. I’m not quite sure why Rose got chosen to break the news when he’d probably have taken it (slightly) better from Harper. But, okay, fair play to him for apologising to them both and accepting the situation even if he doesn’t like it. Roo took the news quite well: She’s disappointed but she knew it was a possibility.

Sounds like quite a good episode, actually.

It depends what you mean by "in any way". Do I think they'll do a self-indulgent episode bringing back any actor that's desperate enough for work to reprise a role they played 40 years ago? No. But I think there'll be some acknowledgement of the anniversary, even if it's not in the show itself. "Its whole existence" is a sweeping statement that doesn't even come close to standing up to close scrutiny. Periods of ignoring the past and, perhaps even worse, the current continuity porn attitude of coming up with retcons of past events that seem designed to annoy everyone who actually does respect the show's past. (Honestly, Home and Away deciding Alf's first wife is still alive is nothing compared to Neighbours constantly rewriting the Robinson family history.)

What does that even mean? And if you don't know, why are you apparently endorsing it by "reposting" it?

Alf's episode count this week:Two. A rather eventful fundraiser then.I'm not sure why Remi convinced himself that Levi was into Bree, he looked up absolutely terrified of her. Mind you, it's kind of ironic that Remi has got the right idea but the wrong woman.Despite Eden suggesting Remi and Bree had a proper goodbye, he seemed determined to get in one last dig at her although he had the point that she expects him to change when she's not willing to.Also ironic that his pointed remarks have led to Eden doing the last thing Levi wanted! Rose seems to have worn out Mali's patience by sequestering herself away at work finding new wild goose chases. Still, at least her chat with Kirby gave us an insight into why it's so important to her.Felicity making knowing comments about the anonymous donor didn't really help things.Harper has good news for Maia, time to see if Tane can put his money where his mouth is about wanting her to be looked after properly. Mackenzie kind of managed to apologise to Xander: She wasn't any more attentive than the last time but I think he's accepted it's the best he's going to get.Did Levi buy that boat trip for them? How's he going to explain that one to Alf?

Felicity was in full-on force of nature mode again. I loved that moment where Cash and Stevie just stood there and waited for the penny to drop that there was a famous actress standing in her kitchen.It's good that Stevie didn't mind Felicity's rather intense fangirling and they actually bonded over being the high maintenance thorns in Cash's side.Cash is actually working extremely well as a kind of deadpan straight man.Then Felicity goes round to Mackenzie, completely oblivious to the fact that she's in the middle of her latest liaison, and ends up in full hurricane until Mackenzie just has to give in. Despite that, Felicity did her best to give Remi and Bree the benefit of her break-up experience but Remi was too busy getting sore with Eden for telling her things that are going to be public record sooner or later anyway.So, we get to see the other Lyrik duo in action, after they seem to have let Theo and Kirby do all the work so far this season! I did wonder about claims Rose would be at the fundraiser given she's already done two episodes this week, but maybe she'll turn up tomorrow.

Leah has officially entered bridezilla mode with even her friends commenting on it and Marilyn experiencing first hand just how dismissive of anyone's ideas she can be.It remains to be seen how long she can stick to her decision to back right off and let Justin organise a surprise wedding for her.Still, it's given Justin the green light to give John the green light! John says Leah and Justin are his two closest friends: I notice he waited until Irene and Marilyn were out of earshot! Eden's looking forward to three days straight of, ahem, quality time but had forgotten about Cash's inability to switch off.I guess she was right when she spoke to Levi about being in a relationship with someone you hardly see! It was perhaps inevitable that Cash would offer Stevie a bed if all else fails. I wonder how Felicity will react; Eden was a big fan of Stevie until she started taking up too much of her boyfriend's time! (And a reference to the fact that Cash's safe house never has the door locked...)

I'm not feeling much sympathy for Tane here. His constant refrain of "Maia needs me" is coming across as rather delusional, as if he thinks that because he found her, that means he has some entitled right to have automatic access to her.Maybe we are dealing with cultural differences, but this is increasingly about him, not Maia. "Why am I being treated like the bad guy?"he complains.Er, because you decided to start a fight at Maia's bedside? Roo and Dana giving Rose attitude doesn't help in the slightest. It probably wasn't the smartest move for Theo to tell Kirby about Valerie's brother, which has caused her insecurities to come to the fore again.No matter how much Leah tries to reassure her that they consider her part of the family, she's still convinced they'll kick her out.She doesn't seem to realise that the drugs are going to be the biggest deal-breaker, not whether or not she's dating Theo.I guess by her twisted logic, dragging Theo back into that world means he can't go against her.I get that Theo was backed into a corner and probably worried she'd start packing her bags again if he said no, but I think he should have drawn a line at that point and refused the pill. I think Justin and Leah are as bad as each other when it comes to the wedding planning: They both seem to have very definite ideas, and it's not like Leah's bringing much to the table other than a lot of negativity.I like that Dana is one of the few people who's whole-heartedly supportive of John, but I think he took her advice the wrong way here by barging in on Leah and Justin. And I thought Leah was too harsh on Justin for basically doing what she was telling him to.

^Ha! It did cross my mind that she was thinking "Well, when Sally got married..." at that point but I forgot to mention it!

I don't know if I've said before that Tane had crossed a line but he definitely did here. I think by this point it's not about Maia and making sure she's looked after, it's about Tane being arrogant and entitled and thinking that because he was the one that found Maia that automatically grants him a special place in her life. And it really doesn't help that he has people like Alf egging him on and grumbling that the rules are nonsense. Roo starts the episode thinking that it'll be a breeze to look after Maia in some sort of partnership with Tane (even though they're both given warnings by people who know more about it that it might not be that simple): I wonder if she's reconsidering being a team with him after seeing just how dogmatic he can be. I think Rose handled things as well as she could, and disagree with the main site suggesting she should have arrested him before there was an AVO in place to allow it, but Tane was being utterly ridiculous thinking he could call the police's bluff and somehow seemed utterly dumbfounded that it didn't work. The offscreen-ness of Sarge is getting ever more ridiculous: Here, Rose is at the police station and she still only talks to him on the phone! Elsewhere, Theo tries some honesty with Valerie but seems too afraid of losing her to go in as hard as he perhaps should.I was actually quite pleased that Kirby was so blunt with Justin and Leah when they stormed in thinking they could fix things, which would have been just as bad even if she actually had simply been jealous.We get the odd hint that Valerie wishes she could be the person that, well, everyone already thinks she is, as in the scene where she acknowledges Leah actually has got it together.I know the therapy doesn't seem to have done her much good, but maybe if she tried it without falling back on the drugs every time things get difficult? But the promo suggests she still doesn't get it.

To be fair, Roo probably hasn't seen Pippa since 1989 and they were never especially close, so I doubt she's on her speed dial!

I don't know about that. Remember what a nightmare Theo was when he first turned up? Felicity's got better since the early days as well, and more recently they've given Harper and Dana a home and shelter when they needed one. I suppose you could count Bree too, given what a nightmare her life was before she came there.

Alf's episode count this week:Four. Rose was only in one and Mackenzie and Kirby didn't appear at all.The only ones to manage three were Irene, Leah, Justin and Eden. Well, there was a lot of back and forth from Roo there, with Tane pulling her one way and Alf pulling her the other.I just really wish we'd had a mention of Maddy: Sure, she wasn't a baby, but Roo took her in and loved her like a daughter and let go when it was time for her to move on.Despite Felicity's words, I do wonder if Roo has thought this through because she seems to be making the exact same mistake as Felicity did, assuming she can just step in and do this and then hand the baby over to Tane, when there are a lot more variables in place. Felicity was definitely in force of nature mode here: Maybe people should stop having them conferences in Salt if they don't want her getting wind of things! Barging in and disrupting the increasingly irritating Bree's wallowing was most welcome! Whilst she did seem to have a pretty good handle on things herself, I'm glad that she ignored Mackenzie's tantrum and put Xander back in charge. Theo and Valerie really do seem to have swapped over now: Not so long ago, he was the one dependent on the pills to get through things and she was the one advising him to use them in moderation, now she's the one that seems to be permanently high and he's the one wondering if things are going too far.Valerie continues to feel like her life in Summer Bay could come to an end just like that, and since she's not a regular she could well be right...which is a shame because she's exactly the sort of messed up youngster who seems to be a good person deep down that could use this town's healing touch.

I didn't think Alf was being fair on anyone here.I get that he's worried about Roo running herself ragged being glued to Maia's side at the hospital, but his solution is to have Tane go back to doing it instead, which isn't really a solution at all.And his way of trying to achieve it is to harass Rose over a decision she didn't make and doesn't have the power to change:Why not go and see the mysterious Sarge about it rather than putting it all on the police officer he knows?There was at least an attempt to be sensible by trying to find a foster carer for Maia, but Alf didn't really go far with it and probably isn't happy with Tane's solution... I like that Mali continues to be supportive of Rose, and also that Felicity was a grown-up about it and didn't have a go. Well, that was Levi's plans to resume his time holed up with Mackenzie scuppered, as he instead has to hang out with Eden until finally having to go home for the first time in about three weeks.There's still that lingering feeling that Mackenzie might have been the reason Eden and Levi reconnected but she's also going to be the reason why they fall out again.

John actually did ask Alf to take part! I was expecting a silent glare until John got the hint and left, but in fact, it was Alf that got out of there as fast as possible! Then Xander and Dana get roped in, and I'm guessing Alf explained to them that they weren't actually getting married off screen. John did a decent job, so it's a bit of a shame that Leah and Justin knocked him back, but it is their choice.We get an oblique reference to Theo being away: Are he and Valerie still at wherever they went instead of the clinic? I assumed they were only going to be gone a few hours! Bree pretty much showed that Remi's better off without her: That rant at Justin was very out of line and deserved a proper apology, not a beep-beep. And she doesn't even have the self-awareness to realise that "throwing away a relationship over a motorbike" applies equally to her. Not that Remi came across any better. Levi might be a terrible husband but I loved his blunt bedside manner to Remi.Going to Reefton Lakes is a decent compromise...if rather unnecessary, given that Bree seems to be hiding away as much as him.Levi seemed to mix a big dollop of truth into the story he told Eden, pretty much admitting his marriage is in trouble. Seems like Roo has replaced Tane in every way, gluing herself to Maia's bedside!

I think Justin was talking about the fact Brody isn't around to help in the build-up to the wedding, not whether or not he'll be at the ceremony. Mind you, Theo was nowhere to be seen in the preparations today! It was rather funny that Leah and Justin had diametrically opposing ideas to whether or not Salt was the ideal venue.Meanwhile, John's back in town (his claim to have been gone a week made a bit more sense than Irene saying it had only been a couple of days!) and desperately looking for couples (or indeed anyone) for him to practice his magic celebrant skills on: Who would he have asked to be groom if Irene had said yes, Alf?! I can see why people would find John irritating but I found that scene of him going full steam ahead on detailing his plans to a slack-jawed Leah and Justin utterly hilarious. I think it's the fact that his heart is in the right place and he genuinely thinks he's giving them a wonderful gift that they're going to love which makes me willing to be carried along with his insanity. It was mentioned that Stevie's agent forwarded the package which was given to them by persons unknown, so presumably whoever dropped it off at the door was genuine and...just a bit shy? I don't know what it says about my priorities that I really didn't want Cash to do too much damage to the cute teddy bear... We hear that Stevie isn't actually in the film she was going to the premiere of, which I guess explains her reference to a lead actress who isn't her a while back. A shame they didn't make it and we get a little hint of back story for her too. Remi's back sans bike: I really don't see why Eden couldn't have fitted it in the back of the van, unless she was doing it deliberately? It's hard to tell what his attitude is with Bree. Does he regret his decision and feel it's too late to go back? Does he think that if they did get back together, sooner or later Bree would start dictating terms again? He seemed to be trying to prove something with his impromptu weight listing and failed, but it's got Eden asking questions of Levi again, who really does need to start coming up with more varied excuses!

I feel like Valerie's got a lot of insecurities and, except for the drugs, I think she and Theo actually could be good for each other.That is a pretty big "except" though, and the fact they've been enabling each other isn't good.I'm not sure how I feel about Valerie lying about going to the clinic, it did seem like Leah kept pushing the issue until she heard the answer she wanted.Anyway, for all Valerie's paranoia, Leah and Justin seem happy about them being together, although that will probably change if/when they get the whole story! Brody gets a mention, but Theo is the obvious candidate among the current cast for being Justin's best man and he kind of justified it. Sorry, Roo's now glued to Maia's bedside? I mean, I guess it explains when she's not in an episode, but what happened to only medical and social staff being allowed near her? I could understand Harper and Dana stepping up, since they're the only ones that qualify, but how does Roo fit in? Are we to assume that the hospital staff (and Rose) have just decided to turn a blind eye and ignore Sarge's diktats? (After all, none of them minded Tane being there.) Anyway, Dana tried to be a bit more practical but there were big holes in her plan. Rose turns out to be the latest Death Throes fan: I guess Cash really is the only person in the world who isn't! And his lack of showbiz knowledge means he's behind again, as everyone just assumes he knows another castmember died. A camera hidden in a teddy bear: The stalker isn't Robert Robertson, is it?!

Maybe it's because I've never been a huge Marilyn fan (or a fan of her and Donald together) but I found it completely in character, and I think it definitely adds an extra layer to her obsessiveness with having a baby, both during that second stint and during more recent years, to know that she had a child out there who she'd chosen to cut off and pretend didn't exist and that she was trying to bury those feelings by focusing on some second chance at motherhood.

It feels like there's a lot of "excepts" here. "Since Sally's departure, there's been no returns of characters from the first 20 years except Kane and Kirsty, Pippa, Shelley, Sally, Morag, Celia, Colleen, Marilyn, Roo recast, Olivia recast, Duncan recast, Quinn recast, Martha recast technically and Dmitri." And maybe some others that I've forgotten. I certainly accept that the current show is reluctant to acknowledge its past, and there are certainly characters from that era who'd have a reason to come back, but I think there's a certain snobbishness about acting as though the characters from the first 20 years are all sacred icons and bringing back someone who only debuted 10 years ago doesn't count. It is ironic that Neighbours and Home and Away have pretty much swapped over from where they were 20 years ago: Back then Neighbours was outright saying they didn't think the current audience cared about the show's history while Home and Away was organising regular reunions of old characters. Now Home and Away is the one trying to avoid mentions of the past as much as possible (and oddly skirting around it when they do, like the recent references to Roo giving up a child for adoption), while Neighbours has gone way too far in the other direction, being run by overgrown fanboys who think bringing back a short-lived character from over 30 years ago to deliver about four lines while being virtually unrecognisable is a work of genius. I think there is an argument that Home and Away's format of a revolving door of younger characters (which they've always had) with a few stalwarts that lapsed viewers can latch onto as recognisable (six character who've been there over 10 years, with a seventh who's been there nearly 8 and none of them look like they're going anywhere) seems to have worked at keeping it in the public eye, while Neighbours has narrowly survived cancellation, been reduced to four episodes a week and relegated to streaming in most countries and seems to be being made purely for a committed minority. So, yeah, it's a shame, but we've still got a show that many people still enjoy so I won't complain too loudly.