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Lullabye

Guest bradyell

By Guest bradyell
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bradyell Member

bradyell

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Thanks so much for the comments guys :D

Don't worry, i'm still working on brothers in arms, infact i have word open right now and a fair bit of the next update done, should be with you at some point this week!

Now....back to this one...You may need tissues again, sorry!!

3

Nicole placed her hand on Aden’s back and gently guided him back to the chair. She perched on the arm rest next to him and watched as he cried himself out offering the occasional words of comfort even though she knew they would do little to sooth his heartbreak.

The baby that was cradled in his arms remained still as tears dripped off his chin onto the blanket that was swaddling her. He kept his eyes firmly trained on her a bittersweet feeling engulfing him when he realised how much of Belle was hiding in the tiny face. Their eyes were the exact same shape and whilst Lola’s were a dark blue at the moment like all babies, he was sure that within time they would change to the deep chocolate brown of her mothers. He loosened his hold on her with one arm and used that hand to gently brush over the wispy brown hair that covered her head and then trailed his finger over her forehead and down to the little button nose that again was just like Belle’s.

“She’s beautiful.” Nicole broke the silence when she noticed that Aden’s tears had dried up.

“Yeah she is.” He whispered as he lowered his head to place a gentle kiss on the baby girl’s forehead.

“Lola….it really suits her; it’s pretty just like her.” Nicole told him, taking hold of the tiny hand that had broken free from the blankets.

“Belle….” Aden had to take a deep breath to keep tears at bay once again. “…it was her favourite. We had a list and I wasn’t sure but she loved it so much, every time we sat down to talk about it Lola was the only name she’d come up with for a girl.”

“It’s perfect isn’t it Lola?”

Almost as if she was responding to Nicole’s question the little girl began to squirm in Aden’s embrace, her other arm flailing around under the blanket trying to find an escape.

“It’s alright baby, shhh, you want daddy to help? Here…” Aden carefully manoeuvred Lola so that he could adjust the blanket to allow her to free her arm. “There that’s better isn’t it.” He soothed pressing another kiss to her head.

Over the past few months he had thought a lot about how he would take to fatherhood but now, as he held his baby in his arms he realised that it was instinctual. He knew with every part of his being that he would do whatever it took to keep his little girl happy and safe. He also knew that the months ahead were going to be the most difficult of his life but resolved in that moment to fight his way through for the sake of his daughter.

“Nic, could you….could you give us a minute?”

“You want me to leave?” Nicole checked “Are you sure?” She looked back and forth between him and Lola and then Belle.

“Yeah” Aden nodded as he took a deep breath. “We’ll be out in a little while.”

“Ok.” She leant over and kissed Lola and then ran her hand over Aden’s hair and pressed a kiss to the top of his head. “I’ll be just outside.” She walked away from him pausing at the side of Belle’s bed. “Bye Belle, I love you.” She whispered brushing a kiss onto Belle’s cheek before leaving the room quietly.

*******

“So….i guess it’s just the two of us now Lola.”

Aden adjusted his hold on the baby bringing her to rest on his legs as one of his hands supported her head and neck, the other playing carefully with her tiny fingers.

“It’s not gonna be easy sweetheart.” He admitted with a sigh. “What are we going to do without your mommy?” His glance rose to the bed and landed on Belle. “She’s the best Lola, I love her so much and I know you would too. God, she’d have loved you so, so much, she was looking forward to meeting you more than I’ve ever known her look forward to anything.”

Flashback

Belle lay curled up on the sofa relishing the peace and quiet of the early morning. She had a stack of magazines and brochures next to her and her hands resting on her protruding stomach, a smile coming to her face as she felt a fluttering beneath her fingers.

“Hey my baby…” she whispered “…have you woken up to keep mommy company huh? I hope you are practicing your wave little one cause daddy and I are going to get to see you again later. That’s very exciting isn’t it?” Her grin widened as she felt another movement as if in response. “You are such a good baby.”

“A good baby would still be asleep at seven am sweetheart.” Aden mumbled as he made his way sleepily down the stairs. “What are you doing up so early? You remember we both have the day off right?”

“Really, we have the day off?” Belle asked with more than a hint of sarcasm. “Aden, I’ve been looking forward to today since……since….”

“Since the last scan?” Aden guessed as he flopped down onto the couch next to her. “Me too.” He added with a grin reaching a hand out to rub her stomach tenderly. “Morning baby.” After sharing a gentle kiss with Belle he relaxed and made himself comfortable, pulling Belle into his arms. “So what you up to so early?”

“Just browsing.” Belle replied picking up one of the brochures from the top of the pile. “I was thinking that maybe after the scan we could head into the city and make a start on some baby shopping?”

“Make a start?” Aden chuckled. “What’s all that stuff upstairs then?” He asked referring to the various bags that were in the room they had set aside for the nursery.

“That’s….that’s just little things” Belle conceded with a shy giggle “And Nic bought most of it.”

“True.” He laughed. Nicole was thrilled with the prospect of becoming an auntie and had yet to arrive at their house without some kind of gift for her new niece or nephew.

“So how about it? We could choose the pushchair and the crib and other furniture for the nursery.”

Her joy at the prospect of buying things for their child was so apparent and Aden couldn’t resist stealing a quick kiss from her.

“Ok sweetheart, you’re on.”

_______

The couple spent an hour or so looking through the various magazines and brochures arguing light heartedly over what they were going to buy later in the day. They took their time getting ready before heading to the hospital for Belle’s appointment.

“You alright?” Aden whispered as Belle lay on the hospital bed awaiting the sonographer.

“Mmmm, just nervous, what if…..”

“Hey!” Aden interrupted taking hold of her hand. “What if nothing! It’s gonna be fine alright. Bub has been kicking like a star footie player hasn’t he?”

“Aden!” Belle rolled her eyes with an exasperated sigh. “It could be a girl!”

“Yeah, I guess it could.” Aden nodded his head thoughtfully. “You know, if we just….”

“No way!” Belle exclaimed. “We are not finding out the sex. We’ve been through this.”

“I’m just sayin.” He grinned. “It’d stop all the arguments and would make choosing a name easier.”

“Yeah but…..no! we aren’t finding out the sex!”

“Ah, if I had a dollar for every time I walked in on this argument.” The sonographer laughed as she walked into the room.

They spent a few moments exchanging greetings and Belle answered a few questions about the progress of the pregnancy.

“Let’s have a look at this baby then.” The sonographer helped Belle to arrange her top so it was completely clear of her bump before reaching for a tube of gel. “This’ll be a little bit cold.” She warned as she squeezed the tube.

Belle let out an involuntary gasp as the cold gel hit her stomach. She felt Aden’s grip on her hand tighten as the sonographer began to move the wand around on her stomach. She flicked a quick glance towards him, smiling when she saw how focused he was on the screen that would in a matter of moments be displaying an image of their child.

“Here we are.”

After a few moments of fuzzy grey the image on the screen became clear.

“That’s…..that’s amazing.” Aden whispered. “Look Belle.”

“I’m looking babe.” She giggled “Is….is it sucking it’s thumb?”

“It looks like it.” Aden agreed his voice filled with awe.

“Yep, it sure is.” The sonographer smiled “Now it looks like everything is pretty good, you can see the heart beating here.” She pointed to the screen before pressing a few buttons on the machine and within moments the room was filled with a rhythmic whooshing sound.

“Wow, that’s pretty fast.” Belle whispered

“Girls heartbeats are faster than boys right?” Aden asked remembering something he had read somewhere.

The sonographer laughed. “That whole guessing the sex by the heartbeat thing is really just an old wives tale. I can tell you if you’d like….”

“No!” Belle insisted before Aden could even get a word in. “We don’t want to know do we?” She tore her eyes from the screen and looked pointedly at her husband.

“Nah.” Aden smiled, his eyes still firmly fixated on the screen. “So, everything is ok yeah?”

“Absolutely, all the measurements are good and the heartbeat is strong. Everything is in the right place. Looks like you are going to have a nice healthy baby.”

Both Aden and Belle nodded in response, once again becoming engrossed in the image of their child.

End flashback

Before he had time to think about it Aden was on his feet and making his way towards Belle, Lola resting against his chest. He sat down and carefully lowered the baby onto the bed as close as he could to where Belle’s head rested on the pillow.

“Look what we made Belle.” He whispered. He kept one hand on Lola ensuring she was safe as she lay quite contentedly. His other hand hesitantly rose towards Belle’s face and after a few moments finally made contact as he let out a sob. “Look what we made.” He repeated as tears began to run down his cheeks once again. “Belle….how…how am I gonna live without you….I need you….our baby girl needs you….She’s perfect, she looks just like you.” He lapsed into silence as he cradled Belle’s face in his hands, sobs causing his whole frame to shake. He let himself cry for a few minutes before pulling himself together. “I love you so much Belle, that’s never going to change. You are the best thing that ever happened to me…well one of the two best things.” He corrected as Lola began to squirm on the bed, a small whimper spilling over her lips. “Shhh, I’ve got you angel.” He soothed as he lifted her and brought her to rest against his shoulder. “Belle, babe I promise I’ll do everything I can to keep our baby safe and happy. I’ll make you proud sweetheart.” He leant forward carefully and pressed his lips against Belle’s “Sweet dreams Belle, I love you.” And with that he stood up and took a last long look at his wife. “I love you.” He whispered again before turning around and leaving the room.

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bradyell Member

bradyell

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Thanks for the lovely reviews so far folks, really glad you are all enjoying it! If all goes to plan it won't be :( for too much longer, I've promised some people some fluff and i hope to deliver soon :D:D

4

Aden had been through some hard times in his life. He’d suffered years of abuse at the hands of his grandfather and the far reaching consequences of that had even had him admitted into a psychiatric clinic for a short time but nothing in his life had ever been as hard as walking out of the hospital room away from his wife. It took every ounce of strength he possessed to reach out his hand and push open the door. Just knowing that he would never see her smile at him again, never feel her lips moving beneath his, never see her cradle their child in her arms, caused him more pain than he thought he could bare . If it weren’t for their daughter he would have crawled into the bed with Belle and hoped that whatever forces had stolen her away would take him too. But he was a father now and whatever he did from this moment on would be for Lola. He was determined to fulfil the promise he had just made his wife. He would be the best daddy any little girl could wish for.

Taking a deep breath he applied enough pressure to the door to open it fully and walked out of the room and into the hospital corridor. As she had promised Nicole was waiting just outside the room along with Irene and Roman.

“Hey.” He murmured

“Son….come here mate.” Roman closed the gap between them in a few long strides and wrapped his arms around Aden’s shoulders pulling him into an embrace. “I am….god Aden I’m so sorry, I can’t tell you.”

“Yeah, I know.” Aden replied in a whisper. “Hey watch my girl there.”

“Oh yeah, sorry.” Roman pulled back and looked down at the baby nestled against Aden’s chest. “Nic said she has a name…?”

“Lola.” Aden replied just as the girl in question let out a whimper of distress.

Irene immediately jumped up from her chair and rushed over to Aden her hands outstretched in order to lift the baby from him.

“It’s alright Irene, I’ve got her.” Aden said.

“Of course you have darl.” Irene replied coming to a halt and dropping her hands to her sides. “I….She’s probably hungry. It’s been a while since she fed.”

“Is that it sweetheart, are you hungry?” Aden lifted the little girl away from his chest and raised her so her face was level with his. “Don’t cry baby, daddy’s here.” He soothed, bringing her closer to him so he could kiss her cheeks when the cries escalated.

He was so engrossed in soothing his daughter that he missed the look that passed between Nicole and the others that clearly said ‘I told you so.’

“I’ll go and see if I can find a bottle.” Irene told him, reaching out to gently rub Lola’s back before making her way along the corridor towards the nurse’s station.

“There you go Lola, hear that?” Aden whispered as he gently bounced the baby up and down in his arms. “Your milk will be here in just a minute. Let’s not get all worked up eh.”

“Looks like you two are already on the same wavelength.” Roman pointed out when Lola’s cries subsided after a few minutes.

“I hope so.” Aden murmured.

“Look mate, you know we’re all gonna be here for you don’t you? You aren’t in this alone.” Roman reassured, squeezing Aden’s arm for added emphasis.

“Yeah, thanks. I’ll pro…..”

Aden was interrupted when Irene came back into view, a bottle clutched in her hand and a less than impressed look on her face. The reason for her frown soon became apparent when Rachel rounded the corner behind her closely followed by Amanda.

“Aden, you’re out.” Amanda stated the obvious, her loud exclamation causing Lola to begin to cry again. “And what’s wrong with my granddaughter, why is she crying?” She strode towards Aden and like Irene had previously stretched out her hands in the direction of the distressed baby.

Aden instantly took a step backwards. “It’s alright Amanda, I’ve got her. She’s just hungry.” He reached out a hand to take the bottle Irene was holding out for him but Amanda beat him to it, practically snatching it from the other woman.

“Are you hungry little one? Come to nana and I’ll feed you.” She raised her hands once more, this time resting one of them against the baby girl’s back.

“I said I’ve got her.” Aden repeated. “And I’ll feed her.” He plucked the bottle out of Amanda’s hand and walked away from her, taking a deep breath to control his temper.

“Aden...” Rachel followed him across to the seating area and sat down next to him. “How’re you holding up?”

He shrugged his shoulders in response as he tried to work out how best to hold the baby to feed her. This was completely new to him and he had no idea what he was doing.

“Here…” Rachel offered him a friendly smile despite the fact that her heart was breaking for him. “…like this.” She helped him to rearrange Lola and showed him the best angle to hold the bottle. “Just make sure the teat is always filled with milk so she isn’t guzzling air.” She advised.

“Thanks Rach.” He murmured.

“Honey, I know now isn’t the best time but when you are ready let me know and we can talk about what happened ok. I know you’ll want answers an….”

“Too right we want answers. My daughter is dead in there! Somebody needs to be held accountable!”

“Amanda!” Irene exclaimed. “I know you are upset, we all are, but now is not the time.”

“Irene’s right.” Roman added when he noticed Amanda bracing herself to retaliate. He moved so he was standing next to her and slipped an arm around her shoulder. “None of us are thinking straight at the moment are we?”

“No…no I’m not…I just….”

“Shhh, it’s alright.” Roman soothed as Amanda lowered her head onto his shoulder and wept.

*******

Roman, Amanda and Irene went to spend a little time with Belle whilst Aden fed his daughter. Nicole decided to remain with him to keep him company.

She sat down on the opposite side to him as Rachel and watched him intently.

“You’re a natural.” She commented as she took the now empty bottle from him to free his hands.

“Thanks. So err….now what? Do I wind her or…?”

“Yes, that’s right.” Rachel answered “Would you like me to do it to show you how it’s done?”

Aden hesitated for a moment, looking down at his daughter.

“Yeah…I ...I guess. I don’t really know...”

“Hey, that’s ok.” Rachel replied instantly “Come on Lola.” She lifted the baby from him and placed her against her shoulder and began to gently rub on her back. “Everybody has to learn this stuff Aden alright?”

He nodded in reply as Nicole slipped her hand into his to offer him her support.

“You are doing great.” She told him “And like dad said, we are all here for you. I mean I don’t know much about babies but I can like…help you dress her.”

Rachel stifled a laugh and much to his surprise Aden smiled at Nicole.

“Thanks Nic. Rach, everything’s alright isn’t it? With Lola I mean.”

“Absolutely.” Rachel replied. “We had a paediatrician check her over and everything is perfect.”

“So I can take her home?” Aden asked reaching over to pick Lola up, bringing her to rest against his shoulder, his nose instantly nuzzling into the delicate spot beneath her ear.

“I don’t see why not.” Rachel told him with a smile.

“Well I certainly do!” Amanda had just exited Belle’s room and overheard the last part of their conversation. “No offence Aden but you know nothing about bringing up a child. I think it would be for the best if the baby came home with me.”

“Excuse me!” Nicole exploded before anybody else had the chance to respond. “How dare you!”

“Alright, let’s just take it easy.” Roman stepped in front of Amanda when Nicole stood up and moved towards her. “Nic, leave it.”

“Yes Nicole, this has nothing to do with you.” Amanda scolded “I don’t want to upset anybody, least of all Aden but I really do think the little one will be better off with somebody who knows what they are doing.”

“And you think that’s you do ya?” Irene piped up, walking out of the room. “Now look here missy…”

“No you look here Irene.” Amanda interrupted “I realise you did a lot for Belle but I’m a blood relative of the baby and that means….”

“Lola.”

Aden had remained silent throughout the argument but spoke as he stood up from his seat

“Her name is Lola and she’s coming home with me.”

“Aden..” Amanda began “I think…”

“You know what? I don’t care what you think.” Aden’s voice was low but there was no mistaking the anger lining his words. “My wife is dead, now I have to figure out how to raise our baby by myself. Yes it’s going to be difficult and you’re right, I have no idea what I’m doing, Lola and I will have to work it out together. But I do know one thing for sure Amanda, nobody will be taking my baby anywhere…ever!”

And without another word Aden turned on his heel, Lola held tightly against his chest, and walked away from the assembled group towards the hospital exit.

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