Stuart2006 Posted November 18, 2006 Report Posted November 18, 2006 Story Title: Give it a name, any name we can edit it later Story description: main characters Type of story: long fic/ short fic Main Characters: BTTB rating: see official ratings guidance (make this a link) does story include spoilers: yes/no Is story being proof read: yes/ no by who? Any warnings: Sexual content, violence, language summary: 5 lines max Christmas Day Beth wakes up to find a mystery present lying under their nicely decorated tree. It was a square shape and was wrapped with a note on it saying Merry Christmas....... Beth slowly un-wrapped it unknown what was in it. She pulled the wrapping paper off to find a brown cardboard box. She cut the tape of the top and opened it slowly. Whatever it was was in a box full of cotton wool. She digged through it and tried to see a present. Tony was suddenly awoken by a loud scary scream made by Beth. He rushed through to find beth holding a teddy with a picture of her face on it and a knife through it. Fake blood was on the knife. A note was attached to it saying Next Time It Will Be You.......... Meanwhile, Belle rushed to the living room of Irene and Amandas joint house to find all the presents gone and seen a banner on the wall saying ENJOY YOUR CHRISTMAS YOU BI*** She cried out to Amanda and Irene who put this here? They never came so she went through to the bedroom to find Amanda gone and irene sleeping. Amanda was on the conservitory with a gun in her hands! Will she kill somebody? Was it her who sent the presents?
angelgirl Posted November 18, 2006 Report Posted November 18, 2006 That is really good!I like it!Cant wait till the next update!Well done Stuart
Stuart2006 Posted November 18, 2006 Report Posted November 18, 2006 Thanks for the comments AngelGirl and JackandMartha4eva(Emma((I think)
Stuart2006 Posted November 19, 2006 Report Posted November 19, 2006 Thanks next update coming very soon1 If you want a teaser for it post here!
Stuart2006 Posted November 21, 2006 Report Posted November 21, 2006 (Scene opens with a loud gun shot, a scream then dead silence then Home And Away appears) Amandalooks down from the balcony to see Josh Wests (He was dead) body lying with fresh blood dripping from him. Amanda looks around and sees next door and shouts Oh My God who is that! She smirks then climbs carefully down the side of the building to examine the body! Suddenly she sees 3 gun shots flying towards her and she jumps away not getting hit. Just thetn she is injected from behind and then she collapses onto the pavement. Belle woke Irene up and said Wheres Mum? Away to the shop she said followed by a yawn. Irene get up and look at this. Irene got up and walked through to the living room. Everything was back to normal. Irene walked to the kitchen and put the kettle on. Belle jumped in happiness and then like a kid pulled the presents from the 19FT Tree and ripped them open. Irene seen a brown box sitting on the balcony so she slid the door open and picked it up. She opened it and found a memory stick and a note. 19 Flat Steet Summer Bay 9JS 5GH Aus. Dear Irene and Amanda and Belle, Plug this memory stick provided in the computer and you will see a movie which will be the best present you have ever seen. I hope you enjoy your present! From A Friend P.S MERRY CHRISTMAS!!! Irene said Wait until Amanda returns and we can use the big projector! Meanwhile, It started to snow and amandas body was covered in snow. Nobody could see her! At Surf Club A figure walked around placing a large screen on the wall with a projector facing it. They posted things saying town meeting at 9.30AM. Everybody gathered around while talking about who organised it. They gathered in the room then the lights went off and the figure turned the movie on and then ran out and locked the door. The lights stayed off but the movie started. (On The Screen - Flashbacks of Josh Wests office murder,Jack and Marthas wedding,The school Fire,Matilda turning bad,Lucas turning bad,Lee Pregnent,Steve Braehead and then pictures of the bay members and then a picture of a blacked out face. Then in a blood writing Merry Christmas!) Then lights turned on and door unlocked. Alf stood up and said We Need to discuss the weird presents we all got. From A Friend! Beth shouted out I got a movie but i've not watched it yet. Alf said Bring It here and we all will watch it. Here beth threw the memory stick to tony and he put it in the computer. The movie said Loading then it showed amanda with the gun then a gunshot and then amanda lying on the pavement and then her in the snow. Kim shouted Help! Kit said Hey Calm Down. HOW CAN I CALM DOWN WHEN THEIRS A LOONY WITH US! Will amanda survive? Who is the lonnitic?
Eli Posted November 21, 2006 Report Posted November 21, 2006 I really like it, and can't wait for the next update. Just an advice: To make it easier to read you should maybe have a proofreader read through it before you post? EDIT: I think I need a proofreader on all my posts, I spell words wrong all the time
~Rosey~ Posted November 21, 2006 Report Posted November 21, 2006 ^ Thats what I was going to say. I would happily proofread
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