Peter's Ice Creams

[Skykat]

Okay this is a one shot and hopefully will make enough sense on its own but it's also the third one shot I've written about these two characters in this scenario so if you want to understand the whole context it might be easier to read 'The Meeting' and 'The healing power of coffee' first. The links can be found in my sig.

Thanks to Musie for the inspiration for this fic and to Quiet Achiever who proof read for me and suggested the title.

Story Title: Peter's Ice Creams

Type of story: One Shot

Main Characters: Peter/Kit

BTTB rating: G / T

Genre: Angst

Does story include spoilers: no

Any warnings: AU pairings

Summary: Peter and Kit are both in therapy for different reasons but after meeting randomly have come to realise that actually they have more in common than they thought.

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Kit felt her fingers automatically curl around the arm of the couch; she gripped the soft leather and shifting her weight, tucked her legs up underneath her. Her fingers automatically entered her mouth as her teeth searched for any tiny section of nail that was biteable. Unable to find one she turned her attention instead to the black, newly applied nail polish. Not that she had much nails to cover, mind you, but it had seemed right somehow to paint her nails this morning. The colour had seemed especially fitting, nothing quite summed up her attitude towards these cumcumbersome sessions than the dull black.

“You say you loved Noah. How did it feel when he chose to go back to Hayley?”

Kit shot her sharpest glare at the woman who sat at the desk across from her. She was sat there so prim and proper, her glasses had fallen ever so slightly down her nose, her immaculate crisp white shirt was moulded to her slim figure and she tapped long, immaculate nails against the hard wood desk.

“Kit?” she pressed, picking up her pen and looking expectantly over her glasses.

“It felt like Christmas had come early.” Kit looked up and smiled sweetly. She knew her voice was dripping with sarcasm but she could hardly help herself, what a stupid question to ask? Kit shifted her weight again and with her knees now pressed against her chest she wrapped her arms around her legs.

From behind her desk she scribbled something on her notepad; sighing softly she sat back in her chair and waited in anticipation for Kit to speak but Kit could think of absolutely nothing to say. Instead she returned to examining her nails, picking out spots where the varnish was clumped and it was likely to scrape off more easily.

“What did Hayley look like?” The question was fired and Kit raised an eyebrow at her the questioner.

“Well daaarling she had a simply divine figure, like to die for, you know; long blonde hair, the colour of gold and simply the most perfect little features, long legs, big smile, hot ass, the ultimate golden girl.” Kit giggled to herself as she perfectly executed the overly posh, affected accent she had seen so many times on television.

“So how did you feel next to her?” It was Kit’s turn now to cross her arms over her chest as she returned her feet to the floor and glared across the room. Jeez did the woman ever liven up? (Enough with the twenty questions already!) She looked like she had a permanent rod up her ass, or her head, or even both. Ooh now that was a vision…Kit clamped a hand over her mouth to stifle her giggles.

“Kit there is no point you having these sessions if you’re not going to take them seriously.” All acts of pretence had gone now as she rose to her full six foot eleven stature or whatever height models were nowadays. “Your mother is paying a lot of money for these sessions.”

“Yeah well at least she’s spending money on me for a change and not on bloody perfect Scott and Hayley.” Kit was not sure where her outburst came from or where the venom had been hiding but the words had just erupted from inside her and she felt almost shocked at herself.

“After the only two guys you loved chose Hayley over you she then gets with your brother, has his son and therefore gets all his attention and your mothers. I guess you really hate her.” She had sat back down again now, the whispers of a smile grazing her lips and Kit felt almost as if she had lost a battle; she just wasn’t exactly sure what battle she’d lost.

“Hayley’s nice.” It was the truth and somehow it didn’t seem right to have a perfect stranger running Hayley down. “She’s one of those people you just can’t help but like, everyone loves Hayley.” Despite her best attempts she could not keep the envy from her voice and the counsellor’s knowing look told Kit she had picked up on it

“And what did she have that you didn’t?” She fired the question before Kit was ready and Kit’s mouth betrayed her brain by answering.

“Where do you want to start? Gorgeous, slim, kind, gentle, artistic, clever, funny, you could write a book on her attributes.” There was no accent this time, no nothing. Just a picture of Hayley very clear in her mind, memories of when Noah had died, how they had sat together, how they had bonded and how they had both refused to believe he was gone.

Kit shut her eyes as she felt the tears press. She still thought of Noah, even now. Gorgeous, gentle Noah, the first guy to ever give her a chance; the first person to look beyond the fat, the frumpiness and the alcohol. He was the first person who had seen the real Kit, the one that hid behind the bolshieness and attitude, the scared, screaming little child that had just wanted to be loved. And in his own way he had loved her, he had cared for her but Hayley had been his soul mate. Beautiful, perfect Hayley.

“How did you feel towards Hayley? Resentment? Jealousy? Guilt?” Kit opened her eyes and looked up.

Kit shrugged. “Hayley was nice,” she repeated. On the wall behind her Kit heard the clock chime signalling the end of the session and she stood up, eager to escape.

“Same time next week?” She asked as Kit’s hand desperately sought out the door handle, opening it in a flash of a second, seeking her escape.

“Sure, whatever.” Answer given, Kit bolted from the surgery, away from the questions and the prying eyes. Once outside the crisp air hit her like a blast, the sun felt soft and warm on her skin.

It was a beautiful day with a clear, cloudless, blue sky. Perfect beach weather, except that Kit had never been one for the beach. She had never quite fitted into the whole beach babe category, not like Hayley had. Goddamn, perfect Hayley. Angrily Kit punched the wall beside her, wincing as her knuckles connected with the hard brick, ignoring the tears that attacked her eyes.

“What’d the wall do?” Kit looked up, momentarily startled, although she didn’t really know why. She had known he would be here. They hadn’t arranged this meeting as such but since the first counselling session when they had met accidentally it had become a habit to meet afterwards, to have somebody else who knew just how hard this “baring your soul stuff” really was. She looked up, nursing her bruised knuckles to meet Peter Baker’s amused but sympathetic eyes.

“What didn’t it do? It got in my way, it just was there when I needed something to punch, damn stupid wall was asking for it.” She was rewarded with a laugh, his blue eyes sparkling with amusement.

“When you put it like that I guess it does.” He ran a hand through his tousled blonde hair and Kit noticed that his shoulders were set in a firm line, his jaw locked in automatic position, the tension evident on his face and she knew he felt as uneasy as she did.

“So are you treating me to coffee this week?” She demanded her hands on her hips and eyebrow raised.

His grin returned but this time it didn’t quite reach his eyes and Kit saw it for what it really was, a mask and she knew if she had a mirror she’s see an identical grin on her face. “I treated you last week.” He mimicked her movements and Kit had enough experience of guys to know she was being made fun of. There was no malice in him though, just an obvious need to lighten the mood.

“Nope bad memory I definitely paid.” She twisted her arms around behind her head and performed an elaborate skip over the pavement cracks before grinning up at him, daring him to copy her now.

“Okay compromise, how about because it’s such a nice day we go sit in the park and I’ll let you buy me an ice cream.” He was shaking his head in amusement, quietly awaiting her reaction. Kit ignored him and instead began scanning the sky above her, gesturing wildly “Look!”

“What?” He followed her gaze and then looked at her in confusion his expression suggesting he clearly thought her delusional.

“The pig flying, didn’t you see it?” She delivered the line in such a dead pan way that he burst into a peel of laughter that pierced the air and caused passer bys to stop and stare.

“Guess I’m buying the ice creams then, huh?”

“You got it.” She flicked her head to one side and stepped down onto the pavement, falling into step beside him.

They walked in silence until they reached the park, where he held the gate open for her and Kit smiled as her eyes explored her surroundings. The park in Yabbie Creek was nothing special, just your average park, lots of grass and bushes and trees. A playground, mercifully free of children, but then it was a school day. Actually there were very few people around at all, even the skating ramp, usually a haven for bunkers and drug addicts, was deserted.

“So what was your topic for examination today?” he asked the question so casually that to anyone else it might have seemed like he was asking something normal. Kit though, knew better, he wanted to unload and in a way, she did too.

“Oh just my inability to keep a bloke and my supposed jealousy towards Hayley Lawson,” Kit replied candidly, “You?”

“My inability to go after an unattached woman and my supposed obsession with my brother’s wives.” Peter replied, his voice loaded with bitterness. “Think our counsellors are comparing notes the way our sessions always mirror each others?”

“Maybe so. Did you get anywhere?” Peter shrugged.

“Who knows? The counsellor seemed to think it all stemmed back to childhood, the way everything I never did wasn’t good enough yet Dan was “Mr Perfect”. She thinks it’s a psychological thing, I want what Dan has because I see that as some form of perfection.” Peter explained.

“And what do you think?” Kit asked, not entirely surprised at how easily he was opening up to her. The initial awkwardness of their meetings had eased now and she felt a genuine interest in his issues. It helped to know she wasn’t the only one.

“I think maybe she has a point, it’s certainly not healthy, envying your own brother.”

They had reached the park ice cream van now and conversation was paused momentarily as they both ordered and Peter paid. Falling back into step they passed a few minutes in silence, eating their ice creams but it wasn’t a forced silence. Somehow it felt like nothing really needed to be said.

“So what’s the deal with Hayley then?” Peter asked suddenly, breaking the easy silence that seemed to echo, not just around them but over the whole park. As if other people were giving them a wide berth, leaving them to it, as if they were the only two people in the world.

“I guess it started because I loved Noah and he loved Hayley. She was everything I wasn’t you know; pretty, smart, gorgeous figure, beautiful personality, who would pick me over her? Noah was the first guy I ever really cared for and maybe he had feelings for me but Hayley was always his soul mate. Kim was my next boyfriend but I left for Paris and when I came back he was with Hayley. Man it felt like history was repeating itself.” Kit confided, the words rolling out of her mouth in a way they had never done with her counsellor but she genuinely wanted to tell Peter. Somehow she knew instinctively that he’d understand.

“Isn’t she with Scott now?” Peter broke into her thoughts and her memories, his voice like a breath of cold air waking her mind back up.

“Yeah but that’s just as bad.” Kit admitted as her hands clenched back into their fists, her arms clamped firmly across her chest. She knew Peter was looking at her questioningly but he waited patiently for her to finish.

“See now she’s with Scott it’s like she’s invading my world, she’s got my brother which is someone else who I love. She’s the mother of Mum’s first grandchild and so she still has something over me. It’s like she wasn’t content enough with having my boyfriends, now she wants my family too and she gets all of Mum’s attention. God I sound like such a *****, Hayley has probably never had thoughts like that in her life, she’s just too damned nice but that’s how I feel, you know?”

And Peter did know. He put a hand reassuringly round her shoulder but she did not even notice. She was immersed in the own little world, her body was shaking with her own anger and bitterness. He could almost see it dripping from every pore of her skin.

Gently he guided her to a park bench and they both sank down onto the cold hard wood, their bodies close but not touching, his arm still draped around her shoulder. Kit shut her eyes, taking in gulps of fresh air in an attempt to calm her emotions and soothe her anger. Next to her she could feel the heat of Peter’s body, could feel that he too was shaking and lost in his own memories, trapped in his own world of pain.

“Do you think it’s getting any easier?” he asked suddenly, his voice penetrating the battle in her mind. She shrugged.

“Telling a stranger your deepest darkest fears doesn’t get any better and it still makes me desperate for a drink. It helps me by you being here though and it helps to know that somebody else feels as crap about all this as I do.” She blushed slightly at the revelation and the realisation that her head was now resting on his shoulder, that his arm was pulling her closer to him.

Embarrassed she pulled away.

“Look thanks for the chat but I have to go.” She stood up, her eyes refusing steadfastly to meet his. He must think she was a complete emotional train wreck, spilling her guts out to him. He was probably only still here out of pity, probably felt sorry for her and she couldn’t exactly blame him, she was pitiful and pathetic.

“Kit hang on a minute.” he began but Kit didn’t stop to listen. She had opened up to him and now she just couldn’t bear to even look at him. She just wanted to get out of there as quickly as possible. Speeding up her pace she raced from the park intending to leave Peter Baker and his ability to make her feel completely exposed, far behind.

Peter wasn't prepared to let her go that easily though. Catching her, he took a firm hold on her arm and pulled her round, enveloping her body in a firm hug. "It's okay to talk to me you know," he whispered.

Kit felt the breath she had been holding leave her in a series of huffs that jerked her whole body. "I'm sorry," she whispered.

"I know." He kissed her forehead lightly and released her. "Same time next week?"

"You bet," she grinned this time as she turned and walked away from him.

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