Jump to content

Thirteen (by Ludub) - comments


Red Ranger 1

Recommended Posts

On 5/10/2016 at 1:37 AM, KittCatt said:

Great Chapter!

Glad Kyle was honest with Phoebe. But talking hasn't really helped- he is still having quite a rough time at the moment. Telling Tamara what happened then confronting it might be the only way to help. This is all happening at an unfortunate time where he should be enjoying fatherhood :(

Liked the addition of Alf in this chapter. And now Ash is worried Phoebe is sick. I think there are problems ahead for Ash and Phoebe. I like that hearing what happened to Kyle affected her so much- it shows how much she cares for him.

I hope Kyle starts to feel better soon, but angst and drama is often much more exciting than just being happy :P for us readers anyway, not the characters themselves...Brilliant writing once again. You have such a knack for making us feel for the characters as they go through trauma.  

I look forward to more, update soon :P

Thanks KittCatt! I really appreciate the feedback! :wub: It's really kind of you to say that. I do think that Phoebe would be really upset to think that something bad had happened to Kyle, even if they aren't together anymore. And it kind of makes sense that he would tell her, given that she's the person he's known the longest, and he doesn't have any brothers to look out for him anymore. Glad you're enjoying the story x

  • Like 1
Link to comment
Share on other sites

Great chapter!

I'm not sure Phoebe should have told Ash. That said though, his reaction was very in character- feeling sorry and angry for Kyle. If Kyle does find out Phoebe told Ash he would not trust her again, but i understand her having to express what she was feeling in regards to what has happened to Kyle. Sometimes when you see your loved ones hurt you need support too.

Brilliant scene where Kyle told Tamara what had happened to him. Great writing :) Feel sad for poor Kyle. And it's understandable he would feel guilty for not coming forward to save other children from what he had been through. Such as terrible situation :(

Now regarding the ending- Ash has certainly made a mess of things...As a police officer Kat would now want to know why Ash said that word and what it has to do with Kyle... 

I look forward to more, update soon :P

  • Like 1
Link to comment
Share on other sites

 

3 minutes ago, KittCatt said:

Great chapter!

I'm not sure Phoebe should have told Ash. That said though, his reaction was very in character- feeling sorry and angry for Kyle. If Kyle does find out Phoebe told Ash he would not trust her again, but i understand her having to express what she was feeling in regards to what has happened to Kyle. Sometimes when you see your loved ones hurt you need support too.

Brilliant scene where Kyle told Tamara what had happened to him. Great writing :) Feel sad for poor Kyle. And it's understandable he would feel guilty for not coming forward to save other children from what he had been through. Such as terrible situation :(

Now regarding the ending- Ash has certainly made a mess of things...As a police officer Kat would now want to know why Ash said that word and what it has to do with Kyle... 

I look forward to more, update soon :P

Thanks KittCatt! Much appreciated. :P I thought it would be hard for Phoebe to keep it to herself, especially with Ash getting the wrong end of the stick and badgering her about what happened the other night. She'd have to give him some explanation, and like you said, people often need support themselves. Glad you're enjoying it! xxx

  • Like 1
Link to comment
Share on other sites

Great chapter 

Phoebe really shouldn't of told  Ash Kyle's Secret.

I hope Kyle does go to the Melbourne police.

I look forward to more 

Update again soon :)

 

Edited by Kristen
Link to comment
Share on other sites

8 minutes ago, Kristen said:

Great chapter 

Phoebe really shouldn't of Ash Kyle's Secret.

I hope Kyle does go to the Melbourne police.

I look forward to more 

Update again soon :)

 

Thanks Kristen, I've exceeded my 'likes' for today apparently. I didnt know there was a limit! Lol! Appreciate the feedback :P

Link to comment
Share on other sites

5 hours ago, ~JarlieFanEver~ said:

Great chapter

Phoebe shouldn't have never told Ash about what Kyle told her

Loved the scene when Kyle opened up to Tamara

Oh dear at the ending-Ash making a mess of things

Looking forwards to the next chapter xx

Thanks JarlieFanEver! Appreciate the feedback. :P x 

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Join the conversation

You can post now and register later. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account.

Guest
Reply to this topic...

×   Pasted as rich text.   Paste as plain text instead

  Only 75 emoji are allowed.

×   Your link has been automatically embedded.   Display as a link instead

×   Your previous content has been restored.   Clear editor

×   You cannot paste images directly. Upload or insert images from URL.

  • Recently Browsing   0 members

    • No registered users viewing this page.
×
×
  • Create New...

Important Information

We have placed cookies on your device to help make this website better. You can adjust your cookie settings, otherwise we'll assume you're okay to continue.