Missing Heart

[TelephotoMarigold]

Chapter 130

“The alarm?” Roman groaned.

“Yup, get up, get dressed!” Ella called back cheerfully.

“Why are we getting up?”

“Because,” She shot back and threw back the covers before getting out of the bed.

“It’s still Saturday isn’t it?” He mumbled reaching for the covers.

“I said get up now,” She ordered before heading into the en suite.

Roman heard the shower come on and swore before getting out of bed. He flexed his back, noting the difference between sleeping on the floor and in a bed not to mention the extra activities he and Ella had done the previous night. He headed into the en suite himself grinning as he tugged off his boxers and climbed into the shower with her.

“That wasn’t exactly what I meant,” she mumbled as he sought out her mouth and kissed her.

He smirked as she wrapped her arms around him and he was able to lift her up and press her against him before letting out a husky chuckle as she parted her legs and he was able to sink between them.

“Want me?” He asked.

“I want a cup of coffee more.”

His head shot back and he looked into her eyes before pressing his lips to hers.

“Witch,” he groaned just as he joined his body with hers. With quick thrusts he drove them over the edge before lazily washing each other under the hot spray. Turning the water off he guided them out of the shower and passed her a large towel to dry off with and one for himself. “Please tell me why we are awake at this time on a Saturday? I don’t have work…”

“For once!”

“Yeah, well…” Roman felt himself flushing, he’d been hiding away at work in order not to deal with what was going on with them. Hopefully they were starting to move forward now.

“Anyway, Lily has said she is going to school,” Ella murmured as she moved into the bedroom.

“What?” Roman quickly followed his wife. “Hang on, did you just say…”

She nodded at him before grabbing some clothes and as she got dressed outlined the plan for the day. He couldn’t help but admire her sneakiness once more as he too pulled on clothes, admire it and be a little afraid of it at the same time.

They moved out of the bedroom and down the stairs, stopping in the kitchen, first getting coffee and then organising the breakfasts. The kids began to trail into the room and make their way over to the table as Ella moved out and back up the stairs. She returned twenty minutes later with Lily dressed in her school uniform, leading their daughter to the table and sitting her at it.

“Mama,” Lily began.

“Oh the others are a bit poorly and are staying home today, but we talked remember and even if they are off you still need to go to school,” Ella murmured more for the other kids benefit.

Lily looked down, her expression changing to one of sadness and nodded slowly.

“Good,” Ella murmured.

“Sounds as though Lily will need a big breakfast though,” Roman commented moving back into the kitchen. He came back a few minutes later and placed a plate in front of her containing pancakes, ice cream and a chopped up banana and drizzled in syrup. He grinned when Sammy glared at him. “Sorry Samson, you are sick remember.”

“Yeah,” Sammy muttered still glaring at him.

“Is this for me?” Lily asked her voice awed.

“Got to keep your strength up for school,” Ella told her daughter before glancing at her other children and daring them to say something, like what day of the week it was.

Lily grinned at her and began to demolish the stack of pancakes letting out a loud burp when she’d finished them.

“Oh Lily,” Meggy groaned grinning at her sister.

“Whoops,” Lily murmured, “Sorry!”

Ella giggled before leaning down and kissing the top of Lily’s head.

“Off you go and brush your teeth before you are later for school,” she cautioned.

Lily nodded and jumped down from the table and running out of the room.

“Ok, what is going on?” Georgie muttered the first question.

“When your father takes Lily can you go get your swimming stuff please, we are spending the day at the beach.”

“Huh?” This from Sammy.

“Don’t ask Samson, it’s the parents being weird. It was about time that Lily learnt their weirdness,” Sophie said before flouncing out of the room.

Meggy chuckled before she too stood and after draining her juice she moved over to the twins.

“Come on babes, let’s get you ready,” she told them as she led them out of the room and up the stairs.

“Come on bruv, you ain’t going to get pancakes.”

Sammy frowned at Georgie’s comment before he stood and followed his brother out of the room. That left Liam sitting there looking at them.

“I no no understand, me’s no poorly now,” he murmured shaking his head, “me’s go to school with Lily?”

“No sweetheart, you need to stay home an extra day just to be sure,” Ella murmured catching Roman giving her a look. She smiled innocently back at him before seeing Lily returning to the room. “All set squeals?” She asked and saw her daughter nodding.

“Come on then,” Roman murmured, “See you soon, “ he added giving Ella a meaningful look as he grabbed hold of Lily’s bag and took their daughter out to the car.

Ella heard them set off before she took Liam’s hand and led him out of the room and up the stairs. Within minutes she had got him changed into his swim stuff and left him with the twins for a moment whilst she gathered up things to take with them. Collecting Liam and the twins she made her way down the stairs and put them in the car. Making another trip to the utility room collected the pile of towels needed and she put them in the car, checking on the twins and Liam in the process.

“Nearly ready,” she promised them.

“Beachs Mama?”

“Yes Gust,” Ella smiled at the soft gentle voice of her daughter before scooting back into the house and calling the others to hurry up.

It took a few minutes before they began to trundle out of the house and into the car. Ella gave them a last check before setting off and heading for the beach near the diner. She parked up and led them down to the sand setting up an umbrella for when it got too sunny and putting out towels for everyone to lay on.

As they were settling down and talking about what to do first Lily came running towards them a scowl on her face.

“Mama is not funny!” she declared putting her hands on her hips.

Ella smiled before holding out her arms to her daughter and laughing as Lily launched herself into them.

“Now then, my Lily girl, you can go to school without the others going can’t you?”

“But I misses them Mama,” Lily pouted.

“I know Squeals, but school is important. Anyway, you have Mira and Millie to play with.”

Lily gave a big sigh and nodded.

“Ok’s Mama,” Lily agreed slowly before she pulled back away from her mother and once more glared at her. “Mama me no swims?” she muttered. “No swimming suit.”

Ella pointed to Roman who was standing a little way off where he was holding Lily’s bag.

“Have you looked in that?” she asked her daughter.

Lily gave her another look before laughing and running over to fetch her bag. She opened it up and looked inside before sighing loudly.

“What’s up squeals?” Meggy asked her sister.

“Mama put candy in here,” Lily muttered, “With my swimming suit.”

“Ouh yeah,”

“but I had ice cream,” Lily pouted “and I has a full tummy.”

Sammy gave his sister a look before letting out a loud laugh.

[TelephotoMarigold]

Chapter 131

“Are you having a good day?”

“It’s been great, what did you say to dad he’s like chilled..” Sophie murmured looking over at Roman as he sat with the younger children. He was busy helping them build what was shaping up to look like the biggest castle in history.

“Was there a problem with him then?”

Ella rolled over and sat up before looking at her elder daughter. She caught the expression on Sophie’s face and sighed. Her daughter looked as though she was struggling to find the right words or maybe she was projecting her thoughts on to her.

“You know there was Mum, he’s like, well, like half of him didn’t come back.”

“Back?”

“From being in witness protection.”

“That is a good way of describing it, Soph, and thank you for not making it a big deal,” Ella spoke softly her eyes straying to where Roman was.

“We’re here for him Mum,” Sophie gave her mum a kiss before shooting off back down the beach. Ella watched her daughter go and looked over at Roman. She could see his worried frown from here and sighed once more when he stood up from where he was helping the little ones and moved over to her.

“What did Sophie say?” He asked immediately.

“Just girl stuff.”

Roman nodded before brushing the sand off and sitting on a towel next to her. He glanced over at his kids.

“I’ve been seeing someone.”

“You what?” Ella bit out.

“I’ve been seeing someone. Her name is….”

“Another woman!” Ella faced him her lips pressing together as though to stop herself from screaming at him.

“Her name is Louisa, and she’s a counsellor.”

He finally finished what he was saying relieved that she hadn’t hit him. Although telling her in front of the kids was, well, possibly the safest time to do it and also the dumbest.

“So you are seeing another woman, a counsellor?” Ella muttered once more.

“I have to get my head straight, you know that so yeah, I went to see a counsellor.”

Ella sprang to her feet and shot him a bitter filled look.

“Good for you.”

She turned and ran down the beach and into the sea. He watched her go wondering why he was still sitting there and not chasing after her to make sure she was ok.

“Dada!” Liam called to him waving the plastic shovel he’d been using in the air to try and get his attention.

“Coming,” Roman murmured getting to his feet and walking over to his son. He was once more engrossed with helping his son as they built more to the castle before leaving them to it so he could go get a drink. Reaching into the bag he didn’t notice Ella coming back after her swim until her felt drops of seawater splashing on to him as she reached for her towel.

“Is that all?”

He spun around and met her gaze. She would put down the red rimmed eyes to having just swum but he knew she had been crying and he felt like an idiot for not telling her straight away.

“Yeah,” he answered quickly.

“Ok, we need to tell each other this stuff, no more secrets Roman. I can’t deal with any more secrets, not after, well you going away.”

He nodded before remembering that he’d been on the brink of moving out. He should definitely tell her, he thought opening his mouth before catching the look on her face. He’d never see her look so utterly defeated before. So lost. Or hurt. Reached out quickly he tugged her into his arms and hugged her close to him.

“You’ll get all wet,” she protested.

“Doesn’t matter,” he murmured lowering his head and kissing her.

They broke apart when they heard catcalls coming from Georgie and Sammy as the two boys ran up the beach towards them.

“What do you want?” Ella turned and asked them.

Roman grinned as he watched the way her eyes sought out the younger ones and checked on them before scanning for Meggy and Sophie.

“We’re in need of food,” Sammy murmured, “And we er… wanted to know what we were doing later?”

“Later?” Roman asked frowning.

“They mean they want a BBQ.”

“Ah,” Roman shook his head before he realised that he’d done that.

“Not tonight, maybe in a couple of weeks,” Ella murmured to them seeing disappointed looks on their faces.

“El.”

She turned and looked at him giving him a too bright smile and he mentally called himself a coward. He’d only just got back to being able to be around his kids though, he groaned, defending himself. He hadn’t even spent any time with Miles since he’d been back and groaned as another wave of guilt crashed over him.

“Come on let’s get home and sort out food,” Ella called out.

“Can’t we go to the diner?”

“No!” Roman said sharply.

“Not today,” Ella said after a moment.

Roman looked round his family. He saw his wife who’d he’d been spending months hurting and his kids. He frowned before turning away from them and walking a little way off before collapsing on the sand. He faced the sea watching the blue waves crashing towards him and it felt for a moment like he was drowning. So many emotions were going through him. Guilt. Shame. Tiredness. Fear. Embarrassment. They mixed up churning inside of him until coming out in the tears that fell on to his cheeks.

“You are my hero Dad.” Sammy moved to sit next to him. Just sitting there, not mentioning the tears pouring down his face and he felt even more humbled than by the soft spoken words. “You went away to save us but then, when you knew we needed you more you came back.”

“You’ve always took care of us Dad,” Georgie murmured sitting the other side of him.

“True,” Meggy added sitting close, “And it must have been torture for you when Sophie went on a date without you being here.”

Sophie groaned and pushed at her sister before she sat down too and looked at him.

“Thanks!” Sophie muttered before looking at her Dad. “We get a lot of things from you Dad, loyalty, independence,”

“Standing up for each other,” Meggy added.

“Looking after one another,” Sammy murmured.

“My drawing.”

“And my cooking,” Sophie grinned.

“I remembered you plaiting my hair when Mum wasn’t well,” Meggy said quietly.

“I remember you coming and helping me get back to sleep after a bad dream.”

Sophie smiled at Sammy before looking at her Dad.

“You are always there for us Dad, our hero. You make the bad stuff go away, even if it’s bad dreams.”

“Yeah,” Meggy agreed with Sophie. “And we love you.”

“Loads,” Georgie said gruffly.

“Did your mother put you up to this?” Roman muttered before wiping his face.

“No I didn’t. Kids go and pack up everything for me.”

He turned and looked at Ella before watching all the kids move off. Sophie stopped by the twins and Lily and Liam collecting up their toys and leading them up the beach.

“El, I..”

“Kids love you Roman, now come on we need you to cook us food,” she murmured softly.

“See, you only want me because I can cook…” He said as he stood up.

“No, the sex is pretty good too,” she said softly.

Roman looked at her his mouth open in shock before he laughed and pulled her into his arms.

“I love you Elizabeth Louise Laura Addison Harris!” he muttered before he kissed her.

“Love you too,” Ella responded and kissed him back.

She hooked her arm around his waist and walked up the beach with him towards the kids. Within minutes they’d packed up everything and were in the car heading home.

[TelephotoMarigold]

Chapter 132

Ella sat on the bed. Three weeks of lies. Three weeks of lies she thought again, three whole weeks had gone by since they’d spent that day on the beach and she’d asked him outright if there was anything else. He’d been lying to her. How could he even be in the same bed as her when he’d been off searching for houses? She glanced at her watch again and frowned. He was due home any minute and she wasn’t quite sure what she was going to say to him. Just as she thought that she heard his car pull up on the drive outside and tensed. Her tension increased when she eventually heard his footsteps on the stairs. They grew closer until he opened the door and moved into the room.

“What’s going on?” he asked, “Where are the kids?”

“Your mortgage advisor called.”

Silence.

Then, “El,” he cried out horror struck.

“Don’t call me that. You are no longer allowed to call me that.”

“Look..” he began.

“I asked if there was anything else and you lied to me, and continued to lie to me for the past three weeks. I’d convinced myself that we were going to be ok. But every time you kissed me it was a lie, every time you made love to me it was a lie.”

“I love you Ella,” Roman cried out, “I didn’t..”

Ella stood and looked at him.

“Love? Well you have a funny idea of love.”

“Please…”

“Please, Roman? Please what? Please accept that you went into witness protection without talking to me? Please accept that you lied to me after I asked you not to do it to me again?”

“Please give me a chance to explain,” he begged huskily.

He was disturbed by the way her voice was so calm. Her eyes were dry. Not that he wanted her to cry over him, he hated it when she did, but he was scared now by the way she was so composed.

“No. I’m done.”

Ella looked at him before walking past him and out of the room. She made her way down the stairs and away from him needing the space.

Roman watched her walk out of the bedroom and groaned. She was right. He’d lied. He’d made love to her when he was keeping something else secret from her. She’d had every right to be mad at him except she wasn’t angry, her voice had been calm.

The decision made he strode over to the wardrobe and pulled out a bag and began packing. It was easier this way. He’d stop hurting people, he’d stop hurting his family. Even as he was cursing himself for being a coward he grabbed all he could fit into the bag before going into the en suite and collecting his toiletries. Adding his washbag on top of the bag he zipped it up and carried it out of the room and down the stairs.

He didn’t see Ella as he walked quietly out of the front door and over to his car. Putting his bag in the back seat he frowned looking at the car seats before climbing behind the wheel and setting off. He didn’t even look back at the house.

Ella put down her cup on the table next to her as she heard the car start up. She stood quickly and moved into the house. She glanced at the open front door before racing up the stairs. His side of the wardrobe was open and she saw that he’d taken his clothes with him. He’d left her. He didn’t even have the decency to talk to her before he went. Well no more. She’d take no more.

“Mum, what’s happening?” Sophie murmured from the doorway.

She turned and looked at her daughter seeing the way her mouth was dropping open as she took in the missing clothes from her dad’s side of it.

“Sophie…” Ella began.

“He’s gone? He’s just gone? Again?”

Ella wanted to say something, anything. “He’s…” She began.

Sophie shot her a look before turning around and running up the stairs to the attic rooms. Running after her daughter she caught her just as Sophie was about to blurt it out and pointed to the little ones that were also in the room watching the DVD she’d asked them to put on. Moving over to the sofa she accepted the space that Georgie made for her and reached for the remote.

“Guys,” she began feeling the catch in her voice, “Your Dad has left us for a while. As you know he’s been going through some things and he needs to spend some time with his counsellor.”

Her eyes sought out Sophie’s and she begged her not to contradict her.

“Mama?” Lily murmured puzzled.

Tapping her lap she lifted Lily up and sat her there before explaining in a way for the younger babies to understand.

“We’s still see Dada?” Liam asked slowly.

“Of course we will,” Sammy murmured, “Isn’t that right Mum?”

“Yeah,” Ella said slowly.

“Oks,” Lily nodded and slipped off her lap and going back over to where the twins were.

Ella nodded and eased up off the sofa and slipped out of the room leaving them to it. She heard the film coming back on and the murmur of voices as they began to talk amongst themselves as she headed down the stairs. She continued on going into the kitchen and looking round at the tops. Her eyes blurred with salty tears and she blinked them back before going to the fridge and checking what was in there.

Giving up on the idea of cooking them something she reached for the phone and ordered pizza. With garlic bread and salads and then added curly fries and onion rings to the order before she managed to stop herself. Looking up in the doorway she caught Mike standing there looking at her.

“He’s gone?” Mike asked.

“Sophie?”

“She texted me.”

Ella nodded.

“He’s gone,” she confirmed.

“Mum,” He began.

It was the pity in his voice that did it, although there was anger there too, but the pity broke through whatever defences she had left and she burst into tears. He moved over to her and held her in his arms giving her the strength temporarily to withstand the pain she was feeling until she composed herself once more.

“What are you going to do?” Mike asked her quietly.

“Divorce,”

“You can’t get through this?”

Ella shook her head.

“Not this time. There’s something missing between us.” She looked at him and saw the expression on his face. Loss that mirrored hers and the same confusion that was on the other kid’s faces. “He’s still your Dad,” she murmured quickly.

“I know.” Mike said slowly, “Just.. well… thought you’d be ok.”

“We will be, all of us, just right now, we’re not meant to be together. Now I’ve ordered enough food for an army. Do you want to get Gabby and Danni and bring them over?”

Mike nodded and after a few more minutes of talking he slipped out the back door and went to fetch the others.

Ella waited a heartbeat before she reached for her phone. She saw that there were messages from Nic and Aden and replied to them the best she could. They had been giving her and Roman space since the siege at the diner and she thanked them for it and asked that they respect her feelings now and do the same. No, she’d said politely, she didn’t think there would be a chance for her and Roman to sort this out and didn’t realise how the calmness of her voice was affecting people the other side of the Bay as they tried to come to terms with what was happening.

Months later she packed up the last of his stuff and organised for it to be delivered to him before looking round and changing things. It needed to look different. The house needed to be renewed. The spaces on the bookcases in the study where his books had been got filled with other books and photos. The vase from their wedding had got put away in the back of the cupboard. It was all just things. With memories attached. The kids hadn’t even protested when she took down his pictures. She’d left them to one side in a box for a few days and saw that a couple disappeared. One was found in Lily’s room and the other in Sammy’s.

It was different than before. When she’d received notification that he was dead she’d wanted to surround herself with him. To remember everything. Now. Now she didn’t want to see things they’d bought together, or pictures that reminded her of what they had lost or thrown away.

The kids took it hardest. They hated him for a while. She let them. It was their way of dealing with things. Georgie took over and she let him do that too. It helped stabilise them being able to be reliant on each other and work through their issues without feeling like they were bothering her all the time. For her part she tried to keep things light, she didn’t tell them what was going on in the bitter meetings Roman and her had sorting through the divorce, where everything was thrown at the other person.

She knew now why Hate and Love were considered two sides of the same coin. She had loved him with everything in her and forgiven him things she didn’t think she could but now, for the way he walked out, for the year he let them think he was dead, for the pain on Sophie’s face when she saw his things missing she hated him with as much passion as she had loved him.

[TelephotoMarigold]

Epilogue.

Three months later.

“You shouldn’t be here,” Ella muttered looking over at Roman.

“Yes, I know,” he shot her a grin and then smirked as she flushed. “Did you really need to get a restraining order out on me?”

Ella nodded forcing herself to resist folding her arms, or worse, apologising.

“El,” he murmured unsure what to say, he’d planned it all out in his head. First, he would apologise and then thank her for the furniture and his things. The pictures and albums had been particularly poignant as he removed them from the tissue paper as he unpacked them. He told himself he was imagining the scent of her perfume drifting up from the items as he placed them in his new place but now, here he was standing in front of her, on the front porch of the house he was signing over to her in the divorce, and he could smell the familiar mix of flowers and musk that made up her favourite perfume.

He hadn’t expected it to hurt this much. That seeing her, being so close to her but unable to reach out and just hold her hand would rob him of breath and thought. Would chase away his carefully practised words until all he wanted to say was that he missed her.

“You should go,” she murmured.

“I’m sorry.”

Roman cursed silently at the blurted out word. He tried to tell himself it was a habit he picked up from her but he knew that when it came to Ella he was just so used to telling her everything. Everything except how bad he’d been feeling since going into Witness Protection and facing Alexi. Killing Alexi. Not even the counselling had taken all the pain away.

“I’m sure you are,” she whispered before stepping back inside the house.

“El, God, no, don’t tell me you are scared of me?” he muttered reaching out an unsteady hand towards her. What expression had crossed his face, he wondered, when he’d thought of Alexi. What had made her step back? “Look, well, please.” He breathed out slowly.

Ella shook her head before stepping backwards once more. She turned suddenly and walked along the hallway and then into the kitchen, congratulating herself for not even checking to see if he was following. Moving to the stove she reached out and stirred last night’s chilli that she was reheating for her lunch.

“What do you want to say?” She asked finally.

“I’m sorry,” he murmured again, “I guess, I didn’t expect us to break up.”

“How did you expect me to cope Roman? To keep being your whipping boy? When you were the one who left, and you know I wouldn’t have wanted you to kill Alexi,”

“But you went with him El, that gets to me, it’s like….”

She turned and gave him a look.

“Lily was there? Do you suggest that I scream and fight in front of her? She didn’t need to know…”

Roman groaned as Ella trailed off again and swallowed. But it wasn’t just that, it was the fact that her hand had covered the spot on her stomach where Gardy had cut her with the knife.

“I thought that once in the other room I could fight,” she finally admitted, “But it was like I was frozen. And you keep throwing that at me. You keep going back to that. I can’t keep feeling like a victim, not with all the other stuff we were going through.”

Roman staggered back as he thought about what he was going through and comparing that to Ella and what she’d been going through.

“Anyway, we didn’t make it.” She shrugged as though that was just a simple fact and didn’t rip her heart out of her at seeing him again and realising there was more than just hate she was feeling now.

“I want to see the kids El, I was hoping that we could talk without lawyers and sort out visiting.”

Ella nodded before switching off the cooker and looking at the chilli. She sucked in a breath and released it slowly before asking. “Have you eaten?”

Roman had to close his eyes to prevent tears welling up in them at the simple question.

“No,” he said huskily.

She busied herself sorting out two bowls of the chilli, adding sour cream and cheese to the top before handing him the bowl and a spoon. Walking past him she moved into the dining room and stopped as she looked at the table. It had a covering of papers on it that she was going to go through as she ate. Narrowing her eyes at her impulsive invitation she stepped lightly past the table and over to the sofa choosing to sit at the far end of one of them and pulling up a cushion to cover her legs as she curled them around her.

Roman watched her for a moment before he went and timidly sat near her, his eyes flicking to watch her as they ate the food in silence.

“Ella,” he began after some time had passed. Reaching out he placed his empty bowl on the table before turning to look at her.

“The Kids,” she said to direct the conversation to them. She couldn’t go back on anything, she told herself sternly, and ignored the way his body spray was curling around her senses or that she’d noticed how he’d missed a bit at his morning shave.

“Yes, I was hoping that you’d let me have them for a weekend.”

Ella nodded even as she sucked in a slow breath. She needed something to do to allow her thinking time so she stood up and moved into the kitchen with their bowls hoping that Roman wouldn’t follow her. Her hopes were dashed when she spun around and bumped into him, unaware that he was right behind her.

“Steady,” he gasped out his hands on her arms.

He felt her shudder at his touch and moved to pull his hands away but he caught the look in her eyes and she bit her bottom lip. His body reacted to the unspoken invitation and even as he was bargaining with himself that it was only going to be a kiss, his lips descended on to hers and he was lost.

Ella felt the warmth of his hands on her arms, before the flutter of his breath floated across her lips. She knew that he was going to kiss her, and if he kissed her they would make love. She couldn’t let him. But then his lips found hers and she leaned closer to him, she felt the tentative touch before his lips captured hers fully and the kiss deepened. On and on it went, lasting for eternity and making her heart pound so loudly that she thought he’d be able to hear it.

And then the kiss stopped and she immediately mourned its loss. Looking up at him she saw the same gobsmacked expression on his face that must be on hers and within moments he reached for her again and pulled her closer to him before lifting her up and with her secure in his arms he carried her out of the kitchen and along the hallway before reaching the stairs. Barely glancing at them he strode up them and along until he reached their bedroom.

There were some exquisite fumbles as clothes were removed amid kisses and caresses before they lay back on the bed. Everything was new and intense but familiar and easy at the same time. And then later, when they were still once more, Roman felt like his heart would burst with love. He was home, they could forget the divorce, forget the break up and he could move back in. It was what he wanted. As he made plans inside his head he didn’t notice Ella’s emotional withdrawal from him until she sat up, curling the sheet around her to cover her nakedness.

“I won’t stop you seeing the kids,” she told him in a cold voice. “But this, this coming over and doing that, well it stops. I don’t want this, I don’t want you. Get dressed and leave.”

Roman shot up on the bed before swinging his legs to the floor. Glancing at her, the set of her shoulders and the tilt of her head robbed him of words. Something had gone wrong in the few minutes they had lain entwined after making love and he didn’t know what it was.

“Ella,” he finally said.

“You can see yourself out, from now on the only time you should come here is to pick up the kids.”

She stood and with a fragile grace moved through to the en suite the door closing behind her and he heard the bolt sliding in place as she locked the door.

Angrily grabbing his clothes he pulled them on and stormed out of the house and over to his car. He was halfway towards his new home when he had to pull over to make way for the emotional tears that shook his frame all too aware that he was now missing his heart.

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