The Result

[elikell]

Story Title: The Result

Type of story: oneshot

Main Characters: Multiple characters

BTTB rating: G

Genre: Drama-esque

Does story include spoilers: No

Any warnings: No.

Summary: Someone is waiting for the result of a pregnancy test. But who? And what will the result be?

I wrote this for the last quick fanfic contest but ended up going with something else. So I thought I would post it on here. Let me know what you think

The Result

How has this become my life? Waiting for an answer. After all I learnt at school, I never expected this to happen to me. I mean, me, pregnant? What would I do? None of this made sense. I only just left school. This couldn’t be happening to me. Not me. Not now.

My mum’s gonna kill me if this is positive. After all I’ve put her through, now this? What am I gonna do? She insisted on me taking this test when I finally confided in her. I’d pushed her away for weeks, afraid of what might be happening to me. But she stood by me. She told me that no matter what happens we would deal with it together. No matter what happens? What does that even mean? I love her, and I don’t know what I would do without her. I’m so glad she’s here with me.

I feel sick, I can’t stand this anymore. I feel like my heart is beating out of my chest. I can’t breathe. I was told to breathe into the brown paper bag the test came in to keep myself calm. I can’t let mum into the bathroom, no matter how much I want to. This is something I need to do on my own, no matter how old I am.

I keep thinking back to when I was a kid. I used to love playing on the playground with my friends. I hope I can be a great mother. There’s nothing I wouldn’t do for my child. Nothing.

I need to throw up. I’m so grateful that the bathroom is tiny and that I made it to the toilet in time. I don’t want to be pregnant. What am I meant to do? As much as mum says that it’ll be okay, how can it be? I don’t know what I’m meant to do with my life. This isn’t fair.

I’m sitting on the bathroom floor, my back against the bathtub. As much as I try to hold back, the tears escape my eyes before I could stop them. I put my head in my hands and before I knew it, I was crying inconsolably. I couldn’t stop, even if I wanted to. My life, no matter how this test came out, had changed. I couldn’t go back to where I was before, not that I’d want to. I was a horrible person. Which is why I now find myself in this situation. I just want to be me again. Me before I became this terrible person.

I can hear mum outside the door, waiting for me to unlock it for her. But I can’t do that. If this is going to be my life, I needed to work out how to deal with things in my own way. It just might take me a while. I can’t even bear to look at the test, even before the results are in. What am I meant to do? All I can do is hang my head in shame at the position I put myself in. This is my life, and I may have ruined it.

I don’t want to think like that, and if I am with child, I need to not think like that. I don’t want to admit it out loud, but I’m beyond scared right now. No matter how this turns out, my life has changed. For better or for worse. And I don’t know how to handle that. I really don’t.

I looked at my watch. Five more minutes to go. I keep telling myself that I can do this. My friends and family will help me. This is Summer Bay after all. We help each other out in times of need. It sounds stupid, but as long as I’ve got mum, I think I’ll be okay. I hope I’ll be okay.

I try to take a few deep breaths to help calm me down. The worst part about this whole thing is the waiting. At this moment, my life is on hold. My entire future is sitting on the bathroom counter. I can’t do this.

I want my mum, but at the same time I don’t. I should be able to handle this on my own. I got myself into this situation, I should be able to get myself out of it. Or at least handle it on my own. I know my mum would be with me in a heart-beat, but I need to do this my way, on my own.

Two minutes to go, and all I want to do is crawl under a rock and die. Or at least cry. I can’t even begin to think of my life with a child. I’m the person who always said I wouldn’t have children. I was glad when my doctor told me that my chances of getting pregnant naturally were low. What if this is my only chance? I don’t know what to do anymore.

I’m pacing the bathroom, waiting nervously for what lies ahead. Whichever way this goes, my life is now different in so many ways. I really don’t know what I would’ve done without my mother. She’s been incredible throughout this whole thing. I never thought she’d look at me the same way again. But we sat down and read through the info in the pamphlet together; one line is not pregnant, two lines is the opposite. I didn’t know what I wanted to see.

The timer went off on my watch. I stopped dead in my tracks and turned to face the bathroom counter. I took a deep breath and looked down at the test. A tear escaped my eyes before I could catch it. Shock ran through my body.

I unlocked the door and my mother rushed in. She held me tightly and looked down at the test result.

‘Ruby,’ Charlie said. She squeezed me tightly as tears fell down my cheeks.

‘Mum, I know I should be happy, but somewhere inside me I’m sad. I think I wanted to be pregnant because I knew how unlikely it was,’ I sputtered. I fell against my mother in uncontrollable sobs. ‘I’m so sorry mum. I didn’t...’ I trailed off. Words escaped me. I could never apologise enough for what I’ve put her through.

‘It’s okay Rubes,’ mum soothed. She rubbed my back gently.

‘I love you mum,’ I whispered.

‘I love you too sweetie.’

The test lay on the counter-top; a single line ran through the window.

Comments