Distance and Time

[charmed60]

Thank you so much Carina, kitkat, Red Ranger, freckleface, Kirsty and Suzanne. I've been so eager to post that chapter for ages so I'm glad I had that response. Hope you enjoy the next one

“Jack I think we should do it…” Rachel suggested tiredly, her eyes firmly focused on her fiancé. She cringed as the numerous cuts and bruises she’d missed before became evident to her and a chill ran through her spine as she thought about how much pain he would have felt upon impact.

“Are you insane?” Jack screamed back; “we don’t know what kind of side effects this trial could have, anything could happen to him.” He was furious, how could she even begin to think that allowing his father’s body to be used as some sort of medical experiment was a good idea.

“What, like putting him into a coma?” Rachel realised she’d probably spoken a little harsher than she should have but in all honesty she didn’t know what the right thing to do was. Had this not been her fiancé lying in front of her she wouldn’t have hesitated suggesting that the trial was worth a shot. But she wasn’t just a doctor in this situation and it wasn’t just a stranger they were talking about; it was the man she loved. She knew all of the benefits of the trial but what if something did go wrong? It would be her fault.

“Have a little faith in him…he could still wake up” Jack continued to argue; his arms waving animatedly in front of him.

“He’s been in a coma for around fourteen weeks now Jack, if he was going to wake up he would have done by now. Maybe he just needs us to give him a little helping

hand” she softened, trying to also convince herself that it was the right thing to do.

“I just can’t agree to it” Jack bit back. “They haven’t even told us the extent of his injuries; of how he’s going to be when he does wake up…”

“That’s because they don’t know” Rachel interrupted, gulping against a hard lump in her throat which had formed. She kept forgetting that there could be permanent damage; sometimes she let herself get carried away with the thought that either Tony was going to stay in the coma or he would wake up perfectly fine. She forgot that there was a grey area in between and it frightened her to the core.

“Well they should know; they’re doctors. I can’t agree to anything when I don’t know all the facts and they’re just rushing us to decide” Jack fumed, the anger and frustration bubbling in the pit of his stomach.

“That’s because these things need to be done quickly Jack, the trial needs to be done soon or he won’t be eligible. He could be lying like this for years” she choked, pushing the thought out of her mind and squeezing his hand gently, silently willing him to wake up.

“You’re just sticking up for your own kind; to hell with the consequences it could have on Dad right?” Jack breathed heavily as the anger caused him to say something he instantly regretted. He saw the horror flash across Rachel’s eyes as soon as he’d said it and felt sickeningly guilty.

“I’m, I’m so sorry” he stuttered, his voice filled with remorse. “I didn’t mean it…I just got angry.”

“It’s fine” Rachel mumbled, bringing Tony’s hand up to her lips. She turned her head away from Jack and forced a cascade of curls to cover her face; she didn’t want Jack to see her cry at the hurtful words he’d just said.

“I meant what I said though, I won’t consent to this.” Jack winced at the awkwardness which had suddenly grown between him and Rachel and seeing her not talking to him upset him. “I’m going to…get a coffee or something” he muttered, desperate to escape from the situation and find his wife; he needed to talk to someone who would understand his point of view.

*********

“He’s just through here...”

“Jack” Lucas screamed as he pushed past the nurse and into the arms of his older brother. “Where is he, where’s Dad.”

“Hey calm down” Jack soothed wrapping his arms around him. Lucas’s whole body was shaking and his fingernails were digging into his brother’s back.

“I just want to see him” Lucas choked, his voice filled with hysteria. He pulled himself away and ran towards the door the nurse had earlier directed him towards and pushed his way into the room.

Jack raced down the corridor after him but when he entered the room he found his little brother collapsed in a heap on the floor, crying hysterically into his hands whilst Rachel stroked his back. As he crouched down next to him Rachel backed away and returned to her seat next to Tony, something which hurt Jack when he noticed that she

didn’t look him in the eye once.

“Is he…when he…sleep…sleeping” Lucas muttered incoherently. “He came back, he…he did…I didn’t think...”

“It’s okay” Jack comforted, his heart breaking at the distress he could see his little brother experiencing. It shocked him; Lucas was reacting more hysterical now than he had done ever since he was told that his Dad had died. No matter what he did he couldn’t stop his brother’s body from shaking and despite numerous attempts, he just couldn’t speak. “We’re going to get him back, I promise you” Jack whispered to him, not noticing the dubious glance from Rachel as she doubted Tony would ever be able to pull himself from the coma alone.

Preview:

Will the trial go ahead?

Rachel is overwhelmed with guilt

[charmed60]

Wow thank you so so much Carina, Red, Danni, Barbara (for your amazingly long reply), Katie and Laura (nice name - thank you for both for your new lovely comments. I'm sorry I made you cry Laura!) It's really interesting to see the different ways you're all interpreting this; I hope you're still enjoying it!

Based on previous experiments undertaken during the trial of Moxillibol in short term coma patients, it is expected that the patient will regain consciousness within approximately six hours of intravenous administration of the Moxillibol 500mg. Rachel read the paragraph over and over in her mind, willing it to happen. After Lucas had finally gained composure, Rachel had asked him whether he’d like Tony to be part of a trial; to which he’d said he trusted Rachel’s decision, seeing as she was the doctor. Jack hadn’t been best pleased at all but had to admit defeat when he realised it was two against one. It had been exactly seven hours, 13 minutes and 43 seconds since the Moxillibol had been administered Rachel mused as she read the prescription information leaflet and Tony hadn’t made any improvements. His brain activity was still minimal and his hand which she was clutching tightly in hers was as limp as it had been previous to the trial. She blinked back tears as they stung at her eyes, trying not to let the rapidly fading hope disappear completely. Jack was sitting opposite her, silently willing his father to pull through whilst Lucas sat in a chair behind her, tightly placed against the wall as if he wanted to avoid any close contact. She wondered if they were thinking the same thing as her, giving up hope on him just like she was. Jack probably secretly wanted to say I told you so and was wishing they’d listened to him whilst Lucas was surely regretting ever agreeing to what Rachel had wanted to do, regretting ever allowing himself to hope that things could be okay. And Rachel hated herself to; maybe if she hadn’t been so persistent he could have come out of it on his own?

It broke her heart to see him lying so still, a tube lodged firmly in his mouth and down his throat whilst a machine assisted him with the extra oxygen he couldn’t get himself. It’s not right she muttered sadly to herself; Tony was such a strong man; he’d raised two children all by himself and had always been the protector, to one to look after people, to look after her. Yet here he was now, lying helplessly miles from their home and he wasn’t even able to open his own eyes.

A gurgling sound suddenly emitted itself from Tony’s mouth, breaking Rachel from her thoughts and causing her to instinctively jump upright.

“Tony” she shrieked, looking desperately at Jack to see if he’d heard the same thing to. His fearful eyes didn’t give much away and as Lucas dashed to stand next to her, panicked; she wondered if she was just hearing what she wanted to hear. However almost as immediately as that thought came, it disappeared as she reminded herself that if she was right before then she would be right this time to.

Another gurgled sound caused Rachel’s heart to beat faster and tears began pouring down her face as she felt his fingers moving slightly and then his jaw widen as he made efforts to breathe by himself.

“Get it out” Jack screamed, his voice filled with terror as he watched his father try to breathe as well as try to deal with the shock of seeing him come out of his coma. Lucas was stood next to him, his eyes wide with fear as he watched Rachel desperately try to remove the tube and place an oxygen mask over his face.

“Tony, can you hear me, it’s Rachel” she cried, trying everything she could to keep her voice as calm and clear as possible. She stroked the side of his face as he began moving his head gently and his eyelids fluttered slightly, causing her to take a deep breath in.

“Dad” Jack called out hysterically as Tony moved his head towards him briefly, before returning to face the opposite way. His eyes opened momentarily and Rachel looked straight at him, smiling uncontrollably as she gushed about how much she’d missed him. He didn’t seem to see hear her however and he closed his eyes again, despite Rachel pleading with him to keep them open.

“Come on Tony, open them again for me” she begged; “we’re all here for you, me, Jack and even Lucas. Did you hear that? Your little boy’s come to see you just like you wanted.”

“Luc” Tony muttered softly as the corners of his lips lifted in a slight smile and he moved his hand slightly away from Rachel, searching for his youngest son.

“Dad” Lucas cried out, finally finding the voice he’d lost. He grabbed his father’s hand tightly and began sobbing as Rachel moved out of the way and encouraged Lucas to stand in her place.

“Stand here sweetheart, where he can see you” she whispered, trying desperately to conceal the disappointment she felt that Tony had made no gesture towards her. She watched as he also squeezed Jack’s fingers and forced himself to open his eyes and look blearily at his two boys. Feeling like she was intruding on a private fatherly son moment, Rachel slipped quietly out of the room and shakily lowered herself into a nearby chair where she could finally let her emotions show.

**********

“Rach?” Martha questioned as she sleepily stumbled around the corner and found her friend crying hysterically into the sleeve of her cardigan so as to try and drown out the noise of her cries. “Oh no what’s happened?” she added, fearing the worst as she quickened her pace and sat down in the chair next to her.

“He’s awake” Rachel spluttered, not caring how she looked as her hair became matted and stuck to her face against her wet tears. “He’s actually awake.”

Martha gasped, her eyes widening as a beaming smile appeared on her face. “That’s fantastic” she gushed; using all of her willpower not to run straight into the room and throw her arms around him. Her brow suddenly creased in confusion. “Why aren’t you in there with him?”

Rachel fiddled with the end of her cardigan, picking at the loose seams as her breathing calmed down and her tears quietened. “I’m scared” she admitted, a feeling of shame and guilty washing heavily over her. “I’m afraid that he’s going to hate me for what I did. The last thing I ever said to him…”

“Rachel he is not going to hate you for that” Martha interrupted, squeezing her shoulder. “It was a silly little argument that got blown out of proportion; he’s not going to hold a grudge.”

“You don’t understand” Rachel insisted as she looked slowly up at Martha. “When he woke up and I was talking to him, he didn’t…he didn’t even acknowledge me. He looked directly into my eyes and…” Her throat suddenly constricted as she choked on a sob which felt like it was waiting to come flooding out. “He looked away. He didn’t even want to look at me he was so hurt by what I’d said.”

Martha closed her eyes in sympathy. She knew how much guilt Rachel had been carrying around ever since it had happened but found it really hard to believe that Tony would have purposely done that.

“Listen to me” she began soothingly, “he’s just woken out of a coma Rach; he was probably feeling woozy and confused and didn’t know where he was or what he was even looking at. You’ve been through hell lately and you’re tired; you haven’t slept in days or even moved from that chair by his bedside. You’re emotional and you’re going to see things that aren’t really there.”

Rachel stared at a black mark skidded across the shiny floor of the hospital and tried desperately to believe what Martha was saying to her, whilst also trying not to take offense at her round about way of telling her she looked awful. “You didn’t see the way he looked at me” she choked, “how can I get him back just to lose him again?”

“It’s okay” Martha comforted as she wrapped an arm around Rachel and let her cry into her shoulder. “”You’re not going to lose him, everything’s going to be fine.”

Preview:

Tony's family spend valuable time with him

Charlie makes a shocking discovery

[charmed60]

Thank you so much Red Ranger, Barbara, Kirsty, crazylazy, Carina, Suzanne and Danni. Your comments are as always appreciated especially as you all put so much effort in! Thank you A bigger update here to show my appreciation

“It’s okay Dad, we’re here” Jack whispered, smiling at his father who was still sleepily drifting in and out of sleep. “Maybe we should call the doctors, let them know.” Jack looked up as his little brother didn’t respond and snapped his finger in front of his face, noticing his distant look.

“Err, sorry” Lucas stuttered; “let’s just stay with Dad a bit longer.” He couldn’t get what had happened out of his head, his Dad had reached out for him, had smiled when he knew he was there. It was only a tiny smile but he was sure that he saw it.

“Hey boys” Tony groaned, his voice barely a whisper as he struggled to speak. He swallowed hard, trying to understand why his throat felt like it was on fire and looked around him as much as he could despite fatigue overpowering his body.

“Morning” Jack replied cheekily, still unable to clearly process the fact that the Dad he thought he’d buried was looking up at him and speaking; albeit weakly. “How are you feeling?”

Tony fluttered his eyes open again and winced as he tried to look upwards; the pain in his head was unbearable. “Sore” he grinned, wondering if it was an obvious response. “What happened?”

“Why don’t you just rest for now” Lucas spoke for the first time, noticing his Dad struggling to keep his eyes open. “We’ll explain everything later.”

“Yeah, it might take a while” Jack grinned, winking at his younger brother.

“Rachel” Tony suddenly breathed as if he’d had a sudden realisation; “where is she?” He forced his eyes open as widely as he could and looked slowly around him, despite the nagging pain which consumed his whole head. “Why isn’t she here? She’s, she’s okay isn’t…”

“Hey, she’s fine” Jack answered quickly, trying to force him to stay still. “She must have gone outside, she was here just a second ago…”

“I want to see her” he mumbled, faintly smiling with relief.

“We’ll go get her” Jack assured, signalling for Lucas to follow him as he kissed his Dad on the head. “I missed you” he whispered.

“Yeah, me to” Lucas replied, furious with himself that he couldn’t just say the words he wanted to say. It was like something was paralyzing his tongue and just as he attempted again to say it; Jack tugged on his arm and guided him towards the door.

******************

Rachel shakily held her hand over the handle and took a deep breath, willing herself to push down and open the door. This is what you’ve been waiting for her she mentally encouraged herself but the guilt was so heavy it consumed her. When Jack had come over and said that Tony wanted to see her she’d felt her heart begin to race and she froze in her seat. Was that a good thing or a bad she asked herself. There’s only one way to find out…

“There you are” Tony croaked as he opened his eyes slightly to find her standing timidly by the door, the arms to her cardigan pulled over her hands. He stared at her, waiting for her to come towards him but she didn’t move, even when he weakly unclasped his fingers and held out his hand for her. “I thought you might have got bored of waiting for me to wake up, found yourself another bloke.”

Rachel laughed lightly despite the tears trickling down her cheeks. “I would never do that.”

“Aren’t you going to come over here” he questioned, breathing a silent sigh of relief. As much as he was joking, a part of him was seriously worried when he’d noticed that she wasn’t there. He didn’t even know how long he’d been unconscious for although Jack’s reaction and the fact his youngest boy was there told him it had probably been a while. “Rach” he prompted, his forehead creasing in confusion. It wasn’t until he’d turned his head further around and squinted his eyes that he noticed she was crying.

“I’m so sorry” she sobbed, her speech a mix of raspy breaths and spluttered words. She moved slowly towards him despite the fear in her chest but when he held out his arms and she noticed the concerned expression on his face; it was enough to let her know that he wasn’t angry with her.

“It’s okay” he hushed, noticing her cries become more intense as he wrapped him arms tightly around her. “Why are you sorry?”

“I was wrong” she cried, savouring the feeling of being nestled into his chest. She never thought she’d get to feel this again, to have him stroking her hair and comforting her. It was so surreal yet felt just like it did before but she couldn’t help feeling terrified that something was going to happen to take him away from her again. “I hate myself so much” Rachel continued hysterically as she dug her fingers into his chest; “I don’t care how we get married or where I just don’t want to ever lose you again. You must hate me…”

“Hey stop” Tony insisted pertinently, “I have never once hated you, why would you say that?”

“Because I was so horrible to you” she replied ashamedly, feeling undeserving of him and the way he was being so nice to her. “I should never have let you leave the house; if I hadn’t have shouted at you none of this would have happened.”

“Shh” Tony soothed, rubbing circles gently on her back and leaning his chin on the top of her head. “It’s okay, this isn’t your fault. I was the one who left the house…”

“Yes because I hurt you” she interrupted, sitting up slowly so she could look at him; a way of reminding her that he was really here. “I thought I was never going to see you again. I always hoped I would but then after we buried you or what we thought was you I realised that you were never coming back and it made me realise how much I love you. I never want to feel like that again, I never want to lose you again; you have to promise me you’ll never leave. Please.” Rachel breathed deeply and awaited his response nervously, watching his eyes flit from side to side as he took in all that she had said.

“You…you buried me?” he gasped; “I don’t understand.”

“There’s so much you need to know” Rachel replied, grinning to herself that after her huge emotional declaration of love; that was all he responded with. “But first I need you to promise me that you’re not going to leave me again.”

“I promise” he smiled, taking her hands and kissing the back of them as she breathed a sigh of relief and held him tightly again; thanking silently to herself whoever it was that had brought him back to her.

***************

Charlie stared at the phone in her hands; visibly shaken from the conversation she’d just had with her co-worker. She didn’t understand how it had happened; DNA results had come back positive, he’d assured her. Once the shock had subsided she moved the phone to her ear and attempted to call him but was greeted by the familiar sound on his answer message which caused her to curse and throw the phone on the kitchen side.

“Get out of bed the wrong side this morning darling” Angelo chuckled as he strolled in through the door whistling and moved towards Charlie in an attempt to peck her on the cheek.

“Where the hell have you been?” Charlie seethed as she moved her face away, the anger she was feeling was palpable and she couldn’t bear the thought him touching her.

“At work” he replied, his eyebrow raising at her suspicious behaviour. “Why what’s happ…”

“The DNA results for Tony’s body; where are they? I want to see them” she interrupted, her eyes wild with fury.

Angelo’s body froze; his mouth open wide as he quickly tried to think of how he could answer her without raising suspicion. “They’ve gone into erm, storage. I sent them off a few weeks ago.”

“You didn’t scan them onto the system?” she quizzed, her arms crossed defiantly in front of her.

“I asked Joseph to so they should be” he swallowed, hating the fact that he was lying through his teeth. “He’s on holiday though so, we’ll have to wait until he gets back.”

“Stop lying to me Angelo” Charlie erupted. She could tell he was lying, she knew him too well and it made her feel sick to the stomach.

“I…”

“Jack just called me, apparently Tony’s not dead. He’s in a hospital in the City and he’s just woken up from a coma so the person you identified as being our friend wasn’t him” she rambled, hot tears streaming down her cheeks as the realisation that Angelo had been lying to her began to set in. “How did this happen Angelo? How did our friends go through all of that unnecessary pain?”

Angelo felt his cheeks burn with shock, embarrassment and shame; how could Tony be alive, he saw his body? He took his wallet from his hand. He stared into Charlie’s eyes and the hurt he saw behind them broke his heart; he couldn’t keep lying to her anymore. “The station has been having some financial difficulties lately; they’ve been trying to keep it under wraps.”

“What’s this got to do with Tony?” Charlie screamed, feeling frustrated that he wasn’t being directly honest with her.

“DNA tests are expensive…”

Charlie gasped loudly and flew the back of her hand to her mouth, bile rising to the front of her throat. “Don’t you dare tell me that you didn’t do the test because you were trying to save money” she gulped, her hands shaking with a mix of emotions.

“It would have been pointless” Angelo breathed; “a waste. We found Tony’s wallet in his hand, it was obviously him”

“Except it wasn’t, was it Angelo” Charlie shrieked. She couldn’t even recognise him anymore, couldn’t believe that he would put an attempt to save money behind the welfare of his friends. “How could you do this?”

“I’m sorry” he replied sheepishly.

“I’m not the one you need to be apologising to” she replied bitterly through gritted teeth; “you can go and explain this to Jack right now. Get in the car.”

Preview:

Rachel is thrilled when something exciting and eventful happens

Charlie is angered by Angelo's actions but is about to learn something even more horrifying

[charmed60]

Thank you so much Katie, Laura, callyha, Red Ranger, Danni and Kirsty - comments appreciated as always if any of you have any wishes for this story let me know here or through PM and I'll try to accommodate; I've caught up with everything I've pre-written now so it's possible

It had been two weeks since Tony had woken from his coma and the doctors had finally agreed to let him go for a walk outside; with Rachel’s careful observation which she’d dutifully promised. It was a beautiful sunny morning and the bright light was a shock to Tony who squinted immediately as he exited the doors to the hospital.

“Oww” he exclaimed, bringing his hand up instinctively to shield his eyes.

“Are you okay? Is it your head? Maybe we should go back inside” Rachel suggested, obvious worry littered in the tone of her voice.

“No, it’s just the sun it’s bright” Tony chuckled, kissing the top of her head as she wrapped her hand around his bicep and leant on his arm.

“I’m sorry, I know I’m being overprotective” she winced, squeezing his hand tightly.

“It’s okay, it’s actually kind of cute” he whispered, squeezing her hand affectionately. They walked slowly along the grassy path; Tony limping slightly as he used his legs for the first time in months.

“I hope Jack forgives Angelo for this whole thing. It’s a shame you know, they used to be so close” Tony muttered sadly, his mind wandering to his eldest son who’d been so consumed with anger in recent days. Angelo’s attempt to explain and apologise hadn’t gone smoothly and had ended in security escorting them both from the building after Jack lunged at him and a brawl occurred.

“Yeah well I can understand if he never speaks to him ever again; I know I won’t be” Rachel bitterly replied. “I won’t” she exclaimed as she noticed Tony’s disapproving look. “You have no idea what it felt like to be told that you’d been killed, to have to organise your funeral and watch what I thought was you being lowered into the ground. It was…so painful and horrible” she gulped, tears stinging her eyes at the memory. “If he’d have done his job properly, none of us would have had to go through that. We could have been with you the whole time.”

“I’m sorry” Tony apologised; “it makes me angry to; just thinking of you and my boys going through that. But” he hesitated, “I’m sure he’s beating himself up enough about it.”

“Good” Rachel spat; “I hope he never has a decent night’s sleep again.” Tony breathed in deeply, figuring it would be better to let her carry on feeling the way she did; she’d always been pretty stubborn.

“So…” Tony drew out, attempting to make conversation out of the awkward silence that had befallen. “What are you going to do about the job? Technically you’re meant to be working here.”

“Erm, I’m not sure” Rachel hummed, “I’ve been so consumed with being with you that I hadn’t even thought about it; they probably wont want me back though after my hysterical display. I nearly ended up in a straight jacket” she giggled; finally being able to see the funny side of the situation.

“I wish I could have seen it” Tony mused, a smirk on his face as he tried to imagine Rachel fighting off the security guards. “You should ask though Rach, it’s an amazing opportunity for you.”

“Maybe” she answered hesitantly; “although I’m not sure I want…” Rachel paused immediately and brought her hand up to her stomach, hovering over it as she tried to process what she was feeling.

“Rach are you okay??” Tony questioned, moving himself to stand in front of her in case she fell.

“Oh my G…it’s the…” She looked up at Tony’s concerned expression, a beaming smile on her face until it suddenly occurred to her; he didn’t know.

“Rach” he prompted, feeling uncomfortable as she stared incredulously at him.

“I can’t believe I … completely forgot” she laughed; “you should sit down.”

“No, I don’t wanna sit down” Tony insisted, his voice shaking; “I want to know what’s going on, you’re scaring me.”

“It’s nothing to be scared about” Rachel soothed; taking a deep breath in order to control her nerves. “Tony…”

“Yes…” he replied, shaking his hands animatedly in an attempt to encourage her to speak faster.

“We’re…” she swallowed a lump in her throat away and smiled nervously; “we’re going to have a baby.”

“You’re kidding me” Tony shrieked before becoming embarrassed at his dramatic reaction; “wha…are you sure?”

“I’m positive” Rachel beamed as a single tear trickled down her cheek. She never thought she’d get to experience this, to tell her fiancée that she was having his baby; that they were going to be parents together. “I’ve known for weeks but I’ve just been so overwhelmed by what’s happened with you that I forgot until…the baby, it just kicked.” Rachel felt a surge of maternal love rush through her and the baby became even more of a reality; which further strengthened as Tony placed his hand delicately on her stomach.

“We’re going to have a baby” he breathed, his eyes brimming with tears and pride. “We did it Rach.”

“Yes we did” she cried, reaching forward and wrapping her arms around him, holding his head as he nestled into her neck.

“Have you had a scan yet?” she heard his voice muffle.

“Yeah I have but I’ve got another one in a couple of weeks” she explained, “it’ll look like a proper baby this time.”

“Can I be there?” he smiled, completely overwhelmed that he was going to be a father again.

“Of course you can” Rachel shrieked in reply; “I’m not letting you out of my sight, you have no choice.”

“Good” he whispered; “because I wouldn’t be anywhere else.”

************

“Charlie, please talk to me” Angelo breathed as he stood behind his fiancée who was fervently tapping away at the keyboard; wincing as he attempted to touch her shoulder but was immediately brushed off.

“I have nothing to say to you” she spat; not even looking at him. Her mind was totally focused. Ever since Angelo had opened up about what he’d done she was intent on tracking back, on seeing when the deceit had started and how far he had gone.

“You don’t understand” Angelo sighed frustratedly. “When you’re in a superior position in the force like I am; the decisions you have to make aren’t always right morally or ethically. But you have to do what’s best for your team…”

“Don’t you dare try and excuse yourself for what you did” Charlie barked in anger. “It was wrong on every single level Angelo. Jack is your friend, Lucas is still so young and Rachel…she tried to kill herself. How would you have explained that to Tony if he’d woken up and she was dead because of what you told her?”

Angelo closed his eyes in defeat. He knew that what he’d done was wrong; he never meant it to get so far but he was seriously worried about the financial situation inflicting the station. His bosses were coming after him, wanting explanations and he knew his job was on the line if he couldn’t find a way to fix it.

“I had to do what I thought was best” he sharply whispered, trying to keep his voice constrained when he noticed the other police officers watching them. “Charlie” he prompted as she began her silent treatment once again. “What are you doing?”

Charlie found the file she was looking for and nervously clicked onto it; noticing Angelo’s body stiffen in the corner of her eye.

“Why are you looking at that? I’ve told you everything” he shakily claimed as he tried to pull the mouse off of her and shut down the file.

“Oh my…” Charlie gasped. “You put my name down as one of the officers to identify the body” she gagged; “how could you?”

Angelo stuttered; his cheeks turning a bright shade of red. “Because I knew you’d cover for me if I ever got found out” he guiltily admitted; his head bowed down in shame.

Charlie attempted to reply but couldn’t find the words to say. “You are supposed to be my fiancée, you’re supposed to love me” she cried; tears pouring down her cheeks; “how could you betray me like this?”

“Charlie” Angelo replied, his heart sinking in his chest. “I didn’t betray you, I didn’t think anyone would ever find out.”

“Yeah well you know what” she replied bitterly; anger taking over as the predominant of her emotions. “I won’t defend you Angelo; if I get asked, I’ll tell them exactly what you did.”

“No Charlie please” he replied frantically, reaching out for her desperately but it was too late; she’d left. He ran his fingers nervously through his hair and tried to come up with a plan to fix everything but he didn’t know where to start. He couldn’t lose Charlie but he couldn’t lose his job either; he’d worked too hard for it. What was he going to do?

Preview:

Tony's excitement leads everyone to make a sad discovery

Lucas reveals the real reason he thought his Dad didn't love him

[charmed60]

Thank you so much Carina, Red Ranger, Katie, Suzanne, Laura, callyha and Kirsty - your comments as always are so appreciated. And Carina honestly don't worry if you forget to comment, I appreciate you taking the time to even read it

“I wonder what we’re having” Tony mused excitedly; Rachel grinning by his side as she listened to him ramble enthusiastically along the hospital corridor. “I think I’d like it to be a little girl; I always wanted a daughter” he beamed; “but you know it’s okay if it’s a little boy, at least I know what to do with them.”

“Well we can find out next week if you want to?” Rachel questioned, her heart lifting as she heard Tony speak so excitedly about their baby, he’s going to be an amazing father she remarked to herself.

“Really? Oh wow I don’t know” Tony stuttered; “a big part of me does but then maybe we should let it be a surprise.” Rachel gazed up at Tony and smiled to herself when she saw the serious look on his face as he debated to himself over what to do. She moved her hand forward to open the door to his room when he jumped in front of her and pushed it open.

“Let me get that for you” he offered as he held it open for her and then rushed across the room to move the chair next to the bed. “Sit down” he encouraged as Rachel stood by the doorway; a suspicious look on her face.

“Why are you being weird” she laughed, moving over to open some windows. “It’s so hot in here…”

“Rach, I can do that” Tony interrupted, moving towards her. “You go and rest; you’ve just had a long walk, you must be exhausted.”

“No, I feel fine” she sighed, rolling her eyes as she remained stationary in her spot. “Tony I’m pregnant not sick, you don’t have to fuss over me so much.”

“I’m sorry” he apologised, placing his hands either side of her arms. “I just want to look after you and our baby.”

“You can” she smiled, wrapping her arms around his waist. “But please don’t treat me like a china doll or I’m going to end up getting cranky and that won’t be good for any of us okay?”

“Okay I wont I promise” Tony smiled, kissing her softly on the head as she nestled into his neck. “You know I was going to offer you a foot massage next but seeing as you don’t want to be fussed over…”

“No, foot massages are good” Rachel objected, her eyes pleading with Tony. “Our baby would very much like Daddy to give Mummy to have a foot massage please…”

“Hey, you’re back” Jack interrupted as he strolled into the room with Lucas; “I came in earlier but the Doc said you’d gone for a walk.”

“Yeah we just went and got some fresh air didn’t we love” Tony grinned as he looked down at Rachel, his arm wrapped around her shoulders.

“Why are you grinning so much” Jack questioned, his eyebrow raised in suspicion.

“Rach told me about the baby” Tony babbled excitedly. “Isn’t it amazing.”

“Oh yeah it’s great” he replied, smiling happily for his Dad. “Actually Rach, can I have a word with you outside?”

“Sure.” Rachel gave Tony a peck on the cheek as she instructed him to have a lie down after their walk and followed Jack out of the door.

“Now whose being fussed over” Tony muttered under his breath, wondering what that was all about.

*********

“I just wanted to make sure everything was okay between us” Jack questioned nervously, aware of the tension there had been between them for the past couple of weeks.

“Oh Jack it’s all in the past, honestly” Rachel insisted, surprised that he was still holding onto it when she’d forgotten there ever was a problem.

“Good” he replied, breathing a sigh of relief. “I’m sorry for what I said…”

“Jack you were scared. I was to. I think things got out of hand on both of our parts so, just for the record; I’m sorry to.”

“I just keep thinking what would have happened if we hadn’t gone ahead with the trial…”

“You can’t think like that Jack” Rachel interrupted. “He might have woken up without it who knows. What matters is that he’s here and he’s perfectly fine. They think he’ll be

able to go home in a few days as well.”

“Wow that’s great” Jack smiled, amazed at the speed of his recovery and relieved that things were okay between them again. “Thanks Rach.”

“No problem” she smiled as she headed back into Tony’s room.

“Hey mate” Tony beamed as he saw his eldest son stroll into the room and perch himself on the end of his bed. “Where did you two get to?”

“We were only in the corridor. Have you been listening to the Doctor and taking it easy?”

“Well I was…” Tony started, “but I just went for a walk with Rach and she told me about the baby. Isn’t it amazing? I can’t sit still now, I’m so excited.”

Jack froze as a strong sense of déjà vu washed over him however as he looked at Lucas and Rachel’s shocked faces; he realised he wasn’t alone.

“Why has everyone gone quiet?” Tony questioned, laughing nervously. “Am I missing something?”

“You already told me about the baby” Jack answered hesitantly.

“No I didn’t” Tony replied immediately, “I haven’t seen you yet today and Rach only just told me.”

“You don’t remember just telling Jack before? Just after you offered me a foot massage” Rachel chuckled lightly, trying not to worry him when deep down her heart was sinking.

“No, I, I remember we came back from the walk” Tony backtracked, trying to relive the past few minutes. He gazed around the room and his eyes stopped at Lucas. “When did you get here?” Tony felt his heart begin to thud as panic washed over him and the sympathetic and worried looks from Rachel and his sons made his cheeks burn red with embarrassment. “I need some fresh air” he muttered, the shame becoming too much as he ran out of the door, slamming it shut behind him. He could hear them calling after him but he ran as fast as he could, he didn’t understand what was happening to him; he was sure that he hadn’t told Jack already, he would have remembered doing it; wouldn’t he?

************

Lucas paused for a moment and breathed in deeply, trying to catch his breath as he bent over and placed his hands on his knees. He’d ran along the whole corridor and there was no sign of his Dad. It had taken a lot of persuasion to encourage Rachel to stay back at the room; she was worried sick and ranting about how he wasn’t allowed to be on his own yet but Lucas knew his Dad. He knew that he needed some time alone and Rachel fussing over him would only make things worse when he was clearly shaken up. Lucas tried not to imagine what it actually meant, what the consequences of him forgetting a whole conversation would be and so to block out the fear he focused on trying to find him. Running down the stairs two at a time he began to wonder what he was going to say when he found him but the sight of him sitting half way down a flight, his head in his hands, stopped Lucas in his tracks.

“Hey Dad” Lucas timidly whispered, sitting down gently on the step next to him.

“Hey mate” Tony mumbled in reply, not bothering to look up as he fixed his attention on his hands in front of him. “I, er, tried to get outside for some air but my head started spinning and I couldn’t see anything in front of me so I had to sit down. This is where I ended up. How pathetic is that?”

“That’s not pathetic” Lucas replied sincerely. “You’ve just come out of a coma Dad, you can’t rush things.”

“Did I honestly already tell Jack that I knew about the baby?” he interrupted, looking hopefully at his youngest child, praying desperately that there’d been some kind of mistake. However the sympathetic look he received back told him everything he needed to know and he choked as tears caught in his throat. “How can I not remember?” he sniffed; “it’s so humiliating.” Anger suddenly washed over him and he stood swiftly up on his feet, thumping his fist into the wall but a wash of dizziness once again rushed through his head and Lucas had to guide him back down to the step. “Damn it” Tony screamed in frustration; “why can’t I do anything for myself.”

“Dad stop it” Lucas begged as he saw tears form in his father’s eyes. “I get that you’re scared and frustrated and you don’t know what’s going on. But everything’s going to be okay. I promise.” Lucas gripped his Dad’s hand and squeezed it tightly, smiling reassuringly at him as he saw the evident fear in his eyes.

“I’m really scared Luc” Tony admitted hesitantly. “I don’t know what this means, I mean what if it gets worse? What if I get up one day and don’t know who you are; you’re my son, I don’t ever want to forget you.”

“You won’t” Lucas reassured, his heart lifting at the words his Dad was saying. “You’ve got to be positive; maybe it was just a one off. You did get hit on the head pretty hard.”

Tony smiled at his son’s optimism but a sinking feeling in his chest told him it was something more than that. “You know you’re a smart kid; I don’t think I ever really told you that.”

Lucas looked at his father in surprise, wondering if he’d heard him correctly. “No you didn’t” he admitted mournfully.

“I’m sorry…”

“Can I ask you a question?” Lucas interrupted; his hands shaking as he took the opportunity to ask the question he’d been wanting to ask for months. “Why didn’t you reply when I sent you my script?”

Tony’s brow creased in confusion and he stuttered in reply, asking his son what script he was talking about.

“I sent you the master copy of my book a few months ago; I managed to finish it but I wanted your opinion before it got sent to print” Lucas explained. “But you never replied.”

“Luc, I never got your script” Tony gasped in surprise, “Don’t you think I would have contacted you if I had? I’ve been waiting for you to publish this thing so that I could be the first one to buy a copy.”

“You didn’t get it?” Lucas felt his heart tighten as a horrible realisation swept over him; he’d been angry at him for nothing. He felt sick as he thought back to all the horrible things he’d said about him, the shameful things he’d echoed in his head about his own Dad and it was all for nothing. “I thought you didn’t like it, didn’t like me.”

“Don’t you ever think that” Tony shrieked as he pulled his son into his arms and clutched his hair with his hand. “You’re my son how could I hate you? I’m so proud of you Luc, of what you’ve achieved and the person you’ve turned out to be. You and Jack are my absolute pride and joy don’t you forget that.” Lucas smiled to himself through tears as he felt his Dad run his hand over his back and pat it comfortingly. All this time he’d hated him for nothing, he felt like he’d wasted so much of his life feeling angry when he never needed to be. He just wished he’d asked him earlier then none of this would have happened.

“Come on we better get back upstairs, you know what Rach is like she’s probably freaking out and calling security to come and find me” Tony chuckled lightly. “You okay to help your old man up?”

“Yeah course” Lucas smiled as he took his Dad’s arm and supported him as he stood up slowly and limped gently up the stairs. “I love you Dad” he breathed out quickly before he could chicken out.

“Love you to son.”

Preview:

Angelo is called in to explain the DNA mishap; will he confess all or will he use someone else to take the blame?

Tony discusses his fears with the doctors

[charmed60]

Thank you so much for the comments Carina, Red Ranger, callyha and Laura. You're all so lovely More will be explained about Tony's condition now...Carina your comments I am bearing in mind

“Sergeant Rosetta” a voice bellow out behind Angelo as he sat at his desk still trying to come up with a plan. “Can I see you in my office” his boss persisted; “now.”

Angelo smiled politely and took a deep breath as he followed him into his air conditioned room, sitting down on a seat opposite the desk. “What can I help you with” he questioned; trying his best to sound curious despite knowing exactly what he was going to ask.

“I wanted to speak to you about your involvement in the Holden case” his superior began; “I take it that due to your personal involvement you’ve been informed that he isn’t as…dead as we were first led to believe.”

Angelo chuckled nervously; “yes I heard. I went to visit him in the City a couple of weeks ago, he’s doing really well.”

“Well that’s good” he replied with a hint of resistance. “But I’m interested in knowing how this mistake was made in the first place. Look let’s drop the formalities and speak man to man here; I’m going to be honest with you okay. Jack’s asked for there to be an investigation, he believes that you might have had some involvement in a cover up…”

“What” Angelo shrieked. “That’s ridiculous, I had nothing to do with it.”

“You were there at the crime scene weren’t you” his superior questioned.

“Yes, yes I was but I was too busy dealing with the injured victims so I asked…” Angelo hesitated, wondering whether this was the right way to save his career. He knew

Charlie would cover up for him, despite her earlier outburst. “I asked Charlie if she could assign one of our superintendents to the case. When I heard that they’d found Tony’s body I again asked Charlie to get someone to deal with the formalities so we could go and inform his family.”

“I looked through the database online” his superior muttered, “Charlie’s name was on there a signing officer for the DNA results.”

“Really” Angelo answered unconvincingly. His palms began to sweat and his mouth instantly became dry as he tried desperately to appear convincing. “So you’re saying she was involved?”

“It appears that way. Do you know anything about this? Honestly?”

“N, no” Angelo stuttered, “I had no idea. But I can’t believe she would.”

“Well seeing as you Jack and Charlie are the only three officers in the station high enough to be able to input this data; and it’s obviously not going to be Jack. That just leaves you or Charlie.”

Angelo paused, wondering whether it was fair to let Charlie to take the blame for something he’d done. He loved her and didn’t want to see her hurt but at the same time he’d worked for too many years to get where he was. It would take far too long for him to ever be able to get back to where he was now whereas with Charlie, it would be easier. She wasn’t as high up, in a few years she’d be back to her position now and everything could be forgotten about.

“Well it wasn’t me, I can assure you” Angelo replied, a sickening feeling hitting the bottom of his stomach. This was the best way he was sure of it; Charlie would understand.

************

“There you are” Rachel exclaimed, breathing a sigh of relief as she spotted Tony walking towards her, his arm around his youngest son’s shoulders. She ran forward and wrapped her arms around his middle. “I was so worried about you.”

“I know, I’m sorry” he apologised; “I just needed some space.”

“It’s okay, I understand” Rachel smiled, her heart breaking at seeing him so upset. “Mr Wallis wants to talk to you, shall we go now? Get it over and done with?” she added, trying to sound positive.

“Actually” Tony hesitated, “I’d like to go on my own if that’s okay?” He looked up at Rachel and despite her nodding, he could see the hurt in her eyes and he instantly regretted it. “I’m sorry…”

“No no it’s okay” Rachel smiled, holding back tears as she stroked his back and watched him walk alone into the Consultants office.

“Don’t take it personally” Lucas comforted as he saw a single tear fall from her eye. “He’s just really embarrassed about what happened.”

“Why” Rachel cried, her voice shaking. She hated that Tony was pushing her away; she wanted to help him, to comfort him and heal the pain he was going through. She wanted to reassure him that everything was going to be okay.

“Because he hates being a burden on people, you know what he’s like” Lucas continued. “Once he knows what’s going on he’ll talk to you.”

“Yeah you’re right. Thanks sweetheart” Rachel smiled, wiping her tear away. “Gosh you’re so much like your Dad with all your words of wisdom” she giggled.

“Thanks” Lucas smiled proudly. He realised that it was the first time he’d ever felt happy when someone had compared him to his Dad and he hoped that this would be the beginning of a new chapter for him. He didn’t want to feel angry anymore, it was time to move on.

************

“So what does this mean?” Tony nervously asked, weaving his fingers in and out of each other as he tentatively listened to the doctor.

“It’s impossible to say, we’d need to do more tests” Mr Wallis replied honestly. “It’s possible that you might just be suffering some after effects of the coma but I have to be honest with you; it’s more likely that the knock to your head has resulted in some damage to the part of your brain which controls your memory. How extensive that is we won’t know until we do some scans, how do you feel about that?”

“Yeah sure” Tony mumbled in reply, trying not to let the tears he could feel welling up inside him show. He was terrified and suddenly regretted not letting Rachel come in with him; what if it got worse he asked himself. “Can I just ask you a question” he breathed shakily, clearing his throat in another attempt not to cry.

“Of course” Mr Wallis replied as he lifted his head from the notes he was writing in.

“I’ve got two kids” Tony choked “a fiancée and a little one on the way.” He paused for a moment as he tried to gain his composure, twiddling his thumbs together in an attempt to distract himself. “Am I going to be able to look after them?”

“What do you mean” the doctor replied softly, sensing his distress.

“I just want to know that I’m going to still be able to do my job properly” Tony replied, his vision blurry as tears filled in his eyes. “I don’t want my family to be burdened with having to take care of me or help me do everyday things. It’s my job to look after them.”

“Mr Holden” the specialist began as he rose from his seat and sat on the edge of his desk in front of Tony. “Whilst I can’t guarantee you anything, it’s not likely that your condition is going to worsen. It’s more likely going to be a long term thing that we will help you to learn to cope with, to work around. I highly doubt you’re going to need to depend on your loved ones for anything other than emotional support” he assured, smiling encouragingly.

“Good” Tony breathed happily, “that’s really good. That’s just what I wanted to hear thank you. Although, does this mean I won’t be able to go home this week now?”

“Let’s just do the CT scan first and we’ll go from there” Mr Wallis suggested, collecting the file in his hand and guiding Tony to the door. “Make sure you talk about this with your family, be open with them about how you’re feeling, it’s the best way to deal with this.”

“I will, thank you” Tony smiled, breathing in deeply as he prepared himself to explain everything to Rachel, Lucas and Jack. Just when everything had seemed to be perfect and Tony had been able to envisage his future his world had come crashing down around him. He suddenly didn’t know how to imagine his life anymore and it frightened him to the core. Despite the doctor’s assurance he still couldn’t shake the fear that things were going to get progressively worse. But he knew he couldn’t think like that, he had to be positive for his children and especially for Rachel; she was worried enough about him as it was. He didn’t want to put any extra stress on her especially not while she was pregnant and so with a forced smile on his face he strolled into his room and assured her that things were fine, the doctors weren’t worried at all.

Preview:

Charlie is horrified to when the police turn up looking for her

Tony has a visitor before making a heartbreaking discovery

[charmed60]

Thank you all so kindly Danni, callyha, Red Ranger, Kirsty , Laura and Katie. Your comments are as always very much appreciated.

Charlie gazed out at the ocean from the wooden bench situated on a tiny cliff and tried to understand how her life had suddenly turned. A few weeks ago she was happily engaged to a wonderful man who she believed would do anything for her and life couldn’t have been more perfect. In a day it had been turned upside down and all of a sudden she was left wondering whether she ever knew her fiancé at all; whether the man she’d promised her life to actually ever did love her. She still couldn’t process what Angelo had done, it was like it was all a horrible dream that she was yet to wake up from. Knowing that he would falsify legal information which affected their close friends was one thing but to learn that he had involved her made her feel physically sick.

“Senior Constable Buckton” a voice bellowed officially behind her, breaking her from her daydream as she quickly wiped tears from her cheeks. She turned her head to find two of her co-workers standing with their arms straight by their side, looking at her with guilty looking expressions.

“Hey guys” she weakly smiled; “what’s with the formalities, you can just call me Charlie.”

“I’m sorry but this is official business” Constable Avers replied as Charlie noticed him avoid direct eye contact. “We’re really sorry but we need you to come to the station with us.”

“But I’ve got another half an hour of my lunch break left” Charlie quizzically replied, her eyebrow raised in suspicion. “I’ll be there before two I promise.”

“No we need you to come now” the other police officer interrupted. “I’m sorry to do this but we have no choice; Charlie Buckton, you’re under arrest for the…”

“I’m what” Charlie shrieked, standing upright and resisting forcefully as the two burly men moved towards her and placed handcuffs across her wrists; reading her rights to her. “No there’s got to be some kind of mistake” she continued, “what am I even be arrested for?”

“We have reason to believe that you’ve been falsifying legal documents” Constable Avers regrettably informed. “I’m sorry but you know we have to do it Charlie, it’s just

our job” he added quietly, guilt evident in his voice.

Charlie nodded slightly, almost too shocked to continue to resist against their grip. She followed them meekly to the awaiting police car and sat in the back seat behind the iron bars; laughing ironically at the fact that she was sitting this side of them. Thoughts flashed through her mind as she tried to understand what she was being accused of; what legal documents were they referring to? However as if a light bulb had sparked up inside her head, her thoughts turned to what Angelo had said to her and with a rush of nausea to her stomach she realised that it was her own fiancé who had turned her in. The man who was supposed to love, honour and protect her. As a single tear fell from Charlie’s eye she leant back into the leather seats and wondered why she ever trusted him when all he’d done was hurt her. He’d broken her heart and she knew right there and then that whilst she still loved him more than anything, she would never be able to forgive him.

*********************

“Welcome home mate, it’s really good to see you looking so well, how are you feeling” Elijah complimented as he shook Tony’s hand. Rachel had organised for a few of their closest friends and family to come round on the day that she finally brought Tony home, partly as a way of letting him know how loved he was but also as a means of distracting him from the doctor’s diagnosis. It had been partially inconclusive; whilst there had thankfully been no obvious significant damage seen to his brain from the CT scan, Tony’s constant repetition and continuous forgetfulness was a daily occurrence that the doctor’s weren’t able to treat.

“I feel good” Tony smiled brightly, “especially now I’m home; I feel like I’ll finally be able to get back to normal. Although I guess that’s never really going to happen…”

“Hey” Rachel interrupted sternly, wrapping her arm around Tony’s back. “We all thought we’d lost you, this problem is nothing compared to that. What matters is that you’re here and you’re safe” she gushed, snuggling into his chest. “Plus you were never really normal were you my love.”

“Hey watch it” Tony joked, squeezing her tightly as Leah and Elijah laughed at their playful banter.

“We’ll leave you both to it” Leah commented, aware that they would probably want some time alone together.

“No wait, before you go” Tony interrupted; “Elijah I just wanted to thank you so much for what you did for my family while I wasn’t around. Rachel told me how much you helped her, it really means a lot to know that she was taken care of, thanks mate.” Tony held out his hand and was curious when Elijah stared at him in shock, hesitant to shake his hand. “I haven’t already thanked you have I?” Tony added hesitantly.

“No, no you haven’t” Elijah quickly answered, aware of his friend’s insecurity; “sorry I just, well I didn’t really do anything, you don’t need to thank me.”

“Are you kidding me” Rachel exclaimed. “Elijah if you hadn’t have said what you did to me, I don’t think I’d have been able to go on. Just knowing that one day I’d be able to see Tony again, it gave me hope.” She could feel tears threatening to fall yet was desperate not to cry in front of them again. “Although I have to admit I didn’t think you’d work that quickly, actually bringing him back from the dead” she joked before looking up at Tony, “Maybe we should start going to Church? If that’s not a divine sign then I don’t know what is.”

Elijah smiled gratefully, finally accepting that he was able to comfort Rachel in her time of need. It was a revelation to him, a sort of wake up call which made him realise that he was able to make a difference in people’s lives without even knowing it. He felt like he’d let Rachel down but maybe his words had planted a seed in her mind and like Bishop Pitt had said, she needed to hit rock bottom to pull herself up again.

“Well it’s been lovely to spend time with you but I need to go; I have a sermon in the morning that I need to prepare for” Elijah smiled, shaking Tony’s hand confidently as he breathed a sigh of relief. Watching how happy Rachel was and knowing that he was able to play some part in it made him finally feel secure about what his mission in life was. “See you later” he called as he turned towards the door and walked straight into a young woman before apologising profusely.

“Oh it’s okay, no harm done” she waved off before turning her attention to the man relaxing on the couch; the man she’d come to know as her father. “Tony” she sobbed, her emotions reaching a peak as the realisation that he was okay finally hit her.

“Mattie” he gasped, his sleepy yawn turning into a beaming smile as he shot up from the couch, ignoring the slight dizziness and embraced her in his arms. “Hey it’s okay sweetheart” he whispered as she cried into his shoulder, gripping his t-shirt tightly. “It’s so good to see you again, I didn’t know you were coming.”

“Rachel called me yesterday” she spluttered, “I can’t believe you’re actually here.”

“I’m sorry I didn’t call sooner, I just didn’t want to disrupt your exams. How did they go? Oh and where’s Ric?” Rachel questioned as she stood up and placed her hand on the small of Tony’s back. She knew he didn’t like being fussed over as much as she didn’t like it either but she couldn’t help but feel nervous about him being out of her sight or pushing himself to much so she tried to keep an eye on him as much as she subtlety could.

“He’s just getting our stuff out of the car and they went okay, I think” Matilda nervously replied; “hey look you’ve got a little bump now.”

“Yeah” Rachel smiled, looking down at the tiny neat shape which made her feel so proud. Before it hadn’t seemed real and she couldn’t help wondering if maybe they’d made a mistake and she wasn’t really pregnant at all; despite the scans. However since she’d started to feel flutters as the baby moved inside her and her stomach grew in

size daily; it reassured her that she was going to be a mother after all. “It all goes downhill from here” she laughed, running her hand gently over it.

********************

“Oh come on, how did you miss that; it was a beauty” Tony sighed in frustration at the television, wincing as Rachel, who was dozing in his arms stirred. “Sorry love, didn’t mean to wake you.”

“It’s okay” Rachel sleepily mumbled; rolling her eyes as she noticed his favourite surfing tournament program was still on. Usually by now she’d have been fighting with him over the remote; desperate to watch anything but men splashing about in the sea but after what had happened, she didn’t care what they watched anymore; as long as he was happy.

“It’s so good to see Mattie again and have her back here” Tony gushed, his attention still firmly on the television, “and to have Lucas home, it’s like my family’s finally together again.”

“I don’t think they’re ever going to leave either” Rachel half joked; “they don’t trust you to keep yourself out of trouble.”

“No more drama I promise” Tony swore, taking her hand in his as he stroked it gently. “I wonder when Murphy’s’ coming on, he’s usually one of the first three” he added, confused as to why his favourite surfer hadn’t been shown on the television yet.

“I think he went second” Rachel cautiously winced; “he came on just as I was going to sleep” she yawned.

“Great” Tony seethed, “now I can’t even watch television without needing you to fill in the gaps for me.”

“Hey” Rachel scolded; “all that matters is you’re…”

“still alive, yeah yeah I know” Tony interrupted, finishing the motto she’d been repeating ever since the doctor’s had told him about his short term memory. “It’s still frustrating though” he sighed, stroking the inside of her wrist. He paused as he tried to work out what he was feeling and as Rachel began to reassure him that he was going to get used to it he lifted up her hand and gasped when he saw the extensive scarring.

“Where did you get this?” Tony shrieked, looking worryingly towards Rachel as she tried to pull her wrist from his grip; shame flooding through her. It took her a while to realise what he was looking at but when she saw his face her heart began to pound; she wasn’t ready to have this conversation with him.

“It’s, it’s nothing” Rachel lied, her voice stuttering as she tried to fabricate a believable story. “I, a glass, I was washing up, it broke.” She gulped and held her breath so that Tony couldn’t hear how nervous she was, how much she was shaking.

“It’s pretty bad” Tony replied as he looked down at it again only to find the sleeve of her cardigan slightly rolled up on her other arm. A similar looking scar was poking out from underneath and as Tony reached down to pull it further up she pulled her hands away.

“They were both in the water” Rachel exclaimed quietly; hating the fact that she was being dishonest to him.

“Don’t lie to me Rachel” Tony shouted, his heart pounding as he grabbed both of her wrists and assessed the damage. “Who did this to you” he growled, looking her directly in the eyes as she gasped at the fury she could see in them.

“No-one” she answered easily, pleased that she at least didn’t need to lie about that. “I just, Tony, please I don’t want to talk about it.”

“Well I do” he replied calmly, “what happened.”

Rachel contemplated what to do, she knew she needed to be honest with him but the thought of talking about it, the thought of admitting what she’d done to him filled her with fear; she was ashamed, she didn’t want him to know. But there was no way out of it, Tony was stubborn, he always had been and once he got an idea in his head he didn’t rest until he saw it carried out. “I did it” she whispered, clearing her throat as it came out as nothing more than a squeak. A single tear trickled down her cheek as she confronted the reality of what she’d done, a memory which had been locked away in her mind as if it was just a terrible dream. “I wanted to be with you” Rachel continued; “I thought it was the only way.”

Tony stared wide eyed back at her, feeling anger pulsing at his fingertips. He stood swiftly to his feet as he tried to process what she’d just told him; so distracted that he didn’t notice his mouth was wide open until he found he couldn’t swallow. “You did what?” he seethed, “you’re not, you’re not saying that…you tried to kill yourself?”

“I’m sorry” she apologised as more tears followed. The anger and shock she saw in Tony’s face frightened her; he’d never looked at her this way before. She stood up so that she was standing in front of him, hating the feeling of suddenly feeling so small next to him. “I couldn’t cope, I didn’t know what else to do.”

“You could have killed yourself” he screamed, grabbing the sides of her arms as she stared back in terror at him. “What about the baby? You could have killed our child, did you not think about him or her while you were throwing your life away.”

Rachel couldn’t speak, it felt like her heart had stopped beating as she repeated his words over and over in his mind. She tried to tell him that she didn’t know about the baby but the shame and guilt had flooded her body like a poison slowly spreading and she couldn’t find her voice. Pushing herself away from him, she forced his hands off of her and ran towards the door.

“Rach, I’m sorry. I didn’t mean it” Tony called as he realised what he’d just said. He grabbed her arm in an attempt to keep her in the house but she was too strong for him.

“Don’t touch me” Rachel cried hysterically as she scrambled towards the door and shakily pulled it open before running away down the street.

Tony flung his hand to his mouth as the full impact of what had just happened hit him. He never meant to shout at her, she was obviously hurting, why had he done it? It was the shock, he couldn’t believe she would do something like that; she’d always been so strong. And with the baby as well, how could she go through with it knowing their baby would die to?

“Tony” Mattie whispered as she peered her head around the doorframe, wrapped up in her pink, fluffy dressing gown. “Is everything okay.”

“No, I.” Tony eased himself slowly onto the couch as he stared at the wall. He was desperate to run after her, it was dark outside and he didn’t want her wandering the streets alone but his legs just wouldn’t move no matter what he did. And he didn’t know what to say to her anyway. How could she do this?

Preview:

Matilda tries to explain things to Tony - will he forgive Rachel?

Charlie confronts Angelo

[charmed60]

Thank you so much Red Ranger, Callyha, Laura, Carina and Kirsty. You all put so much effort into your comments thank you so much

“She was in a really bad way” Matilda explained as she passed a cup of tea with four sugars to Tony, in an attempt to stop him shaking. “Everyone was really worried about her, she stopped eating, kept herself locked away as much as she could. It was like you’d be talking to her but she wasn’t really there, her eyes were glazed over and she’d just drift off. She just didn’t know how to cope without you.”

Tony looked up at Matilda with regret in his eyes; pain as he imagined what Rachel had gone through when she thought he had died. He hadn’t really considered it much, he knew she would have been upset of course but he never once expected that she would go that far. “What happened” he asked hesitantly; as much as he didn’t want to hear, he felt like he needed to understand what she’d gone through.

“I think things just got too much for her” Matilda began to explain, wondering how much she should actually tell him. “She never could adjust to you not being around and Lucas…”

“What about Lucas” Tony interjected, wondering how he fitted into it all.

“Look don’t be mad at him; but the only way he found he could cope was by holding it all in. He got really angry and one day he just snapped at her, started screaming about how she needed to get over you and…he told her she needed to move out. I think by that point she’d just lost all reason for living.” She paused temporarily as she watched Tony’s eyes widen with horror, giving it a chance to sink in.

“Leah said that when they brought her round in the hospital she begged the doctors to let her go so that she could be with you.” Tony moved his hand to his chest as he felt a physical pain radiating around his heart. Tears caught in his throat and he breathed heavily in order to fight them off; he hated to think that she went through that much pain. “I think that knowing about the baby was the only thing that got her through…”

“Wait” Tony interrupted; his voice shaking with the intense emotion he was being overloaded with, “she didn’t know about the baby when she did it?”

“No” Matilda nodded, “no of course not. She found out when she was in hospital, Dr Young told her when she was begging him not to stop the bleeding.”

Tony felt his heart stop beating and guilt rushed through him like a tidal wave; he felt so ashamed of what he’d said to her, no wonder she’d run out like she did. He had to find her he decided, he couldn’t let her go on thinking he was angry with her.

*********************

Rachel closed her eyes gently as the cool breeze whipped across her face and she felt tears which had been stored in her eyes trickle slowly down her cheeks. You could have killed our child. Tony’s words echoed in her mind and she could still distinctly hear the infuriating anger in his voice. The guilt she felt was indescribable, what kind of a mother was she? You’re meant to protect your children yet her baby was only 20 weeks old and she’d already messed up. She buried her face in her hands in order to drown out her sobs, feeling thankful that the beach was empty and she didn’t have to restrain herself from screaming out loud. Why did she have to tell him she asked herself; he didn’t need to know. Everything had been perfect, they were happy and now; now he probably hates me she cried. She removed her cardigan from around her, shivering against the cold and looked down at her wrists; the scars a permanent reminder of what she’d been through. Every time she looked at them she felt an overwhelming rush of emotion flood her body, all the tears she’d cried, the utter hopelessness she’d felt, the loneliness. Her desire to see Tony again, her need to have him hold her in his arms. She cried even more as she thought about her situation now, Tony was here, this time he could hold her but the difference was he probably didn’t want to. Rachel’s body shook with a combination of shock and her reaction to the freezing temperature and she silently apologised to her baby for failing so much as a mother. “I’ve let you down bubba” she cried, “I’m so sorry.”

“Rach” Tony called from a distance as he spotted her huddled up in the middle of the sandy stretch, the tide lapping the shore only a few inches away. “Thank God I found you, I’ve been looking everywhere.” He crouched down next to her and placed his hand comfortingly on her back when he saw the distressed state she was in.

“I didn’t know I was pregnant” Rachel whispered, her eyes focused on the waves as they slowly built up and then faded away. “If I’d have known” she cried before breaking down, moving her hand up to her face in defeated grief.

“Hey it’s okay” Tony soothed, picking up her cardigan and wrapping it around her; “I know, Mattie told me; I’m so sorry, I didn’t mean what I said.” He put his legs either side of her and pulled her close to his chest. “Come here, you’re freezing” he exclaimed as he stretched his jacket over her and rubbed her arms in an attempt to stop her shaking.

“I’m a terrible Mum” Rachel continued, placing her forehead under the crook of Tony’s chin. “This baby deserves better than me…”

“No it doesn’t, don’t you dare say that” Tony gently scolded, placing a soft kiss on her forehead. “Look at all that you’ve had to go through these past few months and yet you’ve still managed to look after our baby.”

“I could have killed…”

“But you didn’t know Rach, how could you have done?” he questioned, cursing himself as he realised his outburst had led to her sudden lack of belief in herself.

“I thought you hated me” she cried, tears streaming down her cheeks. She wanted to wipe them away but she felt so comforted from Tony’s embrace that she decided to let them fall.

“How many times do I have to tell you that I don’t hate you” he soothed, brushing back her hair as it whipped her face in the wind. “I’m sorry for shouting, I shouldn’t have done but I was just in shock and so scared. I just thought how close I came to losing you and it frightened me. If I’d have woken up and you’d have been gone…I don’t know what I’d have done.” Tony closed his eyes in an attempt to block out the terrifying thoughts at the forefront of his mind; thoughts of what could have been.

“We’re like a modern day Romeo and Juliet” she smiled, relaxing into his arms as her body stopped shaking and the tears finally ceased.

“Except we’re both alive thankfully” Tony breathed before placing his hand delicately on her bump. “And this little one’s okay to.” Almost as soon as he touched her stomach he felt a tiny soft kick against his palm to which he instinctively pulled away.

“Woah” he exclaimed, his eyes wide in surprise.

“Did you feel that to?” Rachel gasped, looking up at Tony who was beaming brightly, his eyes sparkling in delight.

“Yeah, yeah I did” Tony rambled, placing his hand back on her stomach. “I felt our baby kick Rach.”

“It was a strong one” she gleamed; her heart fluttering as she enjoyed the moment. She never once bored of seeing Tony’s excitement about their baby but she couldn’t help her mind from sometimes wandering to how things could have been; all these moments he would have missed. She was just so thankful that she didn’t have to go through it alone, she knew she would never have coped without him; he was her rock. She sighed happily and closed her eyes peacefully as she leant back into him and they both waited patiently for their baby to kick again.

*****************

Charlie pulled her legs into herself and wrapped her arms around them, shifting slightly as her back ached against the cold, hard mattress underneath her. Shivering against the cold she blinked slowly, allowing small tear drops to trickle slowly down her cheek and onto her knees. She was waiting to be questioned but it felt like she’d been in the cell for hours, the dark overbearing walls were making her feel claustrophobic and she shut her eyes tightly, trying to block out the fear she felt. The sound of heavy, frantic footsteps increasing in volume forced her top open her eyes and when she looked up her heart seemed to stop; Angelo was looking mournfully at her.

“Why?” she whispered, resisting the temptation to scream at him. If it hadn’t have been for the long iron bars separating the two she knew she would have lunged at him, she wanted to hit him and scream at him for the way in which he’d betrayed her. “How could you do this to me?”

“I didn’t mean for it to get this far Charlie I swear” Angelo insisted, his heart breaking ever so slightly at seeing her looking so vulnerable and scared.

“Then fix it” she begged, hopping off of the bed and moving so that she was standing directly in front of him. “Tell them the truth please Angelo.” She knew that getting angry at him wasn’t going to help her get out of this mess; the only way she had a chance of him changing his mind was to make him feel guilty, to feel sorry for her.

“I, I can’t” Angelo admitted truthfully. “It hurts me so much to do this to you but I can’t lose my job Charlie I’ve worked too hard for it.”

“And what do you think I’ve done” Charlie shrieked, unable to contain her anger anymore. “Do you think I just got given this job straight out of school Angelo? No, I had to work for it, just as hard as you did. You made a mistake Angelo you should be man enough to own up to it.”

“They won’t put you in prison Charlie, I won’t let them.”

“That’s so kind of you” she sarcastically replied. They both looked at each other, tension filling the room as they contemplated their future.

“There is something you can do” he breathed after what felt like hours. “If you admit to it, I will make sure you’re only given a warning, a suspension for a few months at the most.”

“What kind of person do you think I am?” she seethed. “I won’t lie for you Angelo, I told you that before and I’m telling you again.”

“Then I’m sorry” Angelo regretfully replied. “Goodbye Charlie.” He swallowed hard as a barrage of tears caught in his throat and turned away from her, not wanting to look

at the pain in her eyes anymore. He hated himself for what he was doing but he knew he couldn’t lose his job, he had no other choice.

Preview:

Tony's injury leads to tragic events when he's left to question his ability to protect Rachel

Tony and Lucas have a one to one chat.

[charmed60]

Thank you so much crazylazy, Carina and Red Ranger. I know I've said it before but I really do love reading what parts you particularly liked! I hope others are still enjoying this Here's the next chapter!

“Okay so I’ve got down milk, sugar, coffee, beans…anything else?” Tony asked as he sat at the kitchen table; writing down a shopping list so he didn’t forget what to buy.

“We need some potatoes, carrots, oh and could you pick up some washing up liquid, we’re nearly all out” Rachel replied, checking through her bag to make sure she had everything for her first day back at work.

“Washing up liquid, carrots…” Tony repeated out loud as he wrote them down before pausing thoughtfully, “what was the other one again?”

“Potatoes Tony” Rachel breathed irritably, “potatoes, carrots and washing up liquid.”

“I’m, I’m sorry, I remember you saying it now” Tony apologised, his face reddening with embarrassment as it always did when it happened.

Rachel placed a file in her bag and looked over at her fiancé, closing her eyes in regret as she saw the downtrodden look on his face. “No I’m sorry” she apologised, “I’m just snapping because I’m so nervous about work today, I shouldn’t take it out on you.”

“You’ll be fine” Tony smiled, trying not to let how upset he was show. “The minute you get your first patient in it will all come back to you again” he assured.

“I hope so” she replied softly, hating the tension that she felt between them. They were just about coping with his short term memory loss and the majority of the time Rachel was able to brush it off but sometimes, particularly when she was in a bad mood, it irritated her and usually resulted in her shouting at him. She hated herself for it, she knew he couldn’t help it but she was in such a rush this morning and didn’t have time to have the same conversation with him multiple times. “Okay are you ready to

go, I’m going to be late otherwise?” she begged, aware of how close she was cutting it. “You’re going to be with Jack and Luc today aren’t you?” she added. Another reason she was so nervous was because today was the first day she was leaving Tony on his own; she hadn’t left his side ever since she’d brought him home.

“Yes and I will be fine” Tony reiterated as he stuffed the shopping list in the back pocket of his jeans and grabbed his keys.

“Okay” she breathed, knowing that she had to give him time to himself at some point or they’d end up driving each other crazy. “And you can pick me up afterwards?”

“At eight yes” Tony chuckled, pleased that he’d managed to remember something as he placed his arm around her shoulder and took her bag off of her; noticing her

anxious expression. “Don’t worry about today okay, I’ll be fine. I promise.”

*******************

“Hey mate, Jack’s let us down so it’s just you and me today” Tony smiled as he approached his youngest son who was sitting in the Surf Club, drinking a juice with Mattie, Ric, Aden and Belle.

“Great, we can have some precious father son bonding” Lucas joked, downing the rest of his drink and grabbing his surfboard.

“Hey watch it you or I’ll dunk you under when we get out there” Tony replied, messing up Lucas’s hair as he said goodbye to his friends. They walked side by side out into the stifling sunshine and Lucas looked cautiously at his Dad.

“You sure you’re ready to do this?” Lucas questioned, expressing his concern for his father.

“Don’t you start, you sound like Rachel” Tony sighed. He’d been waiting to get back on the board ever since he’d been let out of the hospital and wasn’t going to let anything get in the way of that happening. “Actually speaking of Rach; I wondered if I could have a little chat with you about something?”

“Sure” Lucas replied, holding onto the wooden rail as he stepped down the slope onto the sandy beach.

“I heard that things got pretty…intense between the two of you when I wasn’t around” Tony started, knowing he needed to have this conversation but worrying about what his son’s reaction would be. He noticed his body stiffen beside him and the grip on his surfboard become tighter. “And you told her to move out.” Tony paused as he waited for Lucas to begin talking but a quick glace at his son and it was obvious that he wasn’t about to speak anytime soon. “Look mate, I’m not trying to have a go at you or make you feel bad” Tony continued, placing his arms either side of his son as he forced him to look at him. “I just want to know why you did it, do you not like Rachel? Are you unhappy with us being together?”

“No it’s not that” Lucas timidly replied, “I never meant to upset her, she’s been good to me, looked after me.”

“Then what” Tony enquired, taking a moment to smile at the thought of Rachel taking care of his son despite her own pain. It allowed him to imagine what she would be like when their baby arrived; she was going to make a great mother he thought.

“I got angry when you were gone and she was…always crying. I just wanted her to stop, I wanted to forget about everything, about you. And I couldn’t do that while she was around, I needed someone to scream at and…she was just there.” Lucas shamefully admitted, feeling disgusted at himself that he ever felt that way about his own father.

“I don’t understand” Tony quizzed, “why were you so angry son?”

“Because I hated that you’d left me when you promised you wouldn’t” Lucas admitted, surprised that he felt able to be so open with his Dad. A single tear trickled down his cheek which he swiftly wiped away, not wanting to look so weak in front of him. “And I was jealous of how close you and Jack were, I thought it meant that…” Lucas gulped loudly, unable to say the words.

“That…I didn’t love you as much?” Tony suggested, his heart breaking at knowing how his son had been feeling. “Luc, just because Jack and I have more in common, doesn’t mean that I love him anymore.”

“I know” Lucas admitted truthfully.

“You know you’re a lot like your mother” Tony smiled; “you get your creativity and your sensitivity from her and I love you for all the things you are that I’m not. But you get a lot from me to you know, mainly your good looks.”

Lucas chuckled, amused at how his Dad would always use a serious, emotional conversation as an excuse to make a joke.

“And next time you get angry, try not to take it out on Rachel okay? She might look strong but she’s pretty sensitive to you know.” Tony begged, not wanting to lecture Lucas now he knew the reason he’d acted the way he had.

“I won’t, I’m sorry for what I said to her. I never meant to make her feel the way she did.”

“It’s alright mate, it turned out okay in the end. Right let’s go surf.” Tony pulled his t-shirt over his head and grabbed his board, challenging Lucas to a race into the sea. “Last one in is cooking dinner tonight.”

********************

Rachel pulled her cardigan tighter around her, making a mental note to herself that she needed a new one now that it no longer stretched over her growing bump. Looking at her watch she realised that Tony was now 20 minutes late and as she decided to give him a call, a rifle through her bag alerted her to the realisation that she must have left her phone in the car when Tony dropped her off. She sighed heavily and shivered against the cold; sitting still wasn’t helping keep her warm and so she decided she might as well walk, Tony obviously wasn’t coming.

Her thoughts became distracted by why he hadn’t turned up; the rationale part of her mind was telling her that he’d just forgotten, it’s not like she could be angry with him, he did have an excuse. But the more neurotic side of her mind was panicking, what if something had happened to him? She tried not to let that idea overpower her, he was a grown man, he could take care himself she thought, trying to convince herself more than anything. The long street came to a crossroads and she debated which route to take; the one on her left was well lit and populated but it would take her at least another ten minutes to get home. Another shiver ran through her as the cold wind blew and so she therefore decided on the dark, narrow road to her right, knowing it would get her home into the warm a lot quicker.

Trying not to embarrass herself by admitting that she was frightened; Rachel sped up her pace and looked cautiously around her, jumping as a rustle in the trees next to her took her by surprise. You’re in big trouble Tony Holden she whispered under her breath, keeping her attention focused on the street light in the distance. She distracted herself by running through all the things they had left to buy for the baby in her mind; her and Tony had decided on most of the things they wanted to get but they just hadn’t had time to go shopping. There were also a few extras she wanted to buy but she knew Tony wouldn’t allow it; he already thought she was being far too excessive and kept reminding her that the baby wouldn’t be able to tell the difference between a plain white blanket or an duck egg one with tiny bows hand stitched around the border. She smiled to herself as she tried to imagine what their child would look like and thoughts of their baby asleep wrapped up in the duck egg knitted blanket she managed to persuade Tony to let her have filled her with excitement. She was so immersed in wondering what colour eyes their child would have and whether it was a boy or a girl that she didn’t even have time to react when a powerful force pulled on her bag, sending a searing pain through her shoulder. She reached her hand out instinctively and tried desperately to keep hold of it but the lack of light in the street meant that she couldn’t see anything around her. She could hear what she assumed to be a man’s breath echoing close to her ear and he was screaming something at her but the shock of what was happening meant she couldn’t understand what he was saying; everything had gone fuzzy. Just when she thought she’d managed to get hold of her bag again, she felt an overwhelming pain spread in the middle of her back and she was forced to the floor, her hands instinctively wrapping themselves around her stomach. She tripped on the kerb as she heard another pair of footsteps get closer to her and as her head connected violently with the concrete pavement, everything went black.

Preview:

Will Rachel be okay or will there be devastating consequences?

How will Tony react when he finds out what happened

[charmed60]

Thank you so much Carina, Red Ranger, freckleface, Laura, Suzanne, Kirsty and ashleyjane. I'm really grateful for all your faithfulness and to the new comments to - it's really encouraging. Laura I'll blame Rachel's pregnancy brain for not calling Tony from inside the hospital Because so many of you put the time in to comment I thought I'd update earlier as a little thank you. I hope you enjoy

“You know you were pretty rubbish out there today Dad” Lucas joked as he played with the napkin in front of him, ripping off tiny pieces as he spoke.

“Hang on a minute, I only fell off three times; for someone whose had a brain injury I think you gotta give me some credit” Tony pointed out, sipping the last of his drink from the cup.

“Hey boys, have a good day?” Jack called as he spotted his brother and father sitting in the corner of the Diner; Martha following closely behind.

“Yeah we did” Lucas gloated, glancing over at Tony; “think Dad needs to work on his surfing skills though.”

“Hey, before you get cocky son, just remember who lost the race and therefore whose cooking dinner tonight” Tony grinned, enjoying the playful banter as he looked at his watch. “Actually I’m just gonna pay for these drinks and then we better get moving, Rach is due home anytime soon and she’ll freak out if I’m not there when she gets back.”

As Tony moved out of his seat and pulled his wallet from his back pocket, Jack slipped into his place and patted his brother’s shoulder from across the table.

“So you had a good day little bro?” he smiled, stealing his cup and taking a swig.

“Yes I did” Lucas insisted, pulling his cup back and wiping the straw with the sleeve of his cardigan. “Thanks for giving me the day with Dad though, I really appreciate it.”

************

“Can you open your eyes for me” Rachel heard as her vision became clearer and the first thing she felt was the chill of the wind. She tried to remember what had happened, why she was lying on the cold, hard floor and she flinched as she felt a hand touch her shoulder. “Hey it’s okay” she heard the stranger say; “the ambulance is on its way.” Pain radiated all over the top half of her body and a searing pain was shooting through her head as she wondered where Tony was.

“T,Tony” she whispered, as she looked around her, pushing herself up before a wave of dizziness made her fall back down. Thankfully the man who’d been talking to her caught her before she hit the floor and tried to calm her down as her body began shaking. She reached up to her cheek as she felt something trickle down. It was blood.

“Just take it easy” she heard him soothe, “you’ve got a nasty cut on your head.”

“I want Tony” she cried, confused as to what had happened, why was she here? The last thing she could remember was writing in some notes at the hospital.

“Is that your husband? Do you want me to call him for you?”

Rachel looked around her desperately for her phone but every single move of her head caused things to swim. As she looked down she saw a trail of blood wiped across her stomach and her heart suddenly stopped with an intense fear. “My baby” she cried as her hands automatically stroked her stomach and she begged it to kick just so she could know that it was okay.

“It’s going to be alright” the man tried to comfort as he heard the sirens of the ambulance turn into the road. “What’s Tony’s number and I’ll call him for you.”

************

“Apparently it was Charlie all along” Jack explained to Lucas having just visited the station; “Angelo must have been covering up for her. I don’t understand why…” he was interrupted by the shrill sound of a phone and the vibrations of the table as it rang on top.

“Hello, Tony’s phone” Lucas greeted as he picked up his father’s mobile, noticing that he was deep in conversation with Leah at the counter. His eyes widened as the man on the other end of the phone indicated his urgency to speak with Tony Holden.

“Dad your phone” Lucas called over before Tony asked him to take a message. “I think you should take it, a guy called Adam’s calling; it’s about Rachel.”

Tony’s heart seemed to skip a beat as he wondered what the call could be about. Placing a note on the counter he moved across to the table and greeted Adam, a curious tone evident in his voice.

“I don’t want to worry you, but there’s been an incident” Adam explained, wondering how he could break the news in the most gentle kind of way.

“What’s happened, i,is she okay” Tony spluttered, his heart pounding as he heard the sound of sirens in the background and a bustle of voices. Visions of their car smashed up around a lamppost instantly created themselves in his mind which Tony tried desperately to get rid of.

“She’s pretty shaken up; they’re taking her to Northern Districts now.”

“T,thank you” Tony stuttered, unable to get the words out he needed to say as his mouth had instantly dried. His palms became sweaty and he didn’t even notice that Leah was standing behind him, her hand supporting his back. When Tony looked down at his phone he realised that his hands were shaking and Jack took it off of him out of fear that he was going to drop it.

“Dad what’s happened” Jack gasped, shocked at the deathly pale shade his father’s skin tone had turned to.

“It’s Rach, she erm, there’s been some kind of…oh G, I need to get to the hospital” Tony rambled as he tried to process the phone call he’d just received. He was desperate to get there and wanted to run as fast as he could but his legs couldn’t carry him, he couldn’t force them to move.

“Come on I’ll drive, my car’s just outside” Jack offered as he put his hand on his father’s back, forcing him to move. As Martha and Lucas rushed out behind them, Leah stood in the middle of the diner, her apron still tied around her waist. Her gut instinct was to go with them, if Rachel was hurt she wanted to be there but she was alone in the Diner and knew she couldn’t just leave. Please let her be okay Leah prayed as she helplessly stood frozen to the spot, please let her be okay.

**************

“Rachel, do you know where you are” Derek prompted, noticing her distant, confused look as she sat expressionless on a hospital bed in the Accident and Emergency Department.

“Where’s Tony” she whispered, looking up helplessly at her friend as he sat on the edge of the bed next to her; placing his hands either side of her arm in an attempt to comfort her.

“He’s on his way” Derek reassured as he finished placing a stitch in her head wound which had stopped bleeding. “Can you remember what happened?”

Rachel shook her head as she swallowed back tears and kept a frightened eye on the door, scared of who was going to come through. “I haven’t felt the baby move” she monotonously declared; her hand resting on her abdomen as a single tear slipped out of the side of her eye.

Derek paused and forced Rachel to look at him when he noticed her gaze slip away. “When was the last time you felt a movement” he calmly questioned, not wanting to worry her.

“I don’t remember” she cried, her bottom lip quivering as she realised what it could mean. All she could recall was falling to the floor and the extensive bruising on her arm indicated that she must have used it to try and protect the baby.

“I’ll go and organise a scan” Derek assured her; “are you going to be okay here?”

Rachel stared at the wall and Derek couldn’t tell whether she had nodded or if it was just the shaking of her body which had failed to cease. He smiled sympathetically and left the room, turning his head instantly as he heard a voice call at him from down the corridor.

“Where is she, she’s okay isn’t she?” Derek heard Tony yell frantically and he felt instantly sorry for the guy whose face was awash with fear.

“She’s got a concussion” he explained, trying to reassure him. “Minus a few cuts and bruises she’s physically fine but she’s in shock; why don’t you go in and see her, she’s

been asking for you.” Showing Tony to her room he figured it would be best to leave out the minor detail about the baby; there was no point worrying him when he was clearly so distressed by what had happened.

Preview:

Tony is devastated when Rachel reveals something

Martha supports Jack who is in turmoil over what Charlie's did to his Dad.