My Personal Superman

[meant2live]

This is the next one shot that came to mind. (You might be happy to know there is no death in this one) I hope you like it. Let me know what you think. And thanks for reading

Story Title: My Personal Superman

Type of story: One Shot

Main Characters: Nicole and Liam

BTTB rating: T (just to be on the safe side as there are mentions of drugs)

Genre: Drama and Angst and Acceptance... I think

Does story include spoilers: Sort of, it's an AU But I suppose Nic and Liam is kinda spoilery, so outside of Aus spoilers! (just to be on the safe side)

Any warnings: Mentions of Drug Abuse

Summary: Nicole see's that her exboyfriend is in dire need of help, but will he accept hers? With song lyrics from Finders Keepers by You Me At Six

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Nicole walked along the beach, she was taking in the scenery. The waves were crashing loudly on the shore as the wind spit sea salt and sand at her as it whipped it up in his fury. It stung alittle on the bare skin of her legs. Pulling her cardigan tighter around her, she cursed herself for putting on a skirt this morning. She had been kicking the sand beneath her feet, while swinging her shoes in her hand.

She had been quite content listening to nothing but the sounds of the sea, lost in her own thoughts. But something made her look up and when she did she stopped dead in her tracks. Liam was standing further up the beach, he'd rolled his jeans up to his knees and was standing in the sea looking out at it.

He must have been on something, he looked disheveled and disorientated. He was a mess. Running over to him, she forgot all about the cold wind stinging her cheeks and legs, and forgot about the thoughts that were running through her head. He needed help, and she wanted to help him.

You've got a nerve, giving me the cold shoulder

Giving me the twice over when it's not deserved

And we'll talk again when you're sober

You'll say that I've got cold and our heat is gone

I want to be your eyes so that you can see what you've done

I want to be your ears so that you can hear everything that's been missing

"Liam..." She spoke quietly and softly, so not to alarm him. He didn't move. He just continued to stare out at the ocean. Now that she was closer to him, she saw the tears that were falling down his cheeks. Pushing her hair behind her ears, so that the wind could not blow it all over the place, she stepped closer to him, shyly.

"Liam..." She called again, but still not reply. She realised that she had to go into the water with him. Taking in a deep breath she prepared herself for the intense cold that was about to overcome her body. She stepped into an oncoming wave, and gasped as the cold, wet water slapped against her legs. "Liam..." She called again as she stepped towards him. Reaching out and gently grabbing on to his shoulder her turned around to look at her.

"Go away Nicole." He growled at her. He looked broken and weak. Nicole felt a lump in her throat as she looked at the shell of a man that stood infront of her. He had once looked so strong, so full of life. And here he was, empty and broken.

"I want to help." She looked up at him, her blue eyes beginning to well with tears at the state of him. All he could see was the pity in them. He didn't want her pity, he didn't want anyones pity.

"I said go away Nicole! Leave me alone!" He yelled in her face. She ignored the bitterness in his words and stood rooted to the spot. She wanted to help him see the mess he'd become and help work through it. She still cared for him alot.

"You're using again aren't you?" She had once thought that she loved this man, but now he didn't want anything to do with her. He was using again, he'd fallen off his path. And now she wondered if it was her that caused him to fall so far.

She watched as he bit hard on his bottom lip, she could sense that he wanted to spill everything to her, but he was fighting his instincts. He launched his hand deep into his jeans pocket before pulling it back out and throwing a pill bottle at her. "Why you want some?"

Bending down she bent down and saved it instinctly, before opening the cap and spilling the contents into the ocean, hoping that it would take them far away. She looked back up at Liam, he stared back at her. "Screw this! I said leave me alone! I don't have to explain myself to anyone... especially you!" He screamed at her as he walked away angrily, kicking at the water as he headed back to shore.

Nicole watched as he picked up his shoes and walked away. Suddenly feeling the cold from the sea she quickly tiptoed out of the waves and made her way home.

Finders keepers will you keep me in mind

I like secrets cause they keep me in line

Old habits die hard, but I am too young to die.

I guess that a mess is what you make of it, so why are we still laying in it?

I can barely sleep, barely eat,

And it's been three whole weeks since I heard you speak.

Arriving home, she avoided eye contact with Miles who was bustling around in the kitchen, hoping that he didn't see the clear signs that she'd been crying. Climbing the stares she quickly made her way to her bedroom. Dropping onto her bed she looked at her reflection in the mirror on her wall.

Her eyes were red raw from where she had been crying, her cheeks were just as red from the stinging of the cold wind, and they still stung, even though she was in the warmth of the house. Laying backwards onto her bed, she rubbed her cheeks, trying to warm them up. She could hear the wind howel as it got stronger and stronger outside, like it was angry for the house being in its way. She didn't care where the sudden wind had some from this afternoon. She had more important things to worry about.

He'd looked so broken. He was such a mess. She wanted to help him. He needed her help, but he didn't want it. How was she supposed to help someone that rejected the slightest bit of comfort?

She thought back to a time when things had been good between them. As her mind wandered ghosts of smiles been and gone danced across her lips. She'd broken up with him almost six months ago now. She couldn't deal with the arguing that had began to consume them. She couldn't deal with his lifestyle anymore, stories always in the paper. She didn't want to read about her lovelife on the front page of the national newspaper. She'd always loved attention, but that hadn't been attention, that had been the complete destruction of privacy.

Having not seen or spoken to Liam in months, she was surprised to see him at the beach that afternoon. But now all she could do was worry about him. She closed her eyes and breathed deeply, knowing that she wasn't going to get any sleep that evening she shifted onto her side to watch the tree tops wave in the wind.

Guilt was beginning to consume her. What if it's all my fault? What if I am the catalyst thats caused him to return to his old life? What if I can't help him?

Oh it's so hard to take

That eighteen months was built to break.

Oh I love mistakes especially ones you've made.

I bet you're sorry.

Finders keepers will you keep me in mind

I like secrets cause they keep me in line

Old habits die hard, but I am too young to die.

It was another two days before she saw him again, she'd tried in vain to call him every hour. But then she saw him, sitting on the pier, it was pouring down with rain. Walking towards him she quietly sat down next to him.

"Are you ever going to get the hint?" He asked her finally, turning to look at her with bloodshot eyes.

"Are you ever going to get the help you need?" She answered his question with her own question, it shut him up. But she swore she saw a small glimspe of a smile appear on his face, even if it was only for a second.

"I haven't used today before you ask." He was shaking, was he was lying. Had he just lied to her face? She shouldn't have been shocked, but she thought she meant more to him than that.

"How long have you been using again?" She asked him solemly.

"I don't know... the days mould into one." He shrugged as he looked at his feet dangle over the side of the pier, he was ashamed at his own behaviour, that was a good sign, right? she asked herself.

"Why did you start again?" Her lips had just forsaken her, she'd just asked the dreaded question. The question she'd been longing to ask that also happened to be the very thing that she thought would make him run. But he didn't, he just looked up at the stormy sky above them, she thought she heard him scoff. But she wasn't sure, the rain was distorting everything, she was beginning to wonder if her eyes and ears were playing tricks on her.

She watched carefully as he opened his mouth and captured in the rain, his eyes were shut tight. He startled her by jolting his head down and spitting the rain water out.

"I couldn't deal with not seeing my son." Nicole was slightly taken aback by the honesty of him. She'd expected him to lie through his teeth about the reason he started taking drugs again. Relief had washed over her at first but then guilt replaced it. She felt for him, she was sad for him, but she was guilty because she'd felt a smile threaten to cross her lips when she'd found that it wasn't her fault.

She placed a caring hand on his leg. "I started seeing new people. I started hanging out with people I used to and once again I began seeking solace in drugs. It was like they were my only friend. I was mending from a broken heart in all the wrong ways." A pang on guilt struck through Nicole as she closed her eyes. It had been her fault, not fully, but partly.

"Nic... I've made a lot of mistakes in my life and I regret a lot of them, but you... you I don't regret. I'm sorry for the pain I caused you." Nicoles eyes shot open as she felt his hand on top of hers. She must have unconciously tightened her grip on his leg, because she felt like she needed to loosen it all of a sudden.

Finders keepers the whole thing is a lie

You won't find her cause she's too hard to find

Take my advice and boy run a mile.

And have another drink and then think this one over

You dig yourself a grave everyday you're not sober

Do you see what I mean

I have your best interests written all over me.

I could never be what you need

She opened her mouth to reply, but she saw the inner turmoil in his eyes and closed it again. He didn't need a lecture, he was already busy beating himself up on the inside. He needed someone to just listen to him. But she realised she could never be that person. She was too emotionally attached. Sure they'd broken up, but she still cared deeply for him. Afraid she'd get caught up in the rapture again she quickly got to her feet.

"Where are you going?" He looked up at her like a helpless little child.

"You need help Liam. And I'm not the person to give it you. I'm already emotionally invested in your life. I'm not your anchor to the real world. Even if you do get better, even if you do fight this, it won't be a matter of if you slip it'll be a matter of when you'll slip. You need to find someone that can be your rock, because I can't. We've tried this before, it didn't work. You need professional help Liam. I can get that for you, but after that... once I've got you in there... we're done. No more. All we'll be is a small nod in acknowledgment when we pass in the street."

Nicole breathed out deeply. She hoped her point had come across how she wanted it too, it probably hadn't, she was always bad with words. She'd wanted to help him anyway she could, but in one moment, in one look, she became aware that she couldn't be the person to give him the help. He looked up at her, his eyes were sad and lonely. Nicole was thankful of the rain as her tears overflowed down her cheeks.

"Thank you." He said simply. She didn't know why he was saying thank you, or what it meant. But he slowly rose to his feet planted a kiss on her lips. "I'll get better. You'll see. And it'll be because of you."

"I look forward to reading about it in the paper." Nicole smiled softly and he returned her smile.

"You promise?"

"Cross my heart..."

"I have no doubt that my number one fan will always be watching me from the shadows." He joked, which made Nicole laugh for the first time in two days. "Take care Nicole. And I promise... I wasn't lying earlier. I haven't used drugs today. But I'll let you in on a little secret... it's only because you interrupted me." He pulled a small brown envelope out of his pocket and held it up in front of her face. Taking another look at it, he launched it into the ocean below them. "Day one."

"Day one." She was proud that been strong enough to do that. Hoping that he'd be strong enough to get through this. She gave him a prolonged hug before walking back along the pier towards the dinner. She said her goodbyes to him outside, as she turned to walk him he spoke up.

"I promise, I'll never forget you Nicole Franklin." Those words cast a smile across her face, that she was sure shouldn't be there. She waved at him as she entered the diner. All she could do now was pray that he would overcome his addiction and be better for it.

Finders keepers will you keep me in mind

I like secrets cause they keep me in line

Old habits die hard, but I am too young to die.

Finders keepers the whole thing is a lie

You won't find her cause she's too hard to find

Take my advice and boy run a mile.

And I bet you guess me right

(you guess me, yes, you guessed me right)

I bet you guess me right.

It had been five years since Nicole had left Liam Murphy standing in the rain outside the diner. She'd made good of her promise. She'd read all about his recovery in the papers and on the internet. She'd heard about his reunion with his family. She'd read it all. Every aspect of his life, she'd kept in the loop on. Just like he said she would. She was proud of him. The time that they'd spent together wandered into her mind every now and then, and when it did, she wondered if he'd kept his promise too. She wondered if, even to this day, he thought of her too.

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