~Zoe~ Posted March 20, 2009 Report Share Posted March 20, 2009 Great chapter! Feel sorry for Aden, I recognise where you added the bit from the show, was before Nicole had the party I like this fiction, its really good Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
LAURZY! Posted March 20, 2009 Report Share Posted March 20, 2009 This one is my fave so far.... Loved it all, I really felt for Aden. I really loved Belle's thoughts about him at the end too Cannot wait for the next updates!!!!! eek.... lol Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jody Posted March 20, 2009 Report Share Posted March 20, 2009 I loved the last two chapters. Tony and Alf's reaction to him was done really well. I wish we could have saw small scenes like this with them or other characters on the show once he started living with Roman. I like that you never feel the need to go overboard with the characters reactions to him(whether good or bad), like here they noticed the change in him, commented on it and then moved on. Nicely done. Loved the Aden/Belle chapter even more. It was so good. I liked that you used the lines from later on. Belle trying to question Rachel about him and not talking the hint to leave it alone was kinda funny. When she gets an idea about something she really can't stop herself, can she? The scene in the kitchen was really great, it played out really well. Also Belle's thoughts at the end definitely made me smile. And he wished she knew he was serious about her looking gorgeous. Please update soon Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
xknomex Posted March 20, 2009 Report Share Posted March 20, 2009 Loved that chapter! has to be my fave so far.. love how Belle is realising she kinda likes him poor Aden update soon xxx Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Taniya_K Posted March 20, 2009 Report Share Posted March 20, 2009 That was another brilliant chapter that I could only wish they had put in the show. Seriously, you should apply for a job for being a H&A writer. You'd do good Loved their thoughts about one another. Aden thinking she was gorgeous was just And Belle trying to stop herself from liking him is just too, cos we all know it fails! Aden's thoughts when he was alone was sad, but so realistic. It kind of made the fact that he does end up seeing someone more emphasized when he rejected the idea so strongly at first, and the fact that he does it for Belle. Cannot wait for more! xoxo Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lise Posted March 21, 2009 Report Share Posted March 21, 2009 I liked the last chapter especially the last part with Aden and Belle. The last paragraph was good. I like how you write Belle's thoughts. The scene with Rachel was nice, too. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
gillyh Posted March 27, 2009 Report Share Posted March 27, 2009 Please update. Considering what we know, is coming up on screens with Aden and Belle within the next few weeks, with them breaking up and all, we could down with plenty of fluffy chapters just to keep us all happy, until they get back together on screen. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Inactive User Posted April 1, 2009 Report Share Posted April 1, 2009 Great chapter. I liked it:) Update soon please Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
wrongturntaken Posted April 7, 2009 Report Share Posted April 7, 2009 Sorry for the wait! Been quite busy but found a few minutes to finish this chapter! Thank you for all the comments! This is a VERY short chapter as i've only really edited it slightly. I've also written the next chapter, the on just after the first kiss and because this one's so short, i'll probably put it up in about an hour or so as well. Thanks for reading! Chapter 7. Takes place in 4655, when Belle suspects Aden of beating up Axel and challenges him in his room. "How is hurting Axel meant to help Melody?" Belle yelled at Aden in annoyance as he sat on his bed, leaning against the head board with a defensive expression on his face. "Look, the guys scum, okay? He got what he deserved," he explained; his words forceful and laden with obvious venom as he narrowed his eyes in hatred of the memory. "This had nothing to do with you, you've just made everything worse!" she exclaimed; raising a hand to her forehead in exasperation. "Nothing to do with me?" Aden almost shouted back, and this time there was something different in his voice that she couldn't place. "It was my fault!" It was guilt. Belle was shocked into silence at those words, "Wh, what?" she faltered. "I'm the one that sent him upstairs, I'm the one who sent that mongrel right to her, it was my fault!" he exclaimed. She looked at him with wide eyes as he avoided her gaze; she'd never seen him looking so upset and regretful. "Aden," she softened her voice. "You couldn't have known he would do something like this." "Well he was cracking on to you, wasn't he?" he said rhetorically as he looked back directly at her, "I should have known" he added as he turned his head away; a hardened expression on his face. "Aden, this was not your fault," she told him firmly but he didn't reply. "We should have gone to the police the second Annie told us," she contemplated. His head jolted up suddenly, "Like they would have done anything! It would have been his word against hers… and he would have gotten away with it, they always do." "Why would you say that?" "Why are you defending him?" "I'm not!" "Look, you don't get it, alright? Melody's never gonna be the same now, and I could have stopped that," he told her with the evident regret and guilt mixed in with his voice once more. "Aden, seriously, you had no idea this would happen…" she tried to comfort him as she sat down on the bed and placed her hand on his bruised one. He looked from his hand up to her slowly in surprise. She glanced down at where their hands had met; apparently oblivious to the touch before this, but she quickly removed it as she realised. He shook his head at her words and actions and she paused to look at him; her expression changing from sympathetic to accusing. "…is, is that why you beat him up? Because you thought it would offer you some kind of redemption?" she asked; almost angrily. He stayed silent; looking adamantly at the bedroom wall opposite. "God Aden!" she exclaimed, standing up suddenly. "Just leave Belle," he commanded her. She turned to look at him once more before a quick shake of her head and then she was storming out of the room. Please Comment! x Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
LAURZY! Posted April 7, 2009 Report Share Posted April 7, 2009 Oh that was so good! Alot better than what actually happened.... You are so good at writing these scenes I could totally imagine Aden thinking like that!! Cant wait to read the next one either! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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