adelle Posted August 20, 2008 Report Share Posted August 20, 2008 Drunk Geoff!!! That chapter was sooooooooooooo funny! Great update!! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cerise Posted August 20, 2008 Report Share Posted August 20, 2008 (edited) Eli, first of all, that was hilarious! Drunk Geoff was awesome! I like the way you included what all the characters were up to, and what was happening with them etc, a nice way to show what changed with them over the few years, I think it's important to do this if you do any sort of time jump in stories, so that the reader isn't left in the dark about everyone, and having people speak about them in conversation is a good way to do this (obviously it's not important if your focusing on one character in particular in a story, but in one where a few characters play roles it is, and I think it's better for the reader, it gives them a great sense of realism and involvement.) Great twist at the end, Geoff This is interesting, I wonder if he's tried it on with him before, or ever confessed feelings for him? Anyway, these are my favourite quotes. “Jeez, how much did you drink?” Aden asked; annoyed that he had volunteered to do it when Belle had told him she thought someone should follow Geoff home before he actually started singing to the happy couple, like he was threatening to do. “I drank exactly… Four.” Geoff announced. “Four what?” Aden muttered, “Glasses? Bottles? Gallons?” Geoff went silent for a second, like he was trying very hard to remember something. “I have no idea man,” he said, and burst out in a hysterical laughter as Aden dragged him in to the living room, “But it was definitely four!” Hahaha, that's like me when I'm drunk. I'm known to say four to everything when people ask me how much I've drunk, but I never say four what. It's usually gallons “No, seriously,” Geoff said and literally fell down on the couch, “You’ve been great, man! And your wife, damn she was hot tonight! That is one hot chick you get to nail, dude!” “Yeah, sure, Geoff,” Aden muttered. The fact that Geoff sounded like an American high school boy at a frat party, in some lame movie, had a surprisingly effective way of brushing away any jealous feelings a comment like that would normally trigger. “And you know who else looked damn hot, Aden?” Geoff continued, almost whispering now, so this was obviously a secret the empty house wasn’t allowed to hear. The comments about Aden being lucky to nail such a hot chick were hilarious, and the last line definitely brought the mystery in the middle of a humerous scene. I like that. Update soon please! PS: Something that was said earlier about geoff not wanting to be a minister any more... maybe he's done something that's considered a sin? Or what if he's gay, and that wasn't just a drunken kiss? EDIT: Hey, I told you I owed you a long comment! And I wasn't even trrying! Haha! Edited August 20, 2008 by Cerise Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
xknomex Posted August 20, 2008 Report Share Posted August 20, 2008 very intersting, Geoff gay? lol but please dont spilt adelle up so that aden and geoff get together. that might not happen but i can see it being possible! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Taniya_K Posted August 20, 2008 Report Share Posted August 20, 2008 OMG! So that's what's up with Geoff! It explains alot! I actually feel so sorry for him! I mean, he must think that he's a sinner... seeing as he was a devout Christian. Is that why he didn't become a preist? Update soon! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
KaitieL Posted August 20, 2008 Report Share Posted August 20, 2008 OMFG!!! Geoff gay... Aden wondering. I should have known though. I'm still waking up so an intelligant comment is out of the question. Had to comment thought. I know you love them. More please. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jen Posted August 21, 2008 Report Share Posted August 21, 2008 Eli, you are a legend! That is a scene I have been wanting to see for so long! Drunk!Geoff and Aden together is pure brilliance I really like how you are constructing the friendships betweeen everyone. It doesn't feel like a recount of what everyone has been up to, but just a casual chat which makes it so much easier to read. Before I know it the chapter is over. I am really intrigued to see where you take this. The dilemma of Geoff has got to be awkward. The question now is, does Aden tell Belle. Dum dum dum ... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
solaris Posted August 21, 2008 Report Share Posted August 21, 2008 Eli, you are a legend! That is a scene I have been wanting to see for so long! Drunk!Geoff and Aden together is pure brilliance I really like how you are constructing the friendships betweeen everyone. It doesn't feel like a recount of what everyone has been up to, but just a casual chat which makes it so much easier to read. Before I know it the chapter is over. I am really intrigued to see where you take this. The dilemma of Geoff has got to be awkward. The question now is, does Aden tell Belle. Dum dum dum ... Oh I can just imagine THAT conversation LOL. It could kick up one or two interesting issues for Aden though. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
adelle4eva Posted August 21, 2008 Report Share Posted August 21, 2008 LOL thats a classic! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
zzazzb Posted August 21, 2008 Report Share Posted August 21, 2008 No, seriously,” Geoff said and literally fell down on the couch, “You’ve been great, man! And your wife, damn she was hot tonight! That is one hot chick you get to nail, dude!" that line cracked me up! great update more soon? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Eli Posted August 21, 2008 Report Share Posted August 21, 2008 Thank you for all the nice comments and reviews I will probably post the next chapter tomorrow Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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