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Behind The Smile...


Guest WYN100

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**PART TEN

McGrath was attempting to invest his tone and choice of words with a respect he wasn't feeling in copious quantities and which his facial expression certainly wasn't reflecting.

"Yes sir..but if I'd known..." - his eyes rolled murderously towards the ceiling.. "...well to be honest I didn't altogether think the evidence was..."

His eyelids came down and his lips embarked and a hopefully patience-granting count to twenty.

It had been a trying day, of that there was no room for contradiction. Firstly there'd been the Annie Campbell car bump drama, then the aggravating disappearance of Jack Holden, and of course, looming oppressively over him, the whole body discovery situation and the hauling in of Rachel Armstrong for questioning. He hadn't enjoyed that. One should always be able to summon a policeman's ability to detatch his work from any knowledge of those involved - but although he admittedly did know and respect Rachel , what had bothered him most about having to cross-question her was a very basic element. As a serving officer, he had been far from convinced by the initial medical report and the way Norris had rather hastily levered it round to a position of instructing him to bring in Rachel for questioning.

"But sir, if you'd said... if you'd told me...."

The slowly steeping cocktail of aggravation and slight despair on McGrath's face from his Superior's actions and current monologue broke into urgent attention as through his office window he spied a face part of him had begun to think he'd never clap eyes on again.....Jack Holden was striding from left to right in the direction of the officers' lockers, casting quick glances left and right as he went, perhaps indicating he wasn't exactly there to start a conga line, but rather be in and out as quickly and unobtrusively as possible. McGrath tucked the cordless phone behind his ear, bustled out to the main desk, and while Norris continued his complicated and seemingly unbreakable flow down the phone, McGrath and Jack embarked on an elaborate piece of mime theatre, the senior officer's forefinger pointing first directly at Jack then with vigorous downward stabbing motions to indicate he should remain exactly where he was. Jack responded with an apologetically shaken head, coupled first with a placatory outstretched open palm, then a stabbing finger of his own, this one though directed at the exit door, seemingly indicating he wasn't planning on staying long.

If the elder mime artist could have acted smoke coming out of his ears he would have done so in emphatic style, but Jack's timely saving grace was evidently to be supplied with immaculate timing by the disembodied Norris. Briefly - and fatally- taking his eyes off his target, McGrath grasped the phone from behind his ear, simultaneously uttering an amazed "WHAT ... ??" As Jack gratefully seized the moment to dart to his locker, take something out, then ghost back across the reception area and slip out again. McGrath's attention though had been comprehensively hauled away by the information just provided by his superior - - -

"WELL ! - I have to say that IS interesting sir - and as a suspect - a GOOD bit closer than Dr Armstrong in my opinion..!"

If McGrath's attention had been so thoroughly diverted from is previous burning ambition of isolating Jack Holden for a dressing down, it certainly then did appear that the hunt to find Henk Van Patten's killer may have just taken a very significant step forward.....

The post-gardening beer had given Jesse a new lease of energy and he'd persuaded Sally to head out with him and view what he believed would form the ideal launch-pad for his - and their new future together. With enough of the day still remaining, they'd made the roughly 20 minute or so drive to a spacious, impressively laid out, but most importantly dis-used building tucked away just to the side of the mountain road that linked the Bay and Mangrove River. In its previous life it had been a busy flour-mill, but with the vast majority of such outlets now being sited on the new modern-era industrial estate to the north of Yabbie Creek it had lapsed into disuse. Fired with enthusiasm after his sport coaching placement in Africa, Jesse now spoke with infectious enthusiasm to Sally of using both that and his previous experience at the gym to turn it into a regional academy for youth and teenage sport with himself and one or two selected aides at the helm.

He and Sally strolled down the huge central room of the building, indicating where he pictured various items of kit and equipment would be sited, finally reaching the further end, and bearing left into a warren of smaller rooms that would serve ideally as offices and changing areas.

Pausing in one of those adjacent units and squatting on two elderly chairs, Jesse breathed out, nodded enquiringly at Sally and offered "So what do you think Sal, ...really...? The location's ideal, awesome road access, and with some of what I've got saved plus maybe a Government grant, this really could be..."

He stopped, brow creasing a little in surprise as she held up her hand in a gesture of caution, asking in a softer tone, "didn't you say we were the only people viewing here today..?"

He nodded, mouthing "Why..?" as he did. Sally responded by pointing to her ear then jerking her thumb at the door, back in the direction of the main floorspace from where they'd come. Still frowning in slight confusion, Jesse re-tuned his ear wavelength, gradually becoming aware as he did of voices moving steadily in their direction which had been so smartly picked up by Sally's sharp ear.

He immediately deduced there were two female voices - one unfamiliar - - - and one VERY familiar to him...

"Wow - I can't BELIEVE how perfect this will be for it - - - you were SUCH a clever girl to get hold of the keys for it...!!"

"Oh - - a girl has her ways you know !! - the young boy at the estate agent tried to put me off, saying about how other people were interested, but..." she laughed in a way expressing pleasure at her prowess at a vamp combined with high lupine cunning - "by the end, he was handing them over so quick I think his voice was about to break !- IF you know what I mean !"

The other laughed in a way that indicated she knew EXACTLY - - but then a more businesslike tone.." I just can't WAIT for this - - - ALL you have to do is make ABSOLUTELY sure of the money - - and can you just IMAGINE some of those po-faced Summer Bay types when we do....."

Her sentence lodged abruptly in her throat as Jas Curtis led the way into the small adjacent room to form a quartet that brought Jesse McGregor into sharp and enforced contact with his future, being Sally who sat smiling enigmatically at the new arrivals - and a murky, troubled and potentially volatile reminder of his past as Josie Russell joined Jas both in person and in a facial expression that wondered exactly how much of their conversation had been overheard....

Ric was trying his level best to comprehend the barrage of information that was being aimed at him by Dr West. The young surgeon had pushed him back to his room and was now sitting on the bed - firstly informing Ric again of just how lucky HE'd been to avoid serious injury in the crash.

Ric was very well aware of that and attempted to hasten West on to the two synopses he was far more concerned about - Viv , and of COURSE, baby Alice.

But West wasn't to be hurried- - "Well, you know Ric, the combination of the impact and the flames were major challenges for both Mrs Anderson and baby Alice..."

A look of horror began to invade Ric's face, but West quickly sought to assuage that - "Ric we had to work hard with Mrs Anderson - mercifully all her burns were relatively light - first degree - but the impact with the driving wheel caused major damage to her spleen - - and we've needed to remove that..."

- a sharp intake of breath from Ric - "...and to add to that, she picked up an infection during surgery that was harder to fight, so given all that and some major i/v antibiotics we've put her on...Ric, she's still unconscious..."

"But...alive...?" intoned Ric slowly- the doctor nodding in reply.

"And......Alice......?" came Ric's next question, the words almost choking him as they emerged..

West paused momentarily, as if mentally composing the most effective reply before responding,

"Ric, it was a lot more complicated with Alice - it was a lot more tricky to get her out of the car initially, so some of the burns one her arms and one hand were in the second degree range - but Dr Lewington treated those very quickly and effectively, and the outlook with those is pretty good.."

Ric remained silent, laying heavy mental odds on a 'however'..

- he would have won-

"however- ....the force of the crash saw her head initially become trapped between the car door and one of the seats as it shot back. We worked very hard to stem the swelling in that area - - - but its proved very tricky....and now we've detected some early traces of bleeding too..."

"So what are you telling me, Doctor..?" asked Ric, his voice dry with suppressed fear,

"Ric - we're going to need to operate..." West replied as softly as he could manage, "..and it'll have to be soon....." Ric opened his mouth to reply, but the doctor continued , gravely "..but - I have to tell you, there are risks - real risks - attached to this kind of surgery - - and, with Mrs Anderson unconcious - Ric, you'll have to be the one to sign the consent form....."

Ric's face reflected the stunning velocity of this bolt from the blue, as the words "Risks...real risks......" resounded again- and again - and again in his ears....

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**PART 11 **

"Rachel it's for your own good !!" Tony's voice was steady but firm, placing his hand on top of hers as she attempted to leave the breakfast table. It was the morning after her day from hell, but Tony was determined to articulate the concern that had been building up in his mind supported by a chain of events he'd noticed that had previously formed little more than an unconvincing patchwork, but now he felt he'd produced a case fit to put before the jury of experimentation.

Because of how much he loved Rachel, he didn't want this to develop into one of those "argue by numbers" situations, where Person 1 says something Person 2 doesn't like, Person 2 denies it and angrily retreats into a sulky silence, leaving Person 1 to apologize after a certain period of time, even though Person 1 still very much meant the thing they'd said in the first place on , but was subscribing to the "anything for a quiet life" principle.

His guilt over the surfing accident had given him an enhanced 'antennae'; insight into how Rachel was faring on a daily basis, and so it was that yesterday's events had topped off the cake of suspicion that had been cooking inside of him.

"Rachel I know your leg's been playing you up more and more since the accident, and that there have been days where - frankly - you've been off with the fairies somewhere ! You've told me yourself you've found it harder to get up in the mornings - yesterday at the hospital Julie seemed very perturbed about you, and then Lewington tells you he was that bothered by how you were, something could have happened to Annie ! That's why I say - CALL this group - it's in Mangrove River so it's well out of the way from too many prying eyes - and this lady who told me about it when some of them came for a day out at the gym spoke so well of it ! It's not even something as high-profile as Narcotics Anonymous - it's just a chat and support group for substance problems - not even total dependency -Plus - it could be something you could tell Lewington you were doing - head him off at the pass, so to say...? There - I've said my piece - but remember it's because of how MUCH I care about you - pure and simple. He held up both hands in a placatory gesture and slipped into the chair next to her at the breakfast table - doubtless expecting the standard Person 2 response for these situations.

Eachel had sat quietly, taking in all he'd said without responding, or indeed her expression changing greatly.

Indeed, fully 30 seconds elapsed before that changed- but Rachel seemingly - and thankfully - hadn't read "Argue by numbers"

Instead, she shuffled her chair closer to his, placed her arms round his shoulders and leant her head there.

"Thank you" she offered in a small voice "Thank you for caring so much." Another silence was followed by "It had been creeping up on me - the pain - more severe more often - - and yes, I did dive into those painkillers rather - it became a way of getting through the days, you know..? ...and it became like a one-way street, no turning back and pop another pill to get me through...."

"Rachel, I'm SO sorry...."

"No ! ", then , squeezing him tighter, "I believe I have told you sir, !! that I don't harbour one single negative thought towards you because of that surfing accident - these things HAPPEN !"!

She gave him an affectionate wink and said " At least it's meant I've seen more of you coming round to spoil me with nice treats and things ! "

Then - assembling a look of determined resolve on her face, she went on "Yes, ok, I'll do it, I WILL do it - pass me the number !"

She reached for the phone in front of a relieved and smiling Toby - - his smile would have been considerably less sincere had he known who'd enrolled in that very same group just hours earlier....

The two groups of two that had comprised such a near-excruciatingly uncomfortable encounter at the mill the previous day had spent the morning in significantly different activity.While Jesse had gone for his regular post-dawn jog through the local streets, Sally had headed for the Town Hall. She was keen to further the project that had been such a major dynamic in her return to the Bay - it was now just a few weeks till the election of a new regional Minister to the State Parliament and she'd come to passionately feel it be the perfect vehicle to re-establish and refine any Summer Bay 'legacy' after the whole Johnny Cooper incident and its various implications had tainted so many areas.

And so it was she headed off to collect application forms -with Jesse returning home 10 minutes or so later. As he made his way through the side gate and garden towards the back door, he smiled again in recollection of the discomfiture of Josie and Jas at the mill building yesterday. Passage of time had largely managed to heal raw nerves in relation to Josie, and having heard in advance about the unpredictable cocktail that was Jas, he'd not been too surprised by the genuine article - though he and Sally still hadn't hit on a genuine explanation as to why they'd been there - the flustered and rather pink-faced story obviously concocted on the spot about looking for somewhere to extend a home jewellery-making network having been one that most infants over the age of five could have comfortably torn quarry-sized holes through.

Still perspiring from the physical effort on another embryonically glorious day weather-wise, he selected the open carton of orange juice from the fridge door, lifted it to his lips and drained the remaining contents through to a sigh of satisfaction and appreciative lick of the lips. Tossing the container into the adjacent bin, he peeled off his t-shirt and with a punch of the air, celebrated two successful slam-dunks as it sailed into the open laundry basket which was tucked in the opposite corner.

Meanwhile, life had been considerably more frenetic at Jas's apartment where she and Josie had urgently discussed the next step in their masterplan - -

"You know if they get half a sniff of what we're aiming to do - - or how - - that's us flat on our faces !" Jas had fretted - Josie though had been generally more serene on the matter as they looked at it from all angles, and finally with a smile that blended resolve, steely determination and just a hint of mischief Josie volunteered her own strategy that adopted many an inspired football manager's philosophy that 'attack is the best form of defence - - if she could again succeed in 'pushing the right buttons' with Jesse , then their nest really would be feathered, both in terms of playing down their plans and finding out more about those of Sal and Jess, and indeed why THEY had actually been in the mill building too -and Josie was confident she could do it. It had been the work of just a few minutes to find the address of Sally's new house, and a further hour or so to sit further down the road in eyeshot of it, taking the ultimately successful chance on seeing Sally drive away.

Jesse breathed a semi-silent curse as the doorbell went on his way towards the stairs to go up for a shower, opening the door still clad only in his jogging shorts, there not having been either chance or likelihood of doing anything about changing that state of affairs. Josie's eyes sparkled as she stepped uninvited over the threshold closing the door behind her.

"My my Mr Hunky, !" she smiled, winking as she fell to the temptation of running her fingers across the curls of hair on his chest - her offending forefinger being smartly removed from there by Jesse's own thumb and forefinger, that gesture accompanied by a curt "What do you WANT Josie?"

She feigned offence "Now what sort of way is that to talk to someone you nearly married ?"

"NEARLY is the highly operative word Josie, now WHAT do you want.??"

Seeing the kitchen door open behind him, she continued the bold approach, looking to drift past him at the corridoor's smallest point where both Jesse and the telephone table were already restricting the space.

"Mmm - how cosy !!" she purred as she squeezed past him - Jess meanwhile could already feel his levels of patience becoming a little threadbare, and looked to turn round to bar her progress. Whether what followed was an accident or straight from the inventive relationship repertoire of Ms Russell was less than immediately obvious, but as he turned, Josie seemed to slip, throwing her hand out to break her fall as she headed downwards with a "Ooooh- Jesse !!......"

"Josie !!! What the ...."

Jesse covered the couple of steps to where she'd fallen, hauling her up in his arms till she was almost standing again - - - and missing thescrape of Sally's key in the lock. Returning to collect the essential birth certificate she'd forgotten to take with her, she pushed to door open to see her current partner dressed only in a pair of brief jogging shorts and holding his ex-fiance in his arms...

Belle's mind had been pumping at high speed throughout the previous evening and during the night as she considered what her next course of action should be concerning Dom - the background information she'd got from Luke had further fired her crusading spirit to wade in and resolve the situation in her usual buccaneering mode, but the small, soft, moderating voice in the corner of her mind had whispered consistently that playing bull to Jas's china shop on reflection probably WASN'T the ideal course of action, and though her naturally spontaneous nature could cheerfully have throttled the small, soft, moderating voice at times, she was now en route to see Drew, hoping to bounce some ideas off him.

Arriving at the house, the open upstairs window with music swirling in atmospheric ribbons out across the garden indicated very firmly that Leah was enjoying a bath in the company of her favourite Allanis Morrisette CD . Belle smiled as she continued her way in, halting momentarily as she heard the phone ring and , after a short gap - Drew's voice bellowing "I'll get it !!", presumably - and pointlessly - in Leah's direction upstairs - pointless because Drew's voice was never going to out-gun the speaker assisted Allanis in the lavender-scented bathroom above !

Belle paused at the door, then as the itch of curiosity that's within us all kicked in, heard Drew answer the phone with his customary eloquent greeting of "Yo !!" - then her brow furrowed a little as his voice slipped into what he considered to be ultra-smooth mode, though in reality she'd personally tended to find it mildly amusing..

"Well hey - this IS a nice surprise ! - and so soon again too !!"

Oh yes,! thought Belle - her female intuition heading into overdrive - so soon, eh !!! Drew was by now well into his "impress the little lady" routine that she was so used to by now that it was something she just ignored - - but used on ANOTHER 'little lady ' ?? Hmm - bring it on, whoever you are.....

She concentrated again, tuning her ear in as precisely as possible to his voice..

"No, no honestly babe, that'll be fine, I can be there in twenty or so..."

Belle's mouth dropped open -.. be WHERE ?? ..and to do WHAT ?? Her hand clenched experimentally into a fist shape, but her ears pricked up at the sound of her own name..

"Belle..? ah, not a problem ...she's probably off somewhere playing with her camera or something.." - he laughed, as thankfully unbeknown to hima murderous expression was crossing the camera owner's face just a few yards away. Restraining herself by a huge effort of will from hurtling into the house and smacking him over the head with a saucepan, she heard him smilingly end the call..|"..So hey, yep, be there in 20 or so - it'll SO be fun..!!, laterz babe.!!.."

Breathing heavily through her nose Belle hovered momentarily to confirm to herself which way he'd leave the house - then hearing - with some relief- the front door slam, revealing where he'd made his exit, she slipped watchfully through the kitchen into the living room - Leah's karaoke-style tones drifting down the stairs showed her bathtime was still far from over, so Belle took her chance. Playing her hunch, she grabbed the phone, and punched in the code to check last caller ID - - as the robotized voice spelt out the number her brow creased - - she KNEW that number from somewhere... taking a deeo breath, she pressed the option to dial the last caller back....as the phone was picked up at the other end, her eyes widened in shocked surprise- - - she CERTAINLY knew that voice....!!

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**PART TWELVE

"You had a FLAMIN' narrow escape mate, I hope you realize `that !!"

Ric halted and counted to three, biting back the obvious response that the dressings en-swathing his damaged arm and legs had probably suggested very clearly to him the kind of escape he'd had, replying only, "Too right I do grandad- anyway, it's great to see you, that's for sure. Thank God things are steadier with Alice after the op anyway, and cross fingers Viv looks like she's coming through too. !"

Alf nodded in receipt of the good news. It had been a fractured and stressful night for Ric since giving permission for the surgery to go ahead - regular cups of coffee had accompanied a string of requests for information on the baby's progress - then, around dawn, the thumbs-up and message from Dr West that the procedure had gone well, and the signs were improving for the infant, who'd been taken to the recovery ward for observation.

"Mate have you got ANY ideas on the dangerous mongrel that overtook you ?" Alf continued, his brow wrinkled in a mixture of confusion about the driver, who still hadn't been traced, despite the best efforts of the police.

Ric himself looked equally blank, "Not a one, grandad - straight up - and believe me, I'd certainly LIKE to...uh....ask him a question or two, if you know what I mean...?!" Alf certainly did, since the feelings expressed were identikit with those in his own mind - - but he did allow a sense of adult propriety to intercede as he warned formulaically "Well, don't you DARE go looking for any trouble, you hear me ??!! - your big task is to get yourself back in bonza shape, and - .." he jerked his thumb towards the door in a loose exhibition of hospital geography "....you need to get those two ladies back to their best too - we got ourselves a deal..?"

Ric nodded, simultaneously stretching into a theatrical yawn brought on by the rigours of the night - "and on that subject grandad, would you do me a favour..?"

"Just name it ..!"

"Well, would you go take a peek at Alice for me...? Its just so awesome she's there at all, and as they won't let ME that far, can I send you in off the bench ?"

Alf gave a warm smile as he rose "That'll be my pleasure, mate !.." - he pointed to the six or so empty plastic cups on Ric's bedside table - "Fancy another caffeine shot, do you...?" Ric picked one of the cups up and aimed a mock throw at Alf - his immediate limit for coffee intake had been reached and passed some hours earlier.

He stretched back onto his bed after Alf had left and closed his eyes. It wasn't yet the time for sleep to come to his aid however - such an immense amount had been shrink-wrapped into the last day or so, the internal adrenaline flowpipe was still pumping at overtime levels, making a doze of over ten seconds or so in duration an unlikely prospect.

Any attempt at counting sheep saw them repeatedly turn into high-speed overtaking cars, so giving a deep mingled sigh of frustration and low-level exhaustion, he swung his legs out of bed and flicked in desultory fashion through a motorsport magazine Alf had brought in with a brief mention of it possibly being useful with that weekend's edition of the reality show in mind - - wow, that show seemed such a far-away element of the chaotic events that had assailed him...Ric became aware of a flurry of activity in the main area not far outside his room, with some urgent voices and swiftly-moving feet, but dismissed it from his thoughts on the basis of it probably being "one of those hospital things.."

That was however a verdict he was quickly forced to re-assess. His door shot open, and there stood Alf, wearing a deeply troubled expression, one shared very much by Nurse Julie Cooper, who stood behind him.

"What's up Grandad ..?" asked Ric, a sinister grip of alarm beginning to ensnare him, "...all the cafuffle... its...it's not Alice, is it - is she..has she....?"

Word selection was clearly problematic and highly perturbing for Alf..

"Mate, when I went up, I wasn't quite sure where to look in the ward, so I called Julie and, we couldn't... mate the top and bottom of it is, Alice has GONE -she's been snatched..."

Those recent thoughts of sleep seemed a whole different galaxy away for Ric as a heavyweight migraine began to take hold within his suddenly-pounding skull....

Belle was seething as she strode towards her target destination - oh, they must think they were SO damn clever, the two of them - probably laughing at her expense at that very moment if she was any judge !!

"Oh - and so soon as well !!" she mimicked the line Drew had uttered on the phone, the words almost being spat onto the grass that fringed the cliff-top path next to the beach as she headed onwards.

And mocking her photography too !! She imagined her hands closing round his throat to try and throttle some respect into him - the more she thought about it, the more she started to believe he'd never truly respected how she'd developed that side of her life - - and what was HE bringing to the world, she'd like to know ?... other than sticking his head in car engines or hooting hysterically alongside Ric or Geoff Parker as he played Grand Theft Auto for the like 5 millionth time - sad lazy oaf that he was - - but - - - setting her jaw straight - he was HER sad lazy oaf and she wasn't having ANYONE creep onto her turf, that was for sure !!.

Before too long, she arrived at the house. Slowing down, she observed the area closely - - no cars meant no adults in her estimation, leaving, she deduced - or assumed - only her two targets. Heading to the back, she slipped into the kitchen, ears still firmly pricked on alert -no immediate or clear sound, only something muffled from above her. Heart beating fast she went to the bottom of the stairs where the swirl of sound became clearer as it spilled out - she realized to her renewed shock - - from one of the bedrooms.. Dark fury began once again to power her inner self, and with great restraint, she stalked slowly up the stairs until, outside the door, she bent her head and listened. hearing

"Oh no Drew, isn't that the GUY'S ah...job ?"

"Mmm - ok then -you come closer and I'll do it .."

"Hehehe - I may just hold you to that, big boy...!"

"Ok then - you ready ?"

"Yep - are you ?"

"Right,,,slowly now...ooooooooh !!"

Belle had by now had more than enough, hurling open the bedroom door to reveal Drew and Nicole...........entangled in a long, paste-dampened roll of.....wallpaper.......as the two inept decorators looked up at Belle with very different expressions, she wondered if the earth ever actually PERFORMED the favour of opening up to swallow people whole

Rachel had been genuinely fired with enthusiasm after making the call to the Mangrove River substance dependency group. She'd explained her position and chatted to a lady called Marje who hadn't been in the least bit forbidding or judgmental, and Tony had marvelled with relieved interest at just how long the two had talked.

Rachel indeed had exhibited a glow he'd not seen for many a long week when she returned to the kitchen, and it was clear that at least part of a substantial load had been lifted from her shoulders. Lacing her arms around his neck, she kissed him softly on the cheek and purred "You're an extremely wise man, do you know that, Mr Holden ?" His smile told everything about how pleased he was that his gamble of mentioning the group had not only paid off in practical terms, but had also seen Rachel acknowledge that the painkillers had become a problem, and as was always said about such situations, acknowledgment was the first step towards fighting and winning the ultimate battle.

Returning the kiss on the symmetrically opposite cheek, he replied "And you're an extremely brave - and beautiful- lady, do YOU know that Doctor Armstrong ?" Indeed, Rachel's enthusiasm had fired her to the extent of wanting to take some instant action. Marje had told her there was a group meeting that very evening, and had extended her a warm invitation to come along and meet the group. Being her evening off, she was willingly able to accept, and Tony was only too willing to encourage her to accept.

"Hey it's not that far away, so how about I pick you up after I finish work, and I could drive you there, if that's ok ?" It was more than ok with her, and so it was that they were in the car headed towards Mangrove River for the loose 7-30 start time.

Tackling the unspoken question that both had dwelt upon in their minds, Tony said as they neared the small village hall where the meeting was being held, Tony said "I think on balance I'll stay in the car while you go in - you ok with that ?" She didn't reply, but nodded a touch apprehensively and squeezed his hand ever tighter as he found a parking spot, kissed her on the cheek and gave a hesitant wave through the front window as she got out and headed onwards, pausing at the door to give him a brief wave before going in. Once inside, many of Rachel's concerns about such a meeting were quickly and comprehensively diluted.

She was soon greeted by Marje and fellow organizer Brent, and it soon became clear there was to be none of the stark , spotlit isolation of the "I'm...and I'm an alcoholic/addict etc etc " variety - instead , each new arrival was allocated to one of half a dozen tables arranged casually around the room, where existing members were enjoying trays of sandwiches, soft drinks, newspapers and chatting informally. Rachel was shown to a table one away from the door, where Marje pulled up a chair to join her in the company of a guy called Les aged around 30 who was looking to come down steadily from his current rate of smoking 80 or so cigarettes a day, and a slightly older girl called Lucy who was having some issues with reducing her regime of antidepressants. Reaching out to shake hands with them, Rachel smiled and said "Hi, nice to meet you both- I'm Rachel, Rachel Armstrong, and it's um...a bit of a painkiller thing I'm looking to dump , if you know what I mean...?"

They did -and nodded sympathetically - but it was friendly sympathy, rather than the grim, head-shaking, sighing variety, and Rachel soon found herself chatting energetically and with genuine relief that the problem and accompanying worries that came with it were now out in the open. She shifted slightly, feeling her cellphone vibrate a new message alert emerge from the cellphone in her bag - she knew that had it been a work emergency they'd have called her pager, so it was likely to be someone like Martha with an idle catch-up or something similar in mind and she didn't want to break off from this refreshing and unburdening conversation, so she drew to a close "..so yes, I know it'll be tricky, but I already get the feeling meeting you guys will be SUCH a good first step on the road !" They smiled and nodded, but in common with the prevailing atmosphere, there was no solemn nodding or heavy exhaling, rather more smiles as a wink from Les preceded his hand diving skilfully onto one of the plates to claim a sugar-sprinkled doughnut. Rachel clicked her thumb and second figure in mock exasperation before saying "Les, you're a hard man - my only consolation is it'll go straight to your hips !"

The others laughed again, but Rachel's face had changed quickly and dropped vertically at the sound of a voice at the one table behind her.

"Oh, yes..hi..good to meet you, I'm Lewis....Lewis Rigg..."

Very suddenly and sincerely, Rachel was wishing she could be anywhere else in the world but there...

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