Cerise Posted August 8, 2007 Report Posted August 8, 2007 You used the title! “Aaaaaaaaaaaaaahhhh!” She shrieked the most high pitched and loudest shriek that the world had ever come to hear, before flinging her hand around in the air like a hysterical mad man, and legging it straight up the stairway. “WHAT! WHAT IS IT?!” a freaked out Jack stood at the doorway, as he watched the blurry figure approach him at lightening speed. “A big hairy black spider” she cried as she lunged at him, pushing him backwards. Hahahaha she's afraid of Spiders! The really do appear like a couple, Rachel. Update soon (or not.,.. whatever. Just Update ) Quote
Zetti Posted August 8, 2007 Report Posted August 8, 2007 Hehe the banter about going into the basement was just laughing, Jack is so adorably cute and Martha is no better. I love this new Jack and Martha. Good chapter with a good vocabulary More please Quote
beckyboo Posted August 8, 2007 Report Posted August 8, 2007 Well I must say I agree with Kat, I thought they were a couple!!!!!! I like this!!!! Update soon xxxxxxxxx Quote
>>Emma<< Posted August 8, 2007 Report Posted August 8, 2007 Great start Rach. I thought they were a couple, although I now understand that was the point... Aww they seem so sweet with each other. Update soon please, or die. Only joking... Quote
Tasha Posted August 8, 2007 Report Posted August 8, 2007 “What! Are you kidding me! The basement! Im not going down there! God knows what scary and horrid creatures will be down there, just waiting to pounce and feed on my soft and vulnerable flesh!” loved that. That spider part freaked the heck out of me though. So they are only friends, how cute. And they call each other 'hun' how lovely. Loving this already More please Quote
puja Posted August 8, 2007 Report Posted August 8, 2007 Big, black, hairy spider...was that description noted from a real-life experience Rachel?! Aww, great start They're so cute. Jack's such a wuss But Martha's certainly got some guts; that makes a nice balance. Great start! Can't wait to read more soon (hopefully ). Quote
Jacksthehottest Posted August 8, 2007 Report Posted August 8, 2007 Aww yay a new fic Loving it so far, they are so cute Hehe Jack is such a wuss that its funny Update whenever you can Quote
-Jade- Posted August 8, 2007 Report Posted August 8, 2007 (edited) Rach I LOVE IT!!!!! Aww this is great, I have a feeling that I'm really gonna enjoy this. I love how you've written the dynamics of their relationship already.. Although I am in no doubt that further along the track I will be pulling my hair out at you blurring the friendship/relationship line , right now it's a great twist and something different. Your writing was really good in this - you did the dialogue very well and I also loved the humour. You gave me a few good laughs there Rach! Whoever knew you had it in you to be funny...?! I seriously can't wait til the next chapter, please post asap and put me out of my misery. Oh yea, and thanks for changing the word. Made it easier for my small brain with it's limited vocab to understand. Edited August 8, 2007 by -Jade- Quote
kaciexox Posted August 9, 2007 Report Posted August 9, 2007 yay a new fic loved all the jack and martha interaction they are so cute update soon Quote
bay girl Posted August 9, 2007 Report Posted August 9, 2007 Awwwww, i love this so much already. It' s so sweet and cute. Great start Rach. Quote
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