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Dan F

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Yeah... I know... I'm just really down at the moment. Had hoped that having something like this to fill my days with would be good, that I wouldn't have another depressive episode quite yet, but no such luck.

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Well... it's not something I know much about... but I would think that a wedding is pretty stressful, trying to organise everything and keep everyone happy. It's no surprise that you're getting upset, especially if you already have a tendency to go there even without this added pressure.

I heard something on Oprah once (I think)... something like "most women plan for the perfect wedding and forget about planning for the perfect marriage"... when all is said and done, the wedding is only one day of the rest of your life. Try not to worry too much about the actual event, and focus on how happy you'll be after it to be united with someone you love :)

I hope that wasn't too patronising :P

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You're not patronizing! :) I guess I just felt a small connection to how my dad used to be, and it scared me. I was suddenly a small 6 year old girl, with nowhere to hide. No, he didn't yell, or hit, but it was the same feeling... I have huge problems coping with men in general, I've never been close to T's dad, and... they all talk really loudly. I don't handle loud noises well, especially not loud voices :(

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Mar-Mar try to think of the possitive you have a man that you love,

thats what it,s all about at the end of the day hun life is to short to hold a grudge.

Ilost me husband eighteen months ago and there,s never a day goes bye that I dont wish him here

with me thats one of the reasons I joined this forum because I have something in common with

you all that,s I enjoy Homrand AWAY i Hope this will help you with you problem

enjoy your wedding day cos it,s so short.

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Mar you need to stick to your guns, don't let them grind you down. Its your day, do what you want.

Lil, your mate sounds like she has serious issues. Unfortunately I don't think theres much you can do. If I were you I'd tell her exactly what you think of the way she's acting and why, tell her you feel uncomfortable and can't stick around to watch her behave like that. If she doesn't take your advice then I think the only thing you can really do is take a step back and when everything blows up in her face, as it more than likely will, be there for her and don't say 'I told you so'. Sometimes people can be so blinded by feelings that they can't see what's going on in front of their faces and if you push them they'll only turn against you and still won't see whats really going on. Sometimes the only way to learn is from your mistakes and the only thing a friend can really do is be there to pick up the pieces when the penny finally drops.

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Okay... I thought I was having a good day... then my friend started asking me how I was going on my pills - which she disapproves of, because she believes that the answers to all lifes ills lie in diet... so I went off on a huge long rant at her about how I can't do anything right... Taking pills isn't right, not taking pills isn't right, eating nothing but vegitable juice, soups, taco shells (basically dry corn), and tea isn't right... and god forbid I should have some sugar once in a while because then I deserve whatever I get.

Now she tells me that I must have misinterpreted something somewhere...

I feel like absolute crap again... I can't do anything right...

Why can't people just get off my back. I SUCK. I GET IT! Why do they have to tell me what I'm doing wrong every five seconds, even though I'm trying to do what THEY want me to do to live in THEIR world? THAT I don't get...

What's wrong with me? Why do I have to care so much? Why can't I just be the selfish arrogant pig that everyone expects me to be... that way no one gets their hopes up that I can change, least of all me...

I need to get out of here, but I don't know how... I could throw all my money at a train ticket to somewhere in the country, but then what? I get stuck wandering around on someone else's land and get my ass shot... or worse... F*ck, human beings are a plague. A cannabalistic one at that.

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