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What Dreams May Come (Part One) (by I love music) - comments


Eli
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I love this!

It's beautifully written, and you really get the characters. I discover things about the characters I didn't even think about before I read your fics.

If she ever fell in love like in fairytales, it would be with a boy who never, ever expected her to sit round being girly and giggly. It would be with a boy who would want to run with her faster than anyone had ever run before, climb with her higher than anyone had ever climbed before, who believed they could touch the moon and the stars. Not Ben Smith nor Dale Armstrong (her best mate, who, Dani insisted, would really like Kirsty to be his girlfriend) nor any other boy she knew.

This is really good^ I was nodding to myself thinking "Kane" through this paragraph :)

Maybe you had to be cute like Jamie. Jamie's Mum played games with him, bought him lollies, fussed over him if he fell over. Or maybe you had to be smart. He knew kids who were heaps smart whose olds seemed real proud of them when they picked them up from school. Or maybe you always had to be real good so they never got mad at you and instead took you to the movies and bought you toys.

It was obviously his fault they didn't like him, but he tried real hard to be good, never crying, no matter how much he wanted to, when he got bashed. And he must have been cute too when he was Jamie's age. And he sometimes got gold stars in school, but when he told them they only said stuff like stop jabbering or he'd get a thick lip. He couldn't figure it. Maybe he was just plain unlikeable.

I feel so sorry for poor Kane :( You just wanna hug him!

Can't wait for updates.

And by the way, ILM, how old are you?

Edited by Eli Roenning
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Yet another well written story ILM.

I feel like I'm repeating myself everytime I review your wor but you already know what I think of your writing...it's superb.

I'm interested to see how this will lead into Always and Forever and you're still the best children's writer I've ever read.

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  • 2 weeks later...
  • QUIET ACHIEVER changed the title to What Dreams May Come (Part One) (by I love music) - comments

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