Suspended

[luckyrabbit]

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Post 4000th episode, what if Kim was the one paralyzed instead of Martha?

He could picture himself doing it, just reaching out a hand and closing his fingers around the white plastic. It shouldn't be that hard, such a simple everyday thing like picking up a cup. All he had to do was move his hand. Easier said than done.

He couldn't even manage to twitch a finger, he couldn't feel, it was like everything below his neck had just died but somehow his brain just kept on living, he was trapped in his own body. Kim Hyde was officially helpless and it was the strangest feeling in the world.

It's the drugs, He told himself, that's what's stopping me. Worried that he'd do himself even more damage the doctors had put him on a cocktail of sedatives and painkillers.

Resigning himself to having a dry mouth until one of the nurses finally remembered him, Kim closed his eyes. Sleeping was a much preferred alternative to staring at the ceiling and thinking about the what ifs. What if he had gotten that lift home with Hayley? What if he'd never insisted that Alf move him, so he could get to Martha? What if, what if, what if? But even worse than the what ifs were the thoughts of the future. Would he ever get to hold his baby? What kind of life could he provided for the helpless child growing inside Hayley's belly, if he was going to be stuck in a wheelchair for the rest of his life?

The soft click of the door startled him from his slumber. Keeping his eyes closed, -he really wished that the nurses would close the blinds before the sun got to the point where it was streaming in and hitting him directly in the face, or at the very least provided him with sunglasses.-, Kim opened his mouth to speak and winced when all that came out was a dry rasp, suddenly he felt something wet and cold being pressed against his lips.

Sucking the ice into his mouth, he opened his eyes, slowly blinking against the bright sunlight, and a familiar face came into view. "Zoe? What are you doing here?" He asked slowly, the last of the ice chip melting on his tongue. She shouldn't be here. He thought, although the reason why eluded him completely.

"My job, silly." Zoe smiled brightly, placing the fresh cup of ice chips down next to the old one, the contents of which had long melted back into water, and taking his medical chart from the end of the bed. "I am a nurse, remember? Although, if Nurse Julie catches me in here, I won't be for much longer." She whispered conspiratorially. "She's forbidden me from coming in here, conflict of interest, you know. But, hey, what she doesn't know can't hurt her, right?"

"Right." She's not to be trusted. echoed a voice in the back of his skull. Why?

Zoe finished doing whatever it was she needed to do with his chart and replaced it at the end of the bed and then, noticing his discomfort, pulled the blinds half closed. "You want some more?" She asked, picking up the plastic cup of half melted ice.

Kim tried to nod before he realized that he couldn't but Zoe seemed to know what he wanted anyway. "It will get better you know." She said as she popped the last remaining ice chip into his mouth and stroked his messy hair back off his face. "You just have to think positively."

"Hmmm." He grunted noncommittally, still preoccupied with figuring out why his brain was telling him that he couldn't trust her. After all, she was Zoe and he loved her. Maybe I've got brain damage too. He thought absently, only snapping out of it when he felt Zoe's warm hand close around his own.

"I know that it sounds like another one of my silly little…" Zoe babbled.

"I can feel it." Kim said, his voice barely above a whisper. "I can feel you!" He said louder. Zoe stopped mid-babble.

"You can? Oh my goodness, squeeze my hand." She commanded, practically bouncing on the spot with excitement. His grip was weak but it was there.

"Oh Kim!" Zoe squealed, leaning down to fling her arms around him the best she could. She pulled back to kiss him on the forehead as he laughed happily. "Oh, I've got to go tell Doctor Saunders. Just stay right here till I get back. Well, of course you're going to stay. I mean, you can't really go anywhe…and I'm babbling again, aren't I?"

"Only in the literal sense." Kim smiled at her fondly. The word stalker suddenly popped into his mind, though he didn’t have a clue why; Zoe may be a little bit quirky but she wasn't a stalker. Stupid drugs messing with his mind.

Zoe grinned at him. "Okay, well, I'll be right back-"

"Zoe, wait-" She paused with her hand on the door handle. "I love you." He'd been meaning to say it for the longest time and now seemed like the perfect moment.

Something flickered in her hazel eyes, a mix of anger and sadness that was gone so quickly that Kim thought he must've imagined it but her smile grew even bigger and she let go of the door handle and kissed him. "I love you too."

Kim grinned, making the corners of his eyes crinkle up, he'd been beginning to think that he would never smile like that again. Zoe touched his chest, drumming her fingers against the hard muscle, and he could feel it.

"Just wait right here." She instructed, bounding out of the room in a way that reminded him of his old pet Labrador when she was still a hyper-active pup.

And Kim waited. And waited…and waited. He waited until his eyes became so heavy he couldn't keep them open any longer.

"You will not believe what I have here for you!" Robbie announced loudly, barging into the room carrying a large gift basket, startling Kim from his sleep. "We have chocolate, reading material, some fruity smelling soaps courtesy of Tash, I don't know what you're supposed to do with those but-"

"Zoe?"

Robbie paused and pretended not to hear the name Kim had groaned upon waking up, that was a can of worms best left unopened. "What's that?"

"Nothing." Kim mumbled, the drugs had finally worn off and it all came rushing back to him exactly why Zoe shouldn't, couldn't have been there. She was dead. He watched as Robbie placed the basket down on the table, shoving aside the two plastic cups…two, there should've only been one. Kim's eyes flicked up the half closed blinds. "Did you close those?" He asked Robbie.

"Hmmm?" He looked to the bars of pale yellow sunlight creeping in through the partially covered window. "No, I just got here, it was probably one of the nurses. Why?"

"No reason. It was just a dream." Kim explained, his hand coming up to rub across his sleepy eyes.

Robbie gasped at the movement. "Kim-"

"What? Oh." He looked at his hand in amazement. He could move, he could feel.

"I'm going to go and get Flynn."

Kim licked his lips and tasted peaches. Maybe not just a dream, after all.

END

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