The First Time Ever I Saw Your Face

[lynhay]

Can't wait!

[fruitburstroxy]

Me neither!

[Jess]

I'm finally back home and it seems the break has been pretty productive, I've advanced further, and I really properly know where I'm going now (which is always useful to know, so anyway, here's the next chapter. Read and review, and I hope you like it, more will be coming ASAP.

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The last few days have been awful and so fantastic at the same time. Trying to keep things ‘normal’ on the outside have been hard, but knowing that there is someone out there who feels the same about me as I do him has been a strangely liberating experience. I can be who I really am around him, I don’t have to hide my true feelings.

Of course, trying to be the same for Cass and Maddie has been hard, and it makes me sad that I know that we can never realistically be together without hurting people, but I dunno, I’ve still managed to glean something remotely positive from the situation.

*BLEEP BLEEP* As I sit on the sofa later that evening watching a movie with Cass, I feel my ‘phone vibrating in my pocket. I try to gain access to my ‘phone in a way that will not disturb Cass.

“Who’s that? I thought Maddie and Luc had gone out for the evening with Tony and Beth?” she inquires, still half watching the movie.

“Oh, it’s Lucas” I say truthfully. “Him and Maddie decided not to go out with Tony and Beth, apparently going on a double date with your parents isn’t that cool”.

“I can’t for the life of me think why!” Cass says sarcastically.

“Anyway, Luc was wondering if I wanted to go round to their place and have Maddie come over here. And Sal’s gone to stay with some friends in the city, I think she’s feeling a bit down again. And we know you girls like to gossip – something that doesn’t really hold much interest for the males of the species.”

“Only ‘cos you don’t want to be around when we make fun of your lack of ability to multitask and so that you two can have debates on the ‘fittest girls in the year’ without the inconvenience of having to censor what you say in front of your girlfriends” Cass laughs.

“Oh no! You’ve outed our secret Cass” I say as I give her a playful shove on the arm.

“Yeah, that sounds like a plan” Cass agrees.

“Okie dokie, I’ll let Luc know.” I’ll b round ASAP R x

I feel so bad. I’ve purposely got rid of both our girlfriends so that I can spend quality time with Ric. But I can’t think how else I can do it. Us and the girls are like one tight unit and we spend virtually all of our time together, so this is the only workable solution I can see. But that’s what makes me feel so guilty – we’re like one big unit, it would rip the girls apart if they found out. But Ric loves me and I love him, so what can I do? I want to do right by the girls, but the other half of me is telling me to follow my heart and at this particular moment in time it looks like I’m gonna let my heart rule. But only for the time being – I know that this can’t go on indefinitely. All of a sudden I feel a pair of hands around me.

“Luc, I’m going to Cassie’s. Don’t have too much fun with Ric and don’t do anything I wouldn’t do” Maddie says playfully.

“Oh, don’t worry, have a nice night” I say quickly, kissing her on the cheek. Maddie seems so happy and content in the relationship, how can I do this to her? All of a sudden, I feel a pair of hands around me. “Maddie, I’ve already told you to go and have a great… .” I stop in my tracks. The hands around me are big and strong, not like Maddie’s small dainty ones.

“Yeah, I know you’ve already told Maddie to go and have a great time with Cass, but what about you?”

“Well, I guess that’s why you’re here” Luc says cheekily.

“Got it in one, Sherlock” I reply. “So, what’s the plan? We gonna watch a movie? How are we gonna entertain ourselves without the girls?” I ask, knowing full well what his response will be.

“I dunno, you try being Sherlock for a bit and see if you can come up with any ideas.”

“Well, I have a few, maybe we should try them out first” and before Luc can reply, my lips are on his and we’re frantic in our efforts to get to my bedroom.

When I’m with Ric, all my Cass-and-Maddie-related problems seem to melt away. I feel safe in his arms and never want it to end.

As we lie together, I’m comforted by the steady beat of his heart and soon fall into the land of dreams.

Back at the girls house…..

“It’s getting late” says Maddie, stifling a large yawn. “Shall we go and see what the boys are up to?”

“Sounds like a wise idea, I don’t think that your Mum and Tony would be too impressed to come back to a house full of empty beer bottles and crisps packets” says Cassie, nodding her head in agreement.

The girls let themselves into a seemingly empty house.

“Well, the lounge seems mercifully devoid of rubbish, that seems like a good omen” Maddie notes.

“Well, they’re men, I bet when we open a cupboard to innocently make a cup of tea, we’ll be killed by a deluge of rubbish. I can see the headline now, Girls killed by boyfriends’ mess Cassie jokes.

“I wonder where they are?” she inquires.

“Probably throwing popcorn at the TV screen ‘cos their favourite footie player has just received a red card, knowing those two” Maddie laughs.

“Ric, Luc” Cassie shouts around the house, trying to listen for any form of life. Her efforts are interrupted by a scream.

“What the hell’s going on here?” Maddie screams and Cass arrives just in time as Maddie falls into her arms in shock at Ric’s bedroom doorway.

[Jackieleanne]

Uh oh this isn't good I think poor Matilda and Cassie have just found out. Great chapter Jess can't wait to see what happens.

[Jess]

As twisted as it sounds (and I don't mean this in a bad way), I had fun writing the last bit of the chapter, trying to imagine how they'd both react. Anyways, thanks for the feedback, more should be up soon!

XxX

[Jackieleanne]

Cool, I can't wait to read it.

[lynhay]

This is great, can't wait to see what happens next.

[Jess]

I'm desperately trying to avoid revision at the moment and as I'd already got this chapter written I thought I'd post it now.

When tears come streaming down your face

When you love someone but it goes to waste

When you lose something that you can’t replace

As I look at Cassie, I see the one thing I hate the most – seeing her cry. Tears streaming down her face, leaving tracks on her perfect complexion. She’s standing there silently crying so hard that I think the stream will never end. And Maddie in her arms, curled up and shaking, but neither of them making a sound.

As my eyes adjust to the bright light, I see Cassie sobbing and Maddie curled into her arms. What’s going on? Is this some kind of bad dream? Looking ‘round at Ric, I realise with a lurch that this is in fact reality and then I notice the state that I’m in. Partially mixed into Ric’s arms, hair tousled and only a duvet around me, I realise that no explaining away can get us out of this one. I try to open my mouth, but no sound comes out, only a mime and a smack croak.

“What? Cat got your tongue?” Cassie snaps from the doorway. At a loss of what to say, I collapse back into the duvet. “Oh yeah, that’s right, turn on the waterworks and go straight back to lover boy. It’s OK, it’s only your GIRLFRIEND here, who’s bawling her eyes out. And you!” she shouts at Ric. “I thought you were different to all the other boys. I thought you loved me. I thought you treated me differently to all the other pieces of s**t that have fooled me. I guess you ARE different though, there’s not many people I know who would be with their girlfriend and then getting it on with his mate’s boyfriend the next second”. I could kind of cope with and understand Cassie’s anger, after all she had just caught me in a compromising situation with her boyfriend, but the thing that tears me apart, that rips my heart out and tears it into tiny pieces in front of me is Matilda. She’s just there, staring at me, tears escaping her pretty little eyes, with a broken, hollow, haunting look piercing me. She says nothing, just dissolves back into Cassie’s arms. People say that actions speak louder than words and I always thought that it was the biggest cliché ever invented. Now I can see the truth in those words. I feel like my insides have been ripped from me.

Cass is just standing there, staring at me.

“H…h….how could you do this to me?” she stutters, losing her previously cool and angry exterior. “W…w…..what? Did he give you something I couldn’t? Or do you just get off on hurting people?”

“No Cass, let me explain, it didn’t happen like that” I say desperately, trying extremely hard not to make it sound like I’m trying to justify my actions. “We couldn’t control it –“

“What? And you love each other?” Cassie finishes bitterly.

“Well, yeah…” This pushes Cass over the edge.

“We don’t deserve to put up with this, we’re going” Cass shouts across the room. “And don’t bother coming home” she snaps. After Cass has left the room, gingerly supporting Maddie at the same time, I fall silent.

“What are we going to do?” as I turn to face Ric.

“I don’t know mate, but I need some time to think, so I’m going to go sleep on the sofa. You understand don’t you?”

“Yeah, of course” I say as I lean over and kiss him. As Ric leaves, I’m left in an empty bed. As I roll over, I can smell Ric. Everything reminds me of him. How did this happen? In one short night, I’ve wrecked my relationship with my girlfriend and one of my best friends and I don’t have a clue what’s going on with my boyfriend. I’d give anything right now to be able to turn back time so that everything could go back to how it was before. But I can’t. And now I’ve got us into this mess.

If only we hadn’t gone to the party on that fateful night. None of this would’ve happened and it would’ve been a hell of a lot easier to suppress my feelings and we could’ve continued as before and no one would’ve got hurt.

Before I know where I am, I hear a knock on my door.

“You OK sweet? It’s nearly 11 and you’re not up so I thought I’d come and see where you are. And what’s Ric doing on the sofa?”

How can I possibly explain to my mother the events of the previous night?

“Ummmm….well….”

“Are you OK? Did you sleep at all last night? You look awful.”

“Oh gee, thanks Mum.”

“But seriously, what’s happened?”

And so, after calling a very sleepy Ric in, we recount all of last night’s events.

At the beach house…

Looking at Matilda’s swollen and puffy eyes and Cassie’s drained appearance it’s obvious that neither has had a wink of sleep that night.

“Are you OK Maddie? I mean how could they do this to us? Ric knows about my past, he of all people knows how hard it was for me to trust again. I bet that was half their fun, thinking about how we’d react when their dirty little secret was discovered. And last night, it was like Ric couldn’t wait to get away from me. I put it down to his eagerness to go and watch the footie” and with that Cassie broke down.

“Awww…..Cassie….don’t cry…”

“M…Maddie….I r-r-really thought R-Ric was the one, you know, the one I’d spend the rest of my life with, and then it turns out he’s been doing this behind my back…”

“I know hun, ‘cos I’m kinda in the same boat” Maddie says as the two girls laugh. “And you know what they say, revenge is a dish best served early” says Maddie.

“What do you mean? I know you’re upset hun, we both are, but please don’t do anything stupid.”

“Just trust me on this one OK.”

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AN: I was watching ‘Hollyoaks’ when I was writing the aftermath. And the storyline in ‘Hollyoaks’ happened to be the Justin-Becca-Jake aftermath, so I kind of got (very) emotional writing it. Being bombarded with two messy situations at the same time is not good! But it made writing this chapter a whole lot easier because I had all the depressing music and stuff LOL. I think I managed to do the situation justice regarding the girls reactions...I hope... Anyway, read and review and tell me what you think people!

[lynhay]

Very good. I wonder what revenge the girls are going to come up with. I really like this fan fic, it's different, you have a real talent well done!

[Jess]

Thankyou lynhay. I'm having great fun writing the revenge.... I wanted to make it different, not because I don't like Maddie/Lucas, Ric/Cassie, but because there's quite a few very good FanFics on them out there, and there's only so many different directions. Glad you like it though, will post more soon.

XxX