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Great chapter

so Cameron knew Brax was alive and hide it from Heath and everyone glad they know now Brax is in fact alive.

Poor Josh I hope he will be okay.

Update again soon :)

 

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Cameron's explanations weren't particularly convincing, even if he is doing his best.It's lucky Ricky had the vase to hand though.And not content with pummelling Cameron, Heath decided to trap Josh in a dark night of the soul.Mind you, him going to China and banging on doors would probably get the job done better...

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  • 2 weeks later...

Thanks to all you lovely folk who commented on the last chapter, and once again, apologies that there are such big gaps between updates. I hope you all like this one.

There's a BIG RED warning on this one, because of one particular scene that's a bit more explicit than usual. You've been warned! 

WARNING: ADULT THEMES & SEXUAL CONTENT!

Chapter 11

 

Heath pulled the car up to the kerbside. Kyle was already waiting for him with an angry scowl on his face. It was 3.30am and Heath just expected him to come sort this mess out for him?! As though he didn’t have a husband and kids to worry about! It had caused an argument with Ben, but here he was, waiting outside because Heath had asked him to. Heath had called ahead, insisting that he wait outside, no questions asked, and be ready to go when he got there. He’d mumbled something about locking Josh in a bathroom and stealing his car. Then Josh’s elderly neighbour had given him a call too, to say that she could hear him having a meltdown, and that she was worried about the young girl that was living with him. They needed to get there right now!

When the car stopped, he opened the door and stared across at Heath in the driving seat. The stink of booze hit him almost immediately. A stale and pungent mixture of beer and whiskey.

“How much have you had to drink?!” he demanded.

Heath looked a little bleary-eyed, and Josh’s beat up piece of junk had been veering all over the road as it approached. Why on earth had Cameron let him drive off in this state? What kind of cop was he?!

“Will you just get in?!” shouted Heath, as he began to rev the engine.

He was impatient to get going and he’d already argued enough for one night. Getting away from Cameron and behind the wheel hadn’t been easy! Ricky had even made an empty threat to call the police.

“I’m not getting in the car with you if you’re drunk” said Kyle, “You were all over the road… and your eyes look weird…”

“I’m fine!” snapped Heath, “I don’t have time for this! Are you gonna help me with Josh, or not?!”

“I will if you let me drive” he said, taking a step back and crossing his arms across his chest. “I’m not getting in a car with a drunk… I have the kids to think about.”

“Fine!” snapped Heath, leaning across and pulling the door closed, “I’ll go without you!”

With that, he put the car into motion and drove off down the street, wheels screeching. Kyle just stood there shaking his head. What kind of idiot was this brother of his?! Was his male pride really so fragile that he couldn’t even relinquish control of the steering wheel for one night?! He watched the car disappear around the bend. ‘Okay, what do I do now?’ he asked himself, ‘What if he gets in an accident?’

Suddenly, the car came reversing back around the bend and then up the street towards him. Heath had obviously changed his mind.

“Fine!” shouted Heath, as he leapt out of the car, “You drive!” He half-stomped, half-staggered, past him and went around to the passenger side to jump in. “Come on!” he roared at him, “We don’t have time for this!”

Kyle smiled a wry little smile and made his way round to the driver’s side. He slid into the seat, pulled the door closed, and set off towards Josh’s apartment. He glanced in concern at Heath, who was now slumped against the car door with his head resting on his arm. He looked like he was in pain. That’s when he saw the cut on the side of his head and the trickle of dried blood on his neck and all over his ear.

“What happened at Cameron’s?” he asked, “Your head’s bleeding.”

He already had a fair idea. What worried him was whether Cameron was still in one piece. He could see Heath’s bruised and bloodied knuckles. It didn’t bode well.

“Just drive!” growled Heath. He wasn’t in the mood for another telling off from his ‘goody two shoes’ little brother.

Kyle rolled his eyes but did as Heath asked. They sat in silence for a couple of streets until they headed out onto the ring road. It was a 15-minute drive to Josh’s house. He gradually became aware that Heath was looking at him.

“What?” he said, glancing sideways at him before returning his eyes to the road.

Heath shook his head in a disappointed sort of way before answering. “Don’t you ever get sick of being this…” he asked, screwing up his nose, “I don’t know… this…?”

“This what?!” replied Kyle, already sounding offended.

“I don’t know” sighed Heath, “This… this straight-laced?”

“Straight-laced?!” asked Kyle, with a look of surprise. He’d called him lots of things before, but straight-laced had never been one of them! “What?” he asked sarcastically, “Did you get ‘word of the day’ toilet paper or something?!”

“Haha” replied Heath, “…I can speak well when I want to!”

“You think I’m straight-laced… cos I don’t want to let you drive drunk and kill half of Sydney?!” he asked.

“Nah…” said Heath, “It’s just… You’ve changed, mate… Ever since you met Ben! …It’s almost like he’s taken all the Braxton out of you… or something?!”

“You don’t think 5 years in prison might have more to do with it?!” scoffed Kyle, “That maybe I don’t want to land up in there again?! That maybe I did a lot of growing up in there and realised what was more important?! …Or maybe I value my freedom just that little bit more now?!”

“Yeah… I guess” sulked Heath.

He’d done a lot of growing up over the years too but this whole thing with Brax had just thrown him for a loop. The booze always made him act more like the Heath of old, and he’d drunk more tonight than he had in a long time. He was back to being that River Boy who’d spent most of his time getting himself and his brothers into trouble. He knew he was being childish but he just couldn’t help it.

“You’re just no fun anymore…” he huffed.

“So, what?! This is your idea of fun, is it?!” snapped Kyle, “Being a total idiot?! Assaulting a police officer and… and then driving a stolen car around town with half a bottle of whiskey in your system?!”

“Three quarters” he smirked across at him.

“You think that’s funny?!” scowled Kyle, “How big a child, are you?!”

“Ah, give it a rest, will you?!”

“No really, Heath!” huffed Kyle, “You just had to go over there! …Just had to be the big man, didn’t you?!”

“Ah, Christ’s sake, Kylie!” groaned Heath, “Will you stop being such a little drama queen?!”

Kyle glared at him, and Heath held his hands up and mouthed the word ‘sorry’ in a way that said he’d just proved his point.

Kyle shook his head and let out a frustrated sigh. There was always a low-level homophobia with Heath. He would say stupid things that he didn’t really mean, and speak without thinking. He was still full of ‘locker-room’ jokes, and had never really stopped using the stupid nicknames he’d always had for him. ‘Kylie’, ‘Twilight’, ‘Princess’, ‘Ya big girl’… Even ‘Cupcake’ or ‘Tinkerbell’ on occasion! They’d never really gotten away from it. Not even after all these years.

“We’d agreed!” he reasoned with him, “We were gonna go over there in the morning… We were gonna try to talk like adults for once! …Words, Heath! Not fists! …Why can’t you ever…?”

“Okay, okay! I GET IT! …I’m a dumbass!” yelled Heath, “I know that, alright?! I KNOW THAT! …So, can you just… Can you save the lecture for another day?!” He shook his head. He was dizzy and in pain.

“At least we’re agreed on something” said Kyle. He was a little surprised at his sudden outburst, but he shot him a look that said he really wasn’t impressed. “Dumbass!” he grunted at him.

 

*****

 

“Shhh” said Anna, as she sat on the floor of the bathroom with Josh’s head resting on her thigh. She was gently stroking his hair and shushing him as he cried. She was a little bit shocked. She’d seen him have panic attacks and nightmares before, but nothing quite this bad! She could feel his body still trembling as he lay there.

‘I can’t believe Heath did this!’ she thought to herself, ‘Locking him in like this?! Just so he could go over to Cameron’s?!’ Didn’t he understand that Josh had just been trying to look out for him?! Taking his car keys had been for his own good. He’d been drinking too much, and the last thing he needed was to get arrested. Trust Heath to act like a total prick! 

“It’s okay” she said, “I’ve got you.”

He’d tried to push her away at first, shoving at her hands when she’d reached out to him, and gasping out panicked warnings to stay away. He’d crouched there, face hidden in his knees, hands frantically fielding her advances.

‘No! Please don’t!’ he’d begged, ‘Don’t! I don’t want to!’

It had been more than clear that his mind was somewhere else. Another time, another place… and he thought that she was someone else…

‘Please?!’ I can pay you?!’ he’d begged, eyes wide and pleading, ‘I’ll get you some money, if you… if you please just stop?!’

He’d continued to fight her off for what felt like forever, desperately pushing her away, and begging not to be touched… screaming every time she got too close… but she’d gradually talked him down, shushing him softly, and making very cautious contact. After a while, he’d allowed her to put her hand on his arm, although he’d continued trembling like crazy. A few minutes more and he’d even allowed her to put her arms around him.

He’d submitted. Glassy eyed and trembling.

‘Is this what he’d done with ‘him’?’ she couldn’t help wondering, ‘Had he submitted like this when that man had hurt him? That ‘Alexei’ person that he seemed to dream about all the time?’

Now, here he was lying on the bathroom floor with his head in her lap. He was back in the here and now, and she could see that he was cringing with embarrassment.

 “This is so stupid!” he sniffled, “I’m really sorry, Anna… P-please don’t tell anyone about this.”

“I won’t” she assured him, “I won’t… But… Josh…”

“Yeah, I know!” he sighed, “I need to get help… talk to someone…”

He’d heard it a thousand times before. Did they think he hadn’t tried?! Did they think that he wanted to be like this?! Freaking out and having flashbacks about a violent rapist?! It wasn’t exactly his favourite pastime!

“You don’t think it might help?” she asked, “I mean… mate, this is some serious ****… You nearly broke your shoulder trying to break that door down!”

“I know” he said, wiping at his tears with the heel of his hand, “I couldn’t help it… I mean… I didn’t really know what I was doing… I thought I was somewhere else…” He glanced towards the door and gave an exasperated little laugh. “I’m… I’m sorry about the door” he said, “I’ll fix… I’ll fix it.”

“It’s okay” she chuckled, “I took it off, I can put it back on… No harm done!”

“I can’t believe you did that!” he said, looking up at her in an incredulous way, “I mean you actually… you actually took a door off its hinges to get to me!”

“Well, I wasn’t gonna just leave you in here” she replied, “I mean…What kind of flatmate would that make me?!”

“A normal one” he said, with a hollow kind of laugh.

She rolled her eyes at him and laughed a little, but they sat in silence for a few minutes before she spoke again.

“Do you even remember what you were saying?” she asked, “Or … or what was happening?!”

He closed his eyes and nodded. He remembered all too well…

The weight of the man was crushing him. Smashing his bruised ribs into the mattress below him, and there was a hand on the back of his head, holding his face down in the pillow. He could hardly draw breath.

“Little Fish is lucky” said Alexei, panting heavily as he moved back and forth on top of him, “He is lucky… he have good… good teacher… Alexei is best teacher…He show Little Fish all good things…”

The enormous man had gripped him hard around the throat then, cutting off his air supply, and picking up the speed. It felt like he was ripping him apart. His hands were tied behind his back, so he couldn’t defend himself, and not being able to breathe was just adding to his terror.

“Little Fish is… how you say… is ‘grateful’?” asked Alexei, the words coming out in short rhythmic bursts.

Just as he thought he was going to black out, he felt the hand release, and he was able to take in an agonising rasp of air. His airways were so crushed and bruised, it felt like breathing in shards of glass. Even so, the air entering his lungs was such a relief. His heart was still hammering, but his lungs were no longer threatening to burst. And yet… there was also regret! If only he’d choked him a little while longer, he might have passed out, or maybe even died. In this moment, death seemed preferable.

Instead, he was still here! And the pain was overwhelming! Not only that, but Alexei was waiting for an answer.

“He is grateful?!” Alexei asked again, becoming even more violent with him, “Answer me!”

He couldn’t speak. He couldn’t even begin to formulate a sentence. He was clenching his jaw so hard it felt like it was going to break.

When he didn’t answer, the big man leaned down and sunk his teeth hard into the flesh on his shoulder, tearing at it like a rabid dog. Josh let out a shrill scream then. He’d stopped pleading with him to stop. There was no point.

“Say ‘thank you’!” said Alexei, when he finally let go, “Didn’t your whore… for a mother… ever teach you… some courtesy?!”

“S-Sorry!” he’d gasped eventually, “Th-thank you, Alexei!” Tears were streaming down his face.

“’Thank you’ for what?!” demanded Alexei.

“I… I…” stammered Josh, unable to concentrate because of the pain.

Alexei grabbed his hair and yanked his head back hard, so it was beside his own face. “’Thank you’ for what?!” he growled in his ear.

“Thank you…” sobbed Josh, “Th-thank you… f-for t-teaching m-me!”

This was the third time tonight. Was it ever going to end?!...

He gave a little shudder as he lay there with Anna. He knew that it hadn’t been real. That it was only a memory… A memory of something that had happened over ten years ago… But he could still feel him on him. Feel him touching him. Feel everything. His breath, his hands, the weight of his body… the pain… like echoes in his mind.

“You were saying some really freaky stuff…” she continued, “You kind of scared me, Josh!”

“I’m sorry” he said, flushing a little red and starting to get up. “You shouldn’t have to deal with all my bullsh…”

“That’s not what I meant!” she said, cutting him off and pulling him back down to sit beside her.

He looked a little uneasy, and tensed involuntarily when she put her arm around his shoulder.

“You have nothing to be sorry for!” she said, giving him a little smile and leaning her head against his. She was surprised that he let her. “I just meant that… I guess, I meant that it might help to talk to a professional about… about this stuff?”

“I have” he sighed, “I’ve tried.”

“And?” she asked, pulling him a little bit closer, “It didn’t help?”

“A little” he shrugged, “Not really… I… I dunno…”

“Maybe you need to find someone else then?” she said, “I mean, if the counsellor… or shrink, or whatever you call them… If the one you’re seeing isn’t working… then maybe you need to find someone else, someone different?”

He just nodded. He knew she was right, but the thought of talking to yet another stranger, and not being able to talk to them either, just seemed exhausting. Another person to disappoint.

“Or… I mean… you could talk to me, I guess… if you want to?” she offered, although she wasn’t sure if this was really a good idea or not. After all, she wasn’t qualified to help him. What if she said something wrong and it just made things worse?

“I need to… to um… to go” he said, glancing up at her in an embarrassed kind of way.

“Josh? C’mon?” she coaxed, “You can talk to me…”

“No” he snapped, “I can’t! That’s the point, Anna! …I can’t! I wish I could, but I just… I can’t!... I try to open my mouth and… and I want to talk… I want to! But I can’t…”

He suddenly realised that he was shouting. How had that happened?!

“I’m… I’m sorry!” he said, clambering to his feet, “I need to go!”

“Josh… wait?!” she called after him, as she jumped to her feet as well, “Please?!”

He stopped and stood in the doorway with his back to her. It was clear from the heaving of his back muscles that he was breathing too fast. He had his hand on the doorframe to steady himself.

“Talk to me?” she pleaded softly, as she approached him and tried to put her hand on his arm. She felt bad when she saw him flinch. “Josh… I’m not gonna judge you” she promised, “If… if that’s what you’re worried about? …I mean, you can tell me anything.”

“I can’t talk about that stuff…” he said, sounding a little breathless, “It’s just… Something happened to me…”

“I know” said Anna, “I know something really bad happened…”

“Then you know why I can’t talk about it” he replied, hunching his shoulders and keeping his back turned to her. He hated that she knew.

“I think you’d feel a little better if you did” she said.

He gave an exhausted sigh.

“I don’t expect you to understand” he said, “It’s just… it’s something I can’t talk about… and…”

His voice was strangled and broken.

“I guess… my head hasn’t been the same since… It’s full of screwed up memories and… and flashbacks…”

He gave a sad little laugh and turned to look at her.

“I guess… I’m just… just a total mess!”

He nodded towards the doorframe, and the unhinged door propped up in the hallway, and then gave an angry little snort.

“I mean… look at this!” he said, shaking his head, “Heath locked me in… Locked me in my own ****ing bathroom, and I completely freaked… It’s just a bathroom… in my own house. I know I’m safe here. I know there’s no-one else here… But I still freaked, like the ****ing weirdo freak that I am! …I mean, that’s all it took! …He just had to lock a stupid bathroom door… and suddenly I’m back there! Right back there with him!”

He covered his face with both hands and gave a frustrated groan.

“Ten years, Anna!” he growled, “…It’s been ten years! I should be over this by now… I should be getting on with my life, like Kyle is… moving on… being happy… but… but no matter how hard I try, he’s still able to get to me…”

He took his hands away again and shook his head at her.

“I don’t get why Kyle is so together, like nothing ever happened… and I’m this… this weak pathetic mess?! I mean… It’s like he’s in my brain…” He tapped the side of his head, “He’s in here… just… just laughing at me! No matter what I do… He’s always going to be in here!”

“Josh?” she said, taking a tentative step forward. He was scaring her now. Was he saying that he could hear voices?!

“I know he’s not really here” he said, as though reading her mind, “I know that… but I can’t… I can’t make myself forget…”

This was more than he’d ever said to her before. She wanted to ask him about Alexei. She wanted him to talk to her about the ‘him’ inside his head. But she wasn’t sure whether to push him or not.

“Josh… I…” she began.

Suddenly there was a very loud bang on the front door and they both gave a little jump. Josh turned and looked at her in a startled sort of way, his chest heaving in and out in panic. His nerves were shot to pieces.

“Josh?! Anna?!” shouted Heath, from outside the front door, “Are you guys in there?!”

“Josh?!” shouted a panicked sounding Kyle, “Mate, we’re coming!”

Before they had a chance to react, the door crashed open. They’d kicked it in! Then they heard footsteps racing towards them. The boys stopped short in the hallway, looking flushed and out of breath, and staring in shock at the dismantled door.

“What did… did you…?!” Kyle began to say, as he made eye contact with Josh. It was a searching sort of look. An ‘Are you okay?’ look. He could see how upset he was.

“Crap! I’m sorry!” panted Heath, “I’m a… I’m an asshole, mate! …I didn’t think!”

Josh just rolled his eyes at him and shoved him out of the way. He wanted to punch him, but right now he just didn’t have the energy. He started to make his way towards the kitchen. He needed a glass of water, but mainly he just wanted to get away from all the pitying looks.

“Wait, Josh?!” said Kyle, as he caught hold of his arm.

“Don’t touch me!” he snapped, as he wrenched his arm away and gave him a warning glare.

“Okay, okay!” said Kyle, holding his hands up in a conciliatory way.

He’d seen him react this way a hundred times before. There was always a fine line with Josh where he might burst into tears or smack you in the face. It was hard to predict which reaction you were going to get.

“We’re all just worried about you” said Kyle, nodding at the other two who were doing their best sympathetic head tilts.

“Just leave me alone” he grunted, before shoving Kyle out of the way and stalking off towards the kitchen.

“Seriously, Josh?!” Heath called after him, “I wouldn’t blame you if you wanted to kick my ass?!”

He’d seen his tear-stained face, and couldn’t help feeling bad. Locking him in and taking his car had seemed like a good idea at the time.

There was a smash of glass out in the kitchen, and they all turned to look, but then it was followed by profuse swearing and a repeated banging noise. It sounded like Josh was kicking the crap out of one of the cupboard doors in the kitchen.

“**** **** ****!!!” they heard him grunting over and over again.

“Josh? …You okay?” shouted Kyle, as he headed towards the kitchen. He turned for a moment and gave Heath a ‘you stay here!’ kind of glare. He’d done enough damage for one night.

Anna glared daggers at Heath as the banging in the kitchen continued. If she could have punched him in the nose, she would have.

“Josh?!” they heard Kyle say, and then the banging abruptly stopped, “What have you done to your hand?!”

“It’s fine!” said Josh, with a hiss of pain.

“C’mere, let me take a look at it” murmured Kyle.

Their voices became a lot quieter then, and Anna turned her attention back to Heath.

“Key?” she demanded, holding her hand out to him expectantly.

“Uh… yeah, sorry” he said, guiltily fishing the key out of his pocket, “That was… a pretty asshole move…”

“Yeah” she said, snatching the key angrily out of his hand, “You know what, Heath?! It really was! Even for you!”

“I’ve said I’m sorry” he said, with a little shrug. This seemed like a massive over-reaction on Josh’s part.

“Do you have any idea how freaked out he was?!” she hissed at him, as she crouched down to find something in the cabinet under the sink. “He was having a full-on PTSD flashback!”, she said, “…Thought he was back in his cell with some sick bastard… some Russian dude called Alexei!”

She was trying to keep her voice low so Josh wouldn’t hear.

“How could you do that to him?!” she scolded, “You know he’s not okay!”

“Yeah… I know” he said, “I… I’m sorry”

“So you should be!” she scowled at him.

“It was only a couple of hours!” he said, “I mean… it’s not like…”

He stopped talking when he saw the look on Anna’s face.

“He doesn’t like being locked in!” she whisper-shouted, as she stood up again with a little green first aid kit, “You know that! Everyone knows that!”

“I… I didn’t know” he said honestly, “I’ve never… No-one said anything…” He was leaning against the doorframe with his arms crossed defensively.

“Kind of common sense, though… Isn’t it?” she said, “…Comes with the territory?”

“Yeah, I guess…” he said.

It had never even crossed his mind that being locked in could trigger him, but now that she was throwing it in his face, it was glaringly obvious! He felt like the worst person ever! He also felt a little stupid. It certainly explained the freak attack that Josh had had at his house last Christmas. The kids had locked him in the garden shed as a joke and he’d acted like it was the end of the world! How had he never connected the dots before?!

They stopped talking for a moment, in order to listen to Josh and Kyle. They were out in the livingroom now. While they couldn’t see them, they could hear them whispering, and Kyle was making soft ‘shushing’ noises. Heath gave her a knowing little nod. They’d both seen Kyle in action when it came to calming Josh down. He was the only one that seemed to be able to get through to him when he was having one of his panic attacks. He was exactly what he needed right now.

Heath was glad that he’d had the presence of mind to go and get him before he came over here. If Anna hadn’t been here already, they’d have been dealing with a very different scene right now. Josh would probably have been inconsolable, and he knew that he wouldn’t have been able to deal with it on his own. He wasn’t good with this stuff.

“You’re fixing this door!” she said, picking the screwdriver up off the floor and shoving it into his hand, “And the front door too!”

“Yeah… course” he said, as he watched her walk away from him. He smiled a little when he looked at the door propped against the wall in the hallway. “Hey Anna?!” he called after her, and smirked when she spun around, “You know, for a girl… you’re pretty bad-ass!”

She rolled her eyes at the obvious sexism of his statement, and shook her head, but a smile slowly curled on her lips.

“More than you know!” she said, before disappearing out to the living-room to help Kyle patch up Josh’s hand.

Heath couldn’t help smiling. He liked Anna. ‘How could anyone not like a girl with DIY skills like this?!’ he thought to himself, with a little chuckle. He turned and picked up the bathroom door, dragging it back over to its rightful position, and then picked up a couple of the screws. He was just about to put them between his lips, when he felt his phone vibrate.

He pulled the phone out of his pocket and unlocked it. The text was from Cameron. His heart really began to race when he saw the message:

“I have news. Get everyone over to the office tomorrow morning at 9am!”

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I pretty much just exploded with joy that you just posted this chapter where was your big red warning in case that happened eh? :P

Nice that Josh opened up to Anna alittle there Josh will be ok with her in his corner Anna will see him right. More so than Kyle I think. He might have been in prison at the same time as Josh but he now has Ben. Well that's until Ben pulls all his hair out because he has married into the Braxtons haha Josh doesn't have that kind of support to help him through So Anna's the woman/amazon queen for the job.  I mean really she dismantled that bathroom door with ease :lol: What will she do next walk across hot fire coals? Plus she's a DIY girl maybe she can hammer it home to Josh that he can get through this What a girl :wub:

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Great Chapter.  As much as I have always liked Heath, He was a bit like this and it did annoy me at times. Drinking and driving and expecting his brother to get in with him was idiotic, they both have families and I find it surprising that Heath wasn't more supportive of Kyles change in life and I'm a bit worried that He still calls him all the names especially since his change in sexuality and his prison sentence. I thought that he would have grown out of that but obviously not and especially saying that Ben has taken all the Braxton out of him was not such a great thing to say especially after his issues when he was in prison thinking that none of them cared about him. Poor Josh being locked in the bathroom, that is not good at all. Glad that both Anna was there for him through until the boys got there. I loved this chapter, can't wait for the next chapter. Please update soon. 

 

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